Albino Farm (2009) User Reviews

Watchable screamfest- maybe too much screaming.

[mesa147-1 · 4/10 · 30 June 2009]

Well, I must say it was more than I expected- what a title! A quick description would be a mash-up of Texas Chainsaw Massacre and The Hills Have Eyes. This is classic low budget horror flick that ticks all the boxes for clichés(- see Scream!). The storyline is simple, four teenagers happen upon The Albino Farm and then the horror begins.

I won't say all the acting was bad- I'll just say not everyone was bad. In fact both the female performances were stellar- esp. semi nude scene- which was blatantly a body double. It kept me watching. I will admit the film was so bad that I stopped it playing twice. Maybe it was the shame of realising I actually wanted to know where this tripe was going or it may have been anger- that someone actually made this for my enjoyment.

Was it worth watching? It might be better than watching nothing. I've seen much worse than this.

Make a check list of horror film clichés and check them off one by one

[movieman_kev · 3/10 · 25 November 2009]

Four college friends decide to stop of in a bizarre back-woods town full of people with birth defects while heading deep into the Ozark Mountains for a class assignment, entranced with these 'freaks' the group decides to investigate further much to their own detriment. The film is based, albeit extremely loosely, on the real Albino Farm. Also for any wrestling fan who only want to see it for Chris Jericho, you'll be disappointed as he's not in the movie much despite getting top-billing.

This is a dark film. Not really in subject matter, just that a good deal of the last half of the film is night time and more than a tad hard to see. This of course hampered my enjoyment of the film somewhat, but what I could see wasn't all that bad for a low-budget "Hills Have Eyes" clone. Some of the special effects were surprisingly effective (not counting the atrocious cgi towards the end of the film) and the acting was mediocre, yet well done enough for a film of it's ilk. There's absolutely no doubt that this movie won't set the world on fire, but it's competent enough to warrant a rental for undiscriminating fans of 'hillbilly horror'.

Eye Candy: Alicia Lagano's body double briefly flashes her breasts and Bianca Barnett gets topless but she's in 'pig bitch' make-up

My Grade: C-

MTI DVD Extras: Commentary by Co-writer, directors, producers Joe Anderson and Sean McEwen & co-producers Barry Curtis and Jason Stewart; a 24 & a half minute Behind-the- scenes featurette; a written essay on the legend of the farm; cast & crew bios;and trailers for this movie, "Pandemic", "Metamorphosis", "Killing Ariel" & "Cash"

Where are the albinos? All I saw were redneck mutants.

[capkronos · 5/10 · 13 September 2009]

Take four teens. Put them in a desolate area out in the sticks. Destroy their means of transportation. And then unleash the killer hillbillies! This same exact formula has been used time and time again for such films as THE T EXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE, THE HILLS HAVE EYES, WRONG TURN, CANNIBAL DETOUR, THE UNDERTOW, BLOOD SALVAGE and countless others. ALBINO FARM is the newest addition to the subgenre and sticks pretty closely to the expected formula. In other words, if you're already well versed in these kind of films, you've probably already seen bits and pieces of this one elsewhere. On the plus side, it's actually fairly well made. Though the budget isn't astronomical and the concept isn't exactly fresh, the filmmakers at least put together a competent film. The actors are all decent, the mutant makeup designs are good and they chose a good shooting location in one of those old looking towns in the deep south (around Springfield, Missouri).

Stacey (Tammin Sursok), Sanjay (Sunkrish Bala), Melody (Alicia Lagano) and Brian (Nick Richey) are out on a road trip doing some kind of history class assignment. They encounter a dwarf using a spatula to scrape a smashed animal up off the road (yum!) and then a blind gas station attendant (Duane Whitaker) who tells them to read Leviticus 21:16 (hint, hint) before stumbling into a small town called Shiloh around dark. While there they discover that all of the townspeople are afflicted with either a deformity (hairlips, conjoined fingers, etc.) or a handicap (some are are blind, deaf and mute). They also learn about a local legend centering around a place on the outskirts of town called Albino Farm. The four naturally make the unwise decision of checking the place out and end up running into a batch of murderous mutants.

