gazzalodi Reviews

MH370: The Plane That Disappeared (2023)

Too much airtime given to fantasies

[2/10 · 24 April 2023]

There could have been a quality 90 minute documentary in here. They could have spent more time with the guys from Inmarsat going through how they reconstructed the ping data. They could done the Australian search efforts justice by giving more airtime to what they were dealing with in their searches. They could have spent a lot more time going over the debris search rather than making it sound like some random guy bought a plane ticket and 'mysteriously' found wreckage.

Instead we get conspiracy theories that make absolutely not logical sense.

Avoid this. It's a bad youtube video that got Netflix funding to polish it up a bit. Utter crap.

Wednesday (2022– )

Hope there's a season 2

[9/10 · 28 November 2022]

How could anyone compare to Christina Ricci's Wednesday, I thought going in to this. Jenna Ortega nearly did, possibly would have if the story didn't focus on her, and she could have just deadpanned one-liners here and there like CR's Wednesday did. But since the show is all about her, well she's darn awesome. JR is definitely my second favorite Wednesday behind Ricci. Which is saying a lot because Melissa Hunter's 'Adult Wednesday Addams' was pretty amazing as well.

I won't give away any spoilers. I'll simply say this is a must see entry for any Addams Family fans. I like Luiz Guzman's Gomez better than John Astin but not as well as Raul Julia. Catherine Zeta-Jones is servicable as Morticia but no one will every be able to own role as Carolyn Jones did, and Anjelica Huston was a little more enjoyable as well.

The supporting Nevermore cast were all quite good as well. Do yourself a favor and watch this. It's fun, even if you aren't a Addams Family junky.

RoboCop (2014)

Not as over the top as Verhoven's, but watchable

[7/10 · 8 November 2022]

It's not a classic like the original, but it's a decent movie. Much more character building than the first one, which let's face it, is not why one watches Robocop. That really slows the pacing down from the original. The violence is less cartoon-y as well, also not a good thing. I prefer my scifi shoot-em ups to be more unrealistic. In just about every way this version suffers in comparison. But leaving out Robocop '87 and comparing this one with what's coming out of Hollywood these days it is above average. Not great, but worth a view if your queue is empty. If you have a chance though, watch the original.

Star Trek: Strange New Worlds: Strange New Worlds (2022) Season 1, Episode 1

Clears a very low bar easily

[8/10 · 18 August 2022]

Wow, finally something good to feel about in Trek besides The Orville. I held off on watching because I didn't want to be disappointed again. But I'm really enjoying so far (up to ep 6).

Things I like - TOS-ish uniforms. Seeing Uhura in a kinda-sorta mini again brings back memories of Nichelle Nichols, the first woman I had a crush on. Too bad Gooding can't rock it like Nichelle and Zoe did. Maybe if the cut was more flattering.

Number 1. Rebecca Rojmin is spot on perfect in this role. This is what a strong independent woman is. Not spending half of each episode blubbering like a brokenhearted middle schooler. Don't much care for her 'tragic backstory', but at least they don't define her by it.

Erica Ortegas. Finally someone who can be a Checkov (Walter Koenig) replacement. I wasn't sure if I would like her at first, but then I realized the character she was playing and it fell in place. Protip for Paramount- We don't need to know anything else about Erica, just that's she's awesome at her job and trades cool one liners with Pike from time to time.

Pike. With Michelle Yeoh were the only things watchable on S2 of STD. Was kind of worried when they had him be all 'traumatized' the first couple episodes, but they seemed to to be pulling out of that, hopefully they don't screw him up.

Not so good things.

La'an Noonian-Sing. Stupid wedging in of an unnecessary, unlikable character. Plus making her a Burnham who is just better at everything than everyone else right off the bat is super freakin' annoying. Welcome to the Enterprise Miss Wesley Crusher. Oh well at least she makes everyone around her way more likable. Maybe she'll be so awesome that a traveler will come take her away. Also get the feeling the actress is just hoping for a crying scene at some point.

Heavy handed political messaging. Roddenberry/Moore/Braga were awesome at slipping in messages without beating you over the head iwith their opinions, and giving people options to discuss. This batch of writers continues the subtle as a hand grenade attempt at alienating half the fan base with no room for people to make their own decisions about the 'issues'.

