play_burnman Reviews

The Mandalorian (2019– )

Belongs in a Trash Compactor on the Detention Level

[1/10 · 13 November 2019]

This was so bad I don't even want to spend the time reviewing it, but I must.

From the get go it was pure tropes and lame humor, with an extra helping of fan service. Now, I don't really mind the fan service but it was very heavy handed and seemed to take precedent over things like the plot making sense. The character waffles between certifiable bad a-- to bumbling idiot depending on what the writing needed. It felt a strange combination of shallow, forced, and rushed (plot wise). Practically every scene had some moment that made no sense if you even remotely reflected on it.

It was very pretty. If you are the type of person who can turn off your brain, drop your expectations to nil, and feast on eye candy, then this is for you.

If you were hoping for Star Wars to redeem itself and finally do something worthy of the title, well keep waiting.

But hey, who knows? Clone Wars didn't get off to an amazing start but it sure ended there.

Flavorful Origins (2019– )

English Translation/VO Horrible

[4/10 · 17 February 2019]

I wanted to enjoy it, it's certainly pretty, but the voice over brings the whole thing down, couldn't even finish the first ep. It's poorly translated/written and delivered.

Sucker Punch (2011)

Had low expectations...loved it.

[10/10 · 26 March 2011]

Here's the thing about this movie, its demanding. You have to be able to let go, realize that it's stylized after a modern comic book (of the adult genre), and just go with the movie. Let it take you on its ride, which is a beautiful/wonderful thing.

You also have to pay attention. This movie is layered in metaphor and is way more cerebral than one might expect. You have to work to understand what's going on and part of that work is letting it take you away.

If you can do this, and your friends can do this, you will have hours of conversation afterwards about what it all means, what the metaphors mean, and what was actually happening in the 'prime' reality of the insane asylum.

If you can't do this you will probably think the movie is stupid, contrived, and pointless. But you would be wrong.

Oh...and beyond all that stuff above...the fight scenes are an absolute nerdgasm, a sci-fi/fantasy orgy of epic proportions.

Steam-punk Nazi Zombies... I came out of that movie feeling like I just had a threesome with Isaac Asimov and Anne McCaffery.

I absolutely loved it.

The Last Airbender (2010)

Pleasantly Surprised

[8/10 · 6 October 2010]

Let me start by saying, I have never seen the anime. I completely understand how that might change opinions...

That being said: I liked it. This is a kid's movie and a fun one but you have to always remember, its based off a cartoon made for children. As such it should be allowed some leeway. The fight choreography is awesome and well paced. M Knight never blows his wad in a way that makes following choreography pale. The world is wonderfully fantastical and for the most part the effects hold up. Certainly there's a couple scenes where you can tell its a green screen but its rare that any movie pulls off the flawless green screen/virtual set immersion.

Speaking of green screens the acting is a little thin in parts. I chalk this up to the difficulty of directing actors on a green screen. It takes someone with a ton of experience at it to pull outstanding performances out of actors when they have no visual queues to work with. So I'll let M Knight slide a little on this one too.

And I come from a place where I loath M Knight movies...

In the end, I say its a wonderful children's movie, filled with emotional content, spiritual undertones, and some saweet fight scenes that I would consider age appropriate for youngsters. (No blood, no death, and many a person gets up and runs away.) I can't wait until my daughter is old enough to watch stuff like this with.