Kevin Spirtas (from Craven's awful HILLS HAVE EYES sequel) plays a tent revival preacher and wrestler Chris Jericho (who really isn't too bad in his minor role) plays a hick who makes one of the girls flash her breasts for a ride. Some of the action takes place in a cave, the ending is surprisingly effective and every once in awhile there's an bizarre moment that catches you off guard, such as an elderly lady breast feeding a mutant baby or a pig-faced mutant woman in cut off shorts who does a strip tease before ripping out a guy's teeth with a hook. There's some shoddy CGI and annoying wobbly camera-work present, but thankfully it's not overused. Could have been worse; worth a look.

Not that bad for straight to video B horror!

[Nocgirl72 · 5/10 · 11 September 2011]

This has been on cable late at night and I finally sat and watched it all tonight. Creepy horror movie and the acting is NOT bad. 3 out of 4 of the main characters have impressive Hollywood resumes so these actors are not no talent bimbos. This movie is actually watchable.

Simple story about 4 young adults that go looking for an "albino farm" in a town full of hillbilly's and misfits. They run across a seemingly nice old lady who tells them stories about the town but it turns out she is just as weird as the whole town. Make-up on the creatures is good and this movie is not cheesy like many of the genre. Script is not stupid either and somewhat believable.

If you are up at night and see it come on, watch it.

Worst Bit Of Saliva I Have Ever Swallowed

[ashsdarr · 2/10 · 1 July 2009]

I don't understand why financiers would waste their money (not to mention time)to provide us with such inept film work. I was unfortunately sucked into this grim tale by my curiosity about he mystique and legend that surrounds the Ozark terrain.

After the opening credits (which were good, thats why it gets a 2, you start noticing the shoddy camera work and FX, jeez these were bad. I in fact thought that this was in fact a parody of movies in this Genre (in the vein of Sam Raimi or even the Wayans Bros) until i realized that this was in fact horrible attempt at entertainment. The actors were absolutely atrocious, I wanted them to get slaughtered especially the white dude. Someone inviting that much trouble ought to get it. But let me tell you, you are going to have to wait for some gore, its only in the latter part (past 40min) that you will get a dose what i consider the worst CGI i have ever seen, worst than a Mark Dacascos movie. The make ups on the deformed people where so bad, you could in fact notice that they were wearing masks. MASKS, you gotta be kidding.

As for Y2J, he acts better on a WWE episode than he ever will in a movie. The Rock, Cena even Kennedy have managed moderate to big budget roles, the rock has even made it his full time career, i don't understand how Y2J would pick a crappy movie like this. Don't believe the hype, believe the word.

Bottom Line, on my top 10 crappolla list just behind the 5th Commandment, and in front of 10 Dead Men. Jeez Louiz

A mixture of Genre Classics

[Bobart · 3/10 · 22 November 2009]

"Albino Farm" is a mixture of Genre Classics like "Hills have eyes", "Wrong Turn" and "Texas Chainsaw Massacre", it has a great atmosphere, some good shocking moments and a fine appearance by Scream Queen Bianca Barnett (unfortunately she hides her beauty here behind the wild mask of a character named Pig Bitch).

Those are the good things about this movie. The actors here, especially the Leads, are that bad that you may ask how they get their parts. Maybe because they didn't cost money. The male lead actors are the worst I have ever seen in a movie. The guy who plays Brian makes fun about the hillbillies but he himself looks like one of them, the other guy who played Sanjard (or whatever his name was) gives such a wooden performance that you may think he is a robot and not a human being. He speaks his lines without any emotion. The girls are nice but no good actresses, too. But they scream and shout and show some emotion and that is much more than the male actors do.

The ending is pretty funny but I have seen this kind of movie and also this kind of ending in a few more movies before so it really is not new to me. Don't expect a masterpiece, there are much better Horror Movies but "Albino Farm" is nice entertainment on a rainy Sunday Afternoon.

Once you herd in the clichés you can wash up for dinner

[StevePulaski · 3/10 · 22 July 2011]

What could've been a very crafty and very intelligent piece of horror turns into a very formulaic and very familiar piece of the slasher film genre we see far too much of. Albino Farm's premise is interesting, but the execution is very poor, and we can see the movie struggle to maintain its short eighty-five minutes by delaying action until around forty minutes in.