Ethan Peck still isn't working for me as Spock.

The wacky camera work. Not a fan of all those wild swinging camera angle shots they do these days.

Dark Shadows (2012)

Watch the orginal soap opera instead.

[3/10 · 6 January 2022]

This just showed up on Netflix so we watched it (we have been re-watching the original series and are up around episode 250).

Right off the bat the movie suffers from some horrible miscasting/character development. Carolyn and Roger being the most horrific mistakes. Carolyn doesn't work as a whiny early teen, she's a whiny early 20s. Stripping out Quentin and giving his traits to Carolyn with a toss away line pretty much sucked as well. Roger should be fabulously camp with the best snarky lines, delivered while snuggling up with the liquor cabinet, not a bland wallpaper villain rifling pocketbooks at a party. His whole character was just wrong.

Johnny Depp as Barnabas works up to a point. Though his sorta-sex scenes were pretty cringe and detracted rather than added to the story.

The early part of the movie starts out well but it really falls apart rather quickly. The conflict between Angelique and the Collins family (a la Burk Devlin) looked like it might have some teeth, but it stalls out with some lame set pieces. I'm a fan of Alice Cooper, but his inclusion just ate up time that could have been used for story telling.

By the end the whole thing is just creaking along feeling like it was looking for a place to stop. The big budget Hollywood treatment really strips away the shoestring budget charm the soap opera had.

I did like how Maggie and Vicky were merged. To me they were the most boring characters in the soap and mashing them together was a nice was of including them both.

Squid Game (2021– )

Starts off strong then gets pretty weak at the end.

[6/10 · 29 September 2021]

The first couple of episodes a very well done and pack a punch, but by the end it just seems to run out of steam. The marbles episode was the last real swerve, after that it becomes paint by numbers to the point that I started fast forwarding through most of it just to get it to end.

Early episodes are an eight, final episodes are a three.

The Happytime Murders (2018)

Worth a watch if your queue is empty

[7/10 · 24 September 2021]

Like others I skipped this for a long time because of all the bad reviews it got. I should have remembered that movie critics are usually wrong.

This isn't an award winner, but as far as mindless fun goes it serves that purpose fine. I go back and forth on Melissa McCarthy, she's okay in this one, nothing special. The puppet sight gags are the reason to watch this. If you like Robot Chicken, this runs in the same vein of humor.

Countdown: Inspiration4 Mission to Space (2021)

Couple of stars off for the music, especially then end of ep 4 song.

[8/10 · 13 September 2021]

Interesting background stories of the 3 everyday folks and their billionaire benefactor taking them all to space.

Not much in it for the hard science space fans, but if you like stories about everyday people taking on grand adventures this is pretty good.

Not sure why people are complaining about SpaceX advertising itself. It's a for-profit company, of course they are going to advertise the heck out of themselves to drum up business. Good on them, I hope they get more business and are able to send even more people into space and get the funding to get us to Mars in my lifetime. I watched the moon landings when I was seven and it sucks that we've done bupkis since. None of the other alternative organizations are making the progress SpaceX is at present.

Cinderella (I) (2021)

We did laugh a couple of times

[6/10 · 4 September 2021]

So it's not terrible. It's kind of like an action movie, turn off your brain and watch stuff happen. Some of the big set piece song and dance numbers go on a bit to much, especially the ending. And, yeah it suffers from trying to be the wokest with the mostest, making sure that it ticks every checkbox and at times story be damned if it makes no sense. But most of the individual comic gags work and the 'smaller' songs are fun. We burst out laughing when they spun up Seven Nation Army.

I'm not sure why they felt to need to put a 20th century sewing machine (Ella's Singer 66) complete with it's corporate logo on display when trying to present a sorta-Regency era fantasy. I mean it's not like Singer is paying for product placement to remind everyone that they used to make the best sewing machines on the planet and now they make plastic junk.

Free Guy (2021)

Funnest of the year

[8/10 · 27 August 2021]

Lighthearted romp with a bit of romantic comedy thrown in. Some of the 'real life' story was on the draggy side. You can never have too much Ryan Reynolds.

