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Reviews
Yonggary (1999)
Where is MST3K when you need it?
Not worst movie ever, because it contained the immortal line "That thing makes Godzilla look like a pussy!" However, the effect were banal, there were too many plot cliches, and the acting was not merely wooden, it was petrified.
But, it was funnily bad, in ways that could easily be pointed out. Thus, I would have picked this for Mike and the Bots to abuse instead of "Overdrawn At the Memory Bank," this week's MST3K offering.
Besides the above line about Godzilla, I liked the one deviation from cliche that this flick offered. At one point the commander of the elite ranger unit "T-force" describes how dangerous the mission to blast the monster will be and one sensible soul actually has the temerity to back out of the suicide mission - and they let him quit! I loved it. Of course, there was an eager young lieutenant right there to volunteer to wield the dropout's "Hellblazer," of which the new cannon fodder stated "I've studied its designs and protocols." Gotta love total misuse of the language in scenes where the moviemaker's actually trying to be serious.
Please - make this movie the next MST3K release in theaters.
Vulgar (2000)
Oh boy - whatever it was trying to do, it missed by a mile
I have the stomach for the more brutal scenes in this movie (they're not too far removed from the "Zed's basement" scene in Pulp Fiction, after all), but definitely not for the shabby plot and the weak supporting actors (OK, also the headliners). I wanted to see this movie out of morbid curiosity, and expected little other satisfaction than that from it. I was not disappointed in the depth of my disappointment. I support the effort that went into attempting what must have semed like an interesting story, but more effort was needed and better actors. AND MORE REWRITES.
OK, specifics. "William/Flappy" is simply unbelieveable in his reaction to his attack, as is his friend's reaction to his recounting of it. Except we were primed for this lack of credibility early in the movie when "William/Flappy" got the whole transvestite clown idea in the first place.
Also, there are completely unnecessary distractions throughout the movie. Examples: the abrasive waitress, the abusive drunks, William's overacting bitch of a mother (her bit of scene chewing was more appropriate for an early John Waters movie, and even he wouldn't suffer such silliness now). The erstwhile TV host who interviews Flappy is completely miscast, and would have been better served as one of the supernumerary homeless guys laced throughout the movie.
The movie made me angry, for wasting my time and for being so ill-conceived in its plot that even Raelians couldn't suspend disbelief long enough to take it half-seriously. Perhaps every moviemaker has a "Vulgar" in their background.
OTOH - I'm not recommending against anyone renting "Vulgar," but I am guaranteeing you a bad time when you do. Some people want to see everything Kevin Smith has touched/been affiliated with. They should rent Vulgar. The DVD has a bonus feature on the fecal meteorology unleashed upon "Dogma," while it was being made so, to paraphrase Carl the groundskeeper, "It's got that going for it." I would be interested to know if anyone else has noted the persistent lack of synchronization between this movie's sound and picture - something that made an unpleasant viewing that more "memorable."
Superstar: The Karen Carpenter Story (1987)
A serious movie and a gem of originality
The first time I saw this movie was as a last-minute thing, and it was double-billed with John Waters's "The Diane Linkletter Story," which was unfortunate. "Superstar ..." is dead serious, and addresses eating disorders straight-on, while still giving the viewer an honest view of Karen Carpenter's life, pressures, and place as an artist (I still hear people refer to her as having the most soulful white voice of her generation). I think a lot of our uneasiness with films that (even wrongly accused) seem to make fun of Karen Carpenter (and "Superstar ..." certainly does not, but its unconventionality leads some to take it as frivolous), is that, when Karen Carpenter died, she'd become uncool, and we made all the jokes about her, and now we feel guilty.
Seeing this movie should pick at the scab on that guilt a bit, which isn't a bad thing.
In contrast, "The Diane Linkletter Story," also about a famous young woman's untimely death (suicide from a high window), was a joke made to shock the audience. Not that that's bad -- I'm a huge JW fan and always will be -- but it has nothing in common with "Superstar ..." TDLS was filmed on the very day that Diane Linkletter killed herself, and so contains very little reflection or morality. It's not supposed to since (I believe) it's a parody of "on the spot" news coverage in which there is no rest time between actual events and the reporting thereof.
It is that rest time, and the reflection that Todd Haynes put into "Superstar ..." that makes the movie so touching and illuminating, regardless of his choice of materials/cast.
And the music still haunts to this day ...
Series 7: The Contenders (2001)
I hate reality TV, and this sends it up beautifully
My kids go on and on about Survivor, and my gay friends seem to be crack-addicted to The Real World. To me, the best thing to come out of reality TV was comic author Judd Winick (of "Barry Ween: Boy Genius" and "Frumpy the Clown" fame), who is as nice a person as you'd ever like to meet, and got his first notice on Real World San Francisco with Pedro Zamora...
Until now. Series 7: The Contenders, inspired (I'd guess) by that silly dreck on TV gives real conflict, superb acting, and great production choices. It is a movie that everyone under 55 should see. The best part of it for me was when my buddy Tom showed it to me and I said "I recognize the main female character - where have I seen her before?" and he replied "I'll give you a hint: 'It rubs the lotion into its skin.'" Expect greater things from Brooke Smith - she delivers in this movie and will eventually win an Oscar with the right vehicle. She's also very attractive, even though the two movies I've seen her in played her frumpy/frowsy.
Topsy-Turvy (1999)
Yes, but is it art?
This is a beautiful movie with few beautiful people in it. Although the setting is this famous team, G&S, the movie tells tales of aging, mortality and human frailty. And yes, it does tend to weigh in on the question of what is art (though it makes no attempt to answer that question). I particularly loved Gilbert, who seems so senseless to everyone around him except at the crucial point in the movie where he decides about "The Mikado Song." Also touching was the use, as Sullivan sits abed contemplating his dimming prospects for artistic glory and his every-shortening days, of "The Long Day Closes," a part-song written by Sullivan for no particular stage show that I know of, which muses on the closing of one's "book of life." The words are not presented in the movie, more's the pity, but it shows a keen sensibility for the moment and a keener knowledge of Sullivan's ouvre by the filmmaker.