Albino Farm takes forever to get going, and when it does, you only wish it had more to offer. The film focuses on four teenagers (Sursok Lagano, Richey, and Bala) who venture out to document the Ozark Mountains for a school project. When the duo get a flat, they head out to a gas station with a strange, unsettling owner who warns them to turn back. One of the dumbest, cockiest, lame-brained teenagers in recent memory convince the gang to travel up to see what the hype is about.

They stumble across the town of Shiloh, which looks like a ghost-town. They learn that many of the town folk fear a legend called "Albino Farm." The teens split up with two going in search of the farm, and two going in search of a church. After doing the genius thing of getting picked up by a hick and two identical twins, they are taken out and abandoned at the Albino Farm. Let the horror movie clichés, jokes, antics, and chase scenes begin.

I believe this film is based off of the legend of a group of College students adventuring around the Ozark Mountains and never returning home. Either this is the legend itself, or a followup to it. Whatever it is, it is poorly executed.

Low budget horror films can't be critiqued by their budget. What you have it what you have, and I believe I shouldn't penalize the producers, directors, etc for working with what they had. I can respect that. But so much is done poorly. In order to believe the characters, you have to throw logic out the window. What makes you want to venture out to the deep part of the Ozarks in the first place? Curiosity kills the cat, and when you stumble upon creepy woods, it's likely to kill you as well.

The sound editing is messy. One point there is dead silence, the next moment the bass almost blows your speakers followed up by very dim talking. Your remote may need to be in your hands at all times for this. Not to mention, the pitch dark lighting may call for a brightness tune up. What a temperamental film. You need to pretty much modify everything on your TV to be satisfied while watching Albino Farm.

This also seems to be influenced by every redneck-slasher film on the market today. Throw three great horror films like The Hills Have Eyes, The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, and Wrong Turn in a blender and it'll spit out this mediocre horror flick. Creativity is here, but the execution is like a dog on a leash fighting to inch itself closer to its desired destination while the owner is tugging back. Imagine the producers as the owner, the movie itself as the dog, and the destination being "typical redneck film schlock." There's a metaphor that will sum this up.

The makeup effects is where this film starts to redeem itself in quality. The effects on the creatures are realistic, but then the film wants to add some digital effects on some of the people. You can pretty much do that on any free editing system, and do it a lot better. Not being a Mac user, I still am sure this can be done one way or another on the Photo-booth program that comes free with the computer. They can do that, but they can't add some sort of effect to brighten up the scenery.

I can tell the crew were serious about making this film like the legend or something close to it. They didn't fall on their neck as much as they fell on their face in their attempts with this. Albino Farm, still, could've been great b-movie horror. What we have here, is just lazy editing and a lazy script ripping off so much of every other movie in its genre. It's a copy of a copy.

Starring: Chris Jericho, Richard Christy, Tammin Sursok, Duane Whitaker, Alicia Lagano, Nick Richey, and Sunkrish Bala. Directed by: Joe Anderson and Sean McEwen.

This was actually probably the worst HORROR MOVIE EVER!!

[Capt_Horror · 1/10 · 27 June 2009]

One word comes to mind - CHEAP. I saw this movie because I heard WWE's Chris Jericho was in it. I am actually shocked that such a big name would agree to be in this garbage. I honestly believe anybody off the street could do a better job than the director did on this movie. The actors are terrible, I can ensure none of them will get any more roles in movies after this disaster. The movie looks like something you could achieve by running around in open fields with a camcorder screaming. AVOID this garbage at all costs. It's a terrible rip-off from movies such as Wrong Turn and Hills have eyes. Chris Jericho can't act, his accent changes half way through the movie and he looks like a complete JOKE....a PRO WRESTLER and looks to be about the same size as these stupid college kids. I just hope the budget was no more than $20 because thats how bad this really is.

If u've seen them all,....

[zfiany · 3/10 · 20 December 2009]

After you have seen so many horrors and become some how addicted, you wouldn't mind watching a below average horror movie because you just wanna sit and watch something that's supposed to be horrifying. This movie has nothing new at all. It's everything else u've seen; Wrong Turn, House of Wax, the hills have eyes, the devil's ground, etc...