It's also one of those movies where not everything in the trailer makes it into the movie, which is a shame because I was wanting to see how some of those trailer scenes played out. But overall, well worth the price of admission and snacks.

The Witcher (2019– )

It's a mess

[3/10 · 16 August 2021]

Filled with all kinds of stuff that doesn't make sense. A single example - Everyone who goes into the Brokilon Forest must drink of the water that makes their intentions known. Well everyone except for the one guy who if he drank of it would have expose him as a fake. Then it's kind of 'meh, nevermind'.

That kind of junk writing litters this show and keeps it from being enjoyable for anything other than watching for the plotholes to pop up. Oh, and that hedgehog princess' boyfriend guy. Sorry that whole episode was just spent with everyone in the room yelling. 'He's a freakin' hedgehog.' whenever he came on screen.

Bouncing timelines work when you let your viewers know what timeline they are watching. Just chopping the narrative up and throwing it out in a random order doesn't do anything but annoy. Westworld made use of it as a gimmick that worked for one season as kind of game for Reddit fans. Then proved that it was just annoying in season 2. The Witcher annoys with it right off the bat.

Henry Cavill shows the range that made him perfect for Superman. No one does wooden grunts like Cavill. A great drinking game would be to watch it with subtitles on and have to drink every 'Hmm' is written on the screen when they show Cavill.

Masters of the Universe: Revelation (2021)

I would look for zero stars except for the animation

[1/10 · 15 August 2021]

He Man is front and center on the ads, but MIA in the show. The characters are no where near what they are supposed to be. It's just a mess. I feel sorry for the animators who had their work wrecked.

Oh and I guess someone is making some effort to get some of the bad reviews removed. My first review was up for several days then got pulled.

Invincible (2021– )

Good, the comic is better.

[8/10 · 15 August 2021]

Yes it's bloody and gruesome. Just like that comic thankfully. The animation mimics the comic. I was pretty surprised that they stayed with it.

The voice actors are top notch. The biggest hit for me it wedging the woki stuff in that wasn't in the book. By the end I was just skipping any scene with Amber in it. The character's reason for even existing in Mark's life makes little sense, and skipping scenes with her doesn't impact the narrative in the slightest. She exists simply to be morally superior or outraged, depending on the time of day. I'm sure that when it comes time for Invincible and Atom Eve to become a couple we'll find out she's decided to become nonbinary too. So a couple of stars off for the pandering.

Jupiter's Legacy (2021)

The 30s stuff was getting better by the end.

[6/10 · 15 August 2021]

By the end of the series I was hoping they would stay forcused on the origin story more than the modern 'kids of' story. Hardly any of the second generation characters was sympathetic. Almost every one of them came off as entitled brats. Overall just another kind of meh "deconstructing superheros" show. I think the market is pretty saturated with "dark-n-gritty" superhero shows. Having one where half the cast is unlikable get cancelled is no great loss. It's time to thin the herd. If you are bummed this got cancelled I recommend reading the comics. They are completely different that the show and about a billion times better, plus the story is ongoing.

Tip for people developing for Netflix. Never leave a season with a cliffhanger. Doing that will guarantee Netflix is going to cancel your show.

Black Widow (2021)

Not as bad as feared, but DC is doing it better right now.

[7/10 · 10 August 2021]

The bummer about this one is that the acting was really good, but the CGI fighting just overwhelmed the story telling and really was way too busy and jerky to enjoy. Most of the action sequences could have been trimmed way down and not lost any of their impact.

Glad to see marvel give us a straight up villain who isn't complicated. He's a bad guy who needs to be defeated. Nice change from the TV shows.

The weirdness with the Taskmaster being played by two different people thing was annoying. They should have matched the physical sizes of them better or spent some of the CGI budget fixing difference.

It's a shame the we didn't get a Black Widow movie until it didn't matter in the story line and that Marvel felt the need to bury some really good acting under so much CGI spentabulousness.

The Suicide Squad (2021)

Favorite superhero movie/show of the year.