There is no single element of surprise in the movie but it's still a horror movie that only has a new title and you are so addicted to horrors that you wouldn't mind watching.

Gotta admit it though, that there is no horror scenes at all! There are some not good horror movies but which at least have one or two good scenes. Not this one though.

More rubbish low budget horror.

[poolandrews · 3/10 · 12 December 2009]

Albino Farm starts as four teens are driving along in the middle of nowhere in the name of research for their rural America project of some sort or another, after suffering a puncture & stopping off at a gas station for repairs the four friends learn of a local legend concerning a so-called 'albino farm' which intrigues them & they feel they could make a good project out of the legend & decide to stick around the area to investigate. The four split up with Stacey (Tammin Sursok) & Sanjay (Sunkrish Bala) asking some questions around town while Melody (Alicia Langano) & Brian (Nick Richey) head out to the albino farm itself after some locals offer to take them there. Once there however they discover a dark & terrifying secret while back at the town it seems not one normal person lives there as things get creepy for our teen protagonists...

Written, produced & directed by the pairing of Sean McEwen & Joe Anderson this is a pretty poor clichéd ridden backwoods mutant Hillbilly teen horror slasher that has little to nothing going for it. The opening twenty odd minutes is a collection of horror film clichés with a group of city teens driving along in the middle of nowhere, a punctured tyre, the amazing revelation that their mobile phones don't work, a slightly weird gas station attendant, a sinister legend & a incomprehensible desire by the teens to investigate. This feels like a carbon copy of the opening of Wrong Turn (2003) & then once the albino farm is mentioned it takes absolutely ages to get to it which makes for a very boring thirty odd minutes as anyone in the audience is well ahead of the game & knows that's where the film is going to end up & the fact it takes so long to do so just kills any interest, tension or momentum the film had built up. Then once the mutants turn up you can throw in a large dollop of The Hills Have Eyes (2006) & it's sequel with lots of running around in caverns at the end where there are lots of conveniently placed bottles of propane with which the heroine can use to eliminate the mutants, now who left them just lying around? The character's are all horror clichés & it's very predictable as to who will be the lone survivor, the plot is poor with not much reason behind anything, there's no reason behind the albino farm itself, no reason behind the mutants, no reason behind the deformed townsfolk, no reason for anyone to kill anyone & there's even a rubbish ending that makes no sense.

I have a couple of big problems with Albino Farm on the production side of things, first of all once the film switches to the albino farm it becomes incredibly dark & I found it was almost impossible to follow what was going on, the mutants themselves never say anything so there's never any dialogue & they just scream & grunt & it becomes really annoying as there's like a straight twenty minute stretch of near darkness with quick editing & nothing on the soundtrack but grunts & screams. Then there's the low body count, only three people die on screen, someone gets a hook through their mouth, someones arms are broken & head twisted around, two character's arms are sewn together but little else in the way of gore. I also have no idea why it's called an albino farm, there's no albino's there & it's not even a farm either.

I would suspect that this had a low budget & it shows with a straight to video look, it's competent but unspectacular. Apparently filmed in Missouri. The cast aren't great with ex Home and Away regular Sursok quite nice looking while Chris Jericho was a WWF wrestler I believe at one time.

Albino Farm is a poor low budget horror film with clichés aplenty, a rubbish story that doesn't make any real sense & a low body & nudity count that doesn't help matters either. Very little to recommend here I'm afraid.

Pleasantly surprised

[GRubin88 · 8/10 · 30 June 2009]

I actually thought this film was pretty good. It had a strong story and kept my interest. I had fairly high expectations for it and was not disappointed. There are some things in it I had never seen in a horror film. I think the direction was good as well as the acting. I did think the ending could have been a little tighter. I see where the filmmakers were going with it and what they were trying to accomplish but again, I would have liked a different ending. I also thought the make was fantastic. They created some characters and monsters that were quite memorable. I also thought all the stuff dealing with the bible passages was clever. Overall, I would recommend seeing this film.

I actually liked the film (SPOILERS)

[sford2776 · 7/10 · 1 July 2009]

Albino Farm is a horror/thriller in the vain of The Hills Have Eyes, Texas Chainsaw and Wrong Turn. While I definitely wouldn't say it was in the ballpark of the first two mentioned films, I would say it was a pretty valiant and entertaining attempt. (SPOILERS) The story starts out in a typical and conventional way with 4 college students on a road trip deep in the Ozarks. After encountering a hillbilly dwarf in the center of the road who seems most interested in scraping up some roadkill for his family stew, the students find themselves with a flat tire, leading them further off the beaten path. The next scene wasn't my favorite, a tad too much exposition with the Pulp Fiction guy recounting a local creepy legend called – of course – the Albino Farm. But, once the group finds themselves in the town of Shiloh, the movie gets quite interesting. Without getting too much in to the plot, there is a cleverly used bible passage which not only enlightens our heroes to more of the mystery, but draws them further in. They eventually split in to two teams and the movie takes off. Chris Jericho (of wrestling fame) did a fantastic job of creating a character that is nothing like what he plays on TV. He is the father of two twin-hicks that lures 2 of our protagonists further in to the woods and eventually in to the farm itself. His scenes with the main character of Brian were well paced and executed – very good stuff. Eventually, all of our heroes make it in to the farm where chaos reigns. The group gets split up and the carnage begins. There are actually some interesting kills – including a scene with a grotesque female mutant hillbilly girl who wants to – get this – mate with Brian! Classic! The ending is somewhat befuddling. I'm sure some will come away a bit miffed. Without giving away too much it is even a tad ambiguous for my taste. Does the girl stay in the farm? Is she now one of "them"? Does she get killed?? But I do get what the filmmakers were trying to accomplish. The direction was strong with nice pacing and there were even some nicely composed shots – especially at the end before the main girl runs in to the tent. Bottom line, the film isn't going to change anyone's life but it was a fun entry in to the horror pantheon… heck, it does have a great title, "Albino Farm"! That in and of itself is worth something. Overall, I enjoyed it and would watch a sequel. Hopefully they would reveal more of the actual farm and its history. I give it 3.5/4 out of 5 stars.

You've seen this before a dozen or six time better

[dbborroughs · 3/10 · 6 December 2009]

Okay boys and girls I want you to fill in the blanks: Group of college students go out to Albino Farm where terrible things are said to have happened to see what the real deal is. What they get there "blank" happens. If you said terrible things you get a point. If you said terrible things to the audience you get five points and a lollipop. You've been there, you've done that and this is yet another film about crazies on the loose in the wilds somewhere. Its a not bad as such but its so incredibly by the numbers you'll be wondering why you're watching it when there are so many better variations out there. If I were you I'd skip it and find something else to watch.

Poor Tammin Sursock

[garyoakpokemonmaster · 3/10 · 27 October 2009]

I always watched Tammin Sursock on Home and Away years ago, it's such a shame that her career has not moved forward. This movie feels like it was filmed on someones home video camera. The cheapness is the main thing. It's just unpleasant to sit through. It feels like The audio was horrible and the continuity was often off, with characters moving ever so slightly in most scenes which was noticeable and annoying to watch. I don't know why you would agree to make this movie, I have worked on film sets before and you can tell when people know what they are doing or not, these people clearly were rushing. Even watching a sitcom is more realistic and fun to watch. Take "Dead Set" the British TV series for example, that was not a huge budget production but was an awesome adventure to watch. The camera angles have been taken into account poorly for the cheap cameras.

A rushed and cheaply filmed movie with no passion. 3 stars.

Please, don't waste your time watching this.

[harry-austin · 1/10 · 13 October 2009]

I have seen a fair few films, while many I have enjoyed I have also seen many terrible ones, most of these being horror films of an extremely poor quality. This film, 'Albino Farm' however is probably the worst I have ever seen.

To start of with, you know when a horror film is terrible when you find the supposed 'scary' or 'gory' scenes humorous, unless the film is designed to be of this sort of entertainment, a 'parody' style film (Shaun of the Dead, one that most a familiar with). This however, was meant to be 'edge of your seats terror' yet to me all it appeared to me was not even that.