[8/10 · 8 August 2021]

Other than a couple of slow spots needed for exposition, the movie moves along at a nice pace. It earns its R with lots of comic book gruesome violence. James Gunn knows how to make comic book movies that's for sure.

All the characters are well cast. Idris Elba and John Cena have very good chemistry as rivals. Margot Robbie is excellent again as Harley Quinn, a shame they didn't have Gunn direct Birds of Prey.

The movie shines at what it is, a comic book movie. No great political statements being made. We didn't have to put up with anyone's virtue signalling in the run up to release. A movie with a cast and crew that knew what their job was, to entertain, and hit the mark. Too bad Marvel forgot how to do this. Hopefully now that DC remembered with their last couple of releases they won't forget as well.

Critical Role (2015– )

Entertaining for what it is. A great ad for D&D.

[6/10 · 5 August 2021]

Six stars isn't a bad review, it's actually a raving positive review because most D&D streams are 2 star at the best.

Yes Matt Mercer is an awesome DM, though egregiously gentle. Six plus years of this show and 0 tpks and only one DM PC kill? Not realistic.

Yes it sucks that most new DMs now try to be Matt Mercer clones not realizing this guy has decades of practice. But hey, there are NEW DMs now because of him. So good on him for that.

The show is very entertaining. The most watchable D&D show being streamed. Is it 'scripted'? Yes, mostly. The outcomes are predetermined (they have let that slip numerous times). They have to be given the guests who show up and how many things end on point to make the next plot narrative thread work. But that's okay because if you watch the online play streams, not scripting the narrative arc can really bog down a stream as a DM tries to cover for the fact that he wasn't expecting the party to go all murder hobo and set themselves up as feudal lords of the gnomish fishing village they were only supposed to spend a day in. Fun for players, but boring to watch. That said I do think the moment by moment interactions are improvised.

Yes, some of the players are long winded emo edgelords. If you don't like those scenes skip the 20 minute angst-fests and fast forward back to the narrative, you aren't missing anything. If you like emo edgelord roleplay, then enjoy.

Yes there is a ton of virtue signaling (but seriously, not as much at the game producer, WotC, does) and yes one of the characters spews their RL political views through their character enough to catch a lot of nerdrage. So what? In the six years of the show that character's annoyingly uneducated (they obviously don't realize one of the parent companies they shill for got busted using slave labor in China) political rants make up about ten minutes.

Yes the shows fans are legendarily thin skinned and have toxic reactions to any criticism of the show or characters. Look at all the downvotes for anything that isn't a 10 star review here. But unless you leave a comment that isn't absolutely glowing in a forum/youtube comments section about the show you can easily avoid the "leave Britney alone" types that make up a majority of the show's fan base.

Final conclusion. Worth watching if you are curious about D&D or want to a D&D fix between your own sessions, just avoid interacting with their fans. Not worth watching if you are wanting to know the hard mechanics of how a D&D session actually work or want instruction on being a DM. Matt Mercer and other, even better, DMs have a bunch of separate series of DM'ing tips on Youtube for that.

Ragnarok (2020–2023)

Makes the Disney Marvel stuff laughable

[8/10 · 4 August 2021]

Everyone writing woki-wokeness in Hollywood should be forced to watch this series. This is how you can put a 'message' in a show that is massively entertaining. I think the difference is that this show has writers who are actually passionate about their story rather than just barely literate hacks who will pretend to believe anything as long as they get a paid.

This is the kind of show that keeps us from cancelling Netflix. They come up with them just often enough.

And man, the season 2 Loki story line is super cringe but good.

Loki (2021–2023)

How is this over an 8 when most reviews are in the 1-4 range

[3/10 · 4 August 2021]

The first episode was fun, messing with Loki stuff. But then there is nothing else. The plot is the same boring plot plot of everything now. So the only thing this show could have possibly had going for it was Loki being Loki. And.... not so much.

I didn't make it to the final episodes, which is about par for the Marvel TV shows. I don't think I've seen one all the way through yet. The stories just go pffft after the first couple of episodes when the writers decide it's time to stop entertaining and start preaching.

I hate to say it, but Disney Marvel is making CW teen romance DC Superhero shows look good.