In a nutshell, the plot goes along something like this:

1) Some jocks and some attractive girls get lost.

2) An unusual elderly man attempts to scare them.

3) Night falls, they happen to be in a forest, and things begin to 'gobump in the night'.

4) Deformed Texans attack them.

I have just saved you watching around two hours of one of the most poorly made pieces of cinema ever made. If you want to see a good horror film/thriller I suggest you watch 'Silence of the Lambs'(1991), 'A Nightmare on Elm Street'(1984), 'The Birds' (1963) and 'Scream' (1996).

Add this to the list of all time baddies

[cheflounder77 · 1/10 · 5 February 2010]

When a WWE Wrestler is the "and" at the end of the starring credits, its gonna be bad. This worthless piece of trash is filmed in a town in Missouri where they supposedly have this "Albino Farm" that is of legend somewhere in the Osark Mountains. Everybody there is inbred or has some type of physical deformity. The Main characters are a joke. Four college kids researching rumors in the Osarks - Stacy, Brian, Melody, and Sanjay - for a class assignment. WTF? What school are they going to? Then Brian, the jerk, wants to make fun of some rednecks so they go into this revival and sit there and talk to a guy that looks like Chris Elliott in Scary Movie 2. Then they go into town to eat and meet a girl with hoofs for hands. They then split up and one team talk to Chris Jericho to take them to the Albino Farm. Then comes the first redeeming quality of the movie - Melody flashes the hicks to get them to go. As this goes on and on, on the albino farm, there are disfigured people who want to kill everyone and then Stacy, who was clearly a B cup earlier in the movie has opened her polo to partially expose her now obvious D cups to become the second most redeeming quality of the movie - you don't see them, but they bounce a lot. In the end almost everyone dies, and Stacy goes crazy. This movie was an absolute travesty and I REALLY want the $5 I spent at Blockbuster (This was a new release?) and the 95 minutes I wasted on this back. I think Chris Jericho owes me.....

COMMON PLOT

[nogodnomasters · 4/10 · 26 July 2018]

We have all seen horror movies of similar plots from Texas Chainsaw to 2001 Maniacs. This one was done better than most. First I would like to give kudos to Scott Rockenfield who provided us with an exceptionally great and original soundtrack of both rock and blues.

I would also say that the supporting cast outside of the 4 main characters did an excellent job, especially the guy with the twitch. Now as for the plot...Could we leave out the "we didn't pack a spare tire for the beer cooler" routine? It doesn't work. Instead make the spare tire flat. It accomplishes the same thing without making everyone look stupid.

So how is it the gas station run by a blind guy had the exact same tire and rim, already inflated and balanced sitting out behind country service station? The slasher part needed to be better. A little Rob Zombie type action would have fit in at this point

Albino Farm

[a_baron · 2/10 · 10 December 2021]

If you go down to the woods today, something nasty will happen, and if you are familiar with the genre you will know more or less what. It starts with four of them on the road trip - two guys and two girls - this one apparently for some sort of school project. And they happen upon Albino Farm unwisely ignoring the warnings of the locals to leave town PDQ.

The main problem with this film, but far from the only one, is that most of the action happens in the dark, so even if you understand what's going on, you can't see it. Aside from that, "Albino Farm" is just awful, not even the soundtrack can save it.

Poor Wrong Turn clone

[Stevieboy666 · 3/10 · 30 March 2021]

Four students head to the southern backwoods populated by freaky rednecks for a school project but stupidly seek out Albino Farm, a place where some seriously deformed looking hicks live. If you have seen any of the Wrong Turn movies then you know what to expect, only this one is far worse than the worst of those. The students are not only annoying characters but they are played by people who clearly cannot act. The freaks themselves do look pretty scary, however the picture is very dark and it is often difficult to see what is happening, which isn't much to be fair. Nowhere near as gory as the Wrong Turn movies, this is a very poor movie.

you should see this film

[emelsimsek74 · 10/10 · 26 September 2009]