Shadow and Bone (2021–2023)

Very good Edwardian/Czarist high fantasy

[9/10 · 24 April 2021]

Having never heard of the books this was all new to me. The story hooked me right off the bat. I watched the whole series over two days. I enjoyed how the tempo kept building but it never felt like they got into a hurry to get things finished too quick. The backstory woven in with the current action kept the pace moving forward.

The characters are well cast and have good chemistry. The writers didn't fall into any "overpowered waif" traps that so many shows do now. The good guy team needs each member. The bad guys aren't cardboard cutouts and eventually we even get a bit of why the bad guys are not just being bad for the fun of it explanation.

Overall one of the better Netflix offerings in the past few years. One star was knocked off because they ended on a cliff hanger and we all know that even with a really well done show on Netflix odds are that it won't be back for season 2, so we'll never know what comes next. Oh well, off to read the books.

La Révolution (2020)

Zombies? Vampires? Bah, who cares, it's fun.

[8/10 · 24 April 2021]

Pacing is on the slow side. Plot twists are more like plot plow straight ahead with their obviousness. Some of the villains/pseudo villains were lifted straight out of existing shows, like Game of Thrones. But all that said, I did binge it in a single setting.

Just because it's French doesn't mean it has to be deep. It's kind of mindless fun fantasy alternative history. Kind of a better done "Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter".

Anyone expecting anything approaching real history needs to step away from their screen for a few months. A shame Netflix dropped this show when they they fund so much other unwatchable junk.

Zack Snyder's Justice League (2021)

Uneven but good overall

[7/10 · 22 March 2021]

It's not a masterpiece, nor is it hot garbage. It's entertaining, if a little long winded at times.

Cyborg should have had his own origin movie rather than wedging his story into an ensemble piece like this. His backstory and the Clark/Lois rekindled romance really drag the pacing down at points. Also Cyborg deserved having better motion capture, being one of the stars. So much of his movement looked like it was done used hobbiest level IK rigging. Steppenwolf did look much better this time around.

I really hope they make a movie that includes more of that dark alternate future from Batman's nightmare. Jared Leto's Joker is getting much better.

Brave New World (2020)

The source material is a solid 8, the hack writing is a 0.

[4/10 · 4 February 2021]

A perfect example of how talentless Hollywood clowns can screw up anything.

They take Huxley's fevered dream dystopia and decided that it needed an uber-evil murderbot AI? I can see the pitch meeting now. "We take A Brave New World and add Delores from WestWorld, or Skynet from Terminator, or ALIE from the 100, etc... We'll just shove a worn out SciFi trope into a story that doesn't need it and prove how brilliant we are." ... sigh, idiots.

And what's with the soundtrack? They blow the entire music budget getting Edge of Seventeen so had to get the songs from the 'public domain' category on Soundcloud or something?

The parts where they stayed true to the book were solid. The new stuff they crammed in sucked. Thankfully Peacock killed this abomination after a single mind numbering season.

Alice in Borderland (2020– )

Japanese Gut Punching

[8/10 · 12 January 2021]

If you get tired of OP characters in non-existent peril with Netflix's US productions, this one will fix that for you. After we watched several episodes my son walked away shaking his head and said, "I'm going to go read All Quiet on the Western Front" to cheer myself up.

It's pretty darn good. A couple of the games had some holes in them, and some of the character behaviors didn't make sense outside of it's what the writers wanted them to do at that moment. But really watching this is more about feeling like the last year wasn't so bad compared to what these characters are going through. Hoping Season 2 can keep pace.

The Midnight Sky (2020)

I couldn't get past the communications incompetence

[2/10 · 3 January 2021]

Did anyone even call NASA/ESA/CNSA/Anyone or heck even watch any of the hundreds of other movies about spaceships in the solar system to see that communications still happen, they just take longer. Someone would have sent them a messages saying "Hey guys, Earth is blowing up. Peace out." Sheesh, that massive plot hole alone knocked off about half the possible stars since communicating with the ship was the whole point of this movie. The rest of the missing stars are just because it's so freakin' boring. It did stay at 2 stars because even though Clooney is a clown in RL, the guy can act. Good to see him finally acting his age.