I couldn't believe in my eyes when I first see the first comment about that film on this page in which somebody has written that the film was cheap. In my opinion the freak characters was looking so real that I think I am going to see them in my nightmares tonight. The end was good and the plot was SO good. Especially the women freak and the baby freak have so frightening looks. I will never forget the old lady who was feeding the frightening looking baby and also I liked the freak girl dancing sexy first then showing his creepy face. At the end the priest....... ha ha ha of course I wont tell the end of the movie see it for yourself

Somewhat flawed but still highly enjoyable

[kannibalcorpsegrinder · 7/10 · 17 September 2012]

While attempting to uncover a series of local urban legends for a class report, several college students stumble across the horrifying truth behind a small town's past of deformities and freaks and race to escape before they fall victim to the same source.

Overall, this one wasn't too bad and definitely has it's moments, especially once they arrive at the titular location and they start getting attacked, which is a lot of fun due to the different types of stalking techniques employed throughout, from running by in the background to traps being laid out and all kinds of different torture and bloodletting done that makes for some pretty nifty gore from time to time. However, despite all the attempts it tries in the beginning to make it feel creepy with it's set-up for the town's inhabitants, it just comes across as a one-note gag repeated for about forty-plus minutes and makes them look ever more stupid and idiotic for willingly staying around when it's much more logical to leave, and it has a few other issues to work out there as well, but it's still not all that bad.

Rated R: Graphic Violence, Graphic Language and Brief Nudity

Hillbilly, hillbilly... come out, come out wherever you are...

[heatheroffdead26 · 9/10 · 7 October 2009]

I must admit, I love hillbilly, mutant, backwoods, "kill all the outsiders because they're stupid and deserve it" genre fare. Love it. Love it from the bottom of my mud encrusted Christian Louboutin's to the top of my John Deer Tractor cap. From "The Hills Have Eyes" to "Deliverance" to "Wrong Turn", nothing better (or more American) than a bunch o' city slickers going' places they shouldn't, poking' their noses around and getting' said noses eaten off. It's the best. And "Albino Farm" is another worthy addition in to the white-trash, blood-splattered, inbred-killer horror film lexicon. From the beginning of the story, you are sucked in by wispy, almost dream-like shots circa the 1950's of 2 young boys on their bikes (baseball cards in spokes!)as they peddle through an All-American ma, pa, and apple pie town, turn the corner and head out deep into the neighboring woods. There, we get our first glimpse of the namesake "Albino Farm" and an effective horrific tease of its mysterious legend. Without giving away too much, the film then bounces to modern day where a group of university students, on a mid-term assignment exploring local legends and the roots of myths, are forced off the road by a roadkill-scraping dwarf obviously bent on bringing home some vittles to the kin-folk. A flat tire forces our heroes deeper off the beaten path where they encounter local after disturbingly creepy local – leading them deeper in to the mystery of the farm and finally to the farm itself. As you can see from the premise, there is some unique stuff, counterbalanced with the typical genre doing's we've seen time and time again. And while at times the pacing of the film could be tightened up and there are moments when you can see what's gonna happen next from a Wal-mart-Super-Center-mile-away, there are moments of fresh, exciting and truly invigorating horror to be had… can anyone say (SPOILER!!!), Grandma-church-lady breastfeeding a deformed baby??? Gross, yes! But also super-weird and ridiculously wonderful! While, for the most part, "Albino Farm" is low-budget fare, the effects (by IMP Creations) are realistic, the acting pretty darn good and the story enough to keep one engaged to the bitter (and shockingly surprising and non-clichéd!) end. Chris Jericho (of WWE wrestling fame) and Richard Christy (of the Howard Stern Show "let me put my private part on Sal the Stockbrokers face" fame) turn in inspired performances. But the main four college friends played by Sunkrish Bala, Tammin Sursok, Alicia Lagano and Nick Richey deserve the most credit. They take typical dialog, make it their own and actually make you care (and even like!) these characters. Oh, and Bianca Barnett, who played the oversexed but "careful if you shun me because hell hath no furry like a Pig-Bitch scorned", was hot, hot, HOT!! Makes this girl wanna give up on the non-mutated dating pool and switch to pork, the other white meat for' sure! Definitely fun for Halloween and while it isn't the best of all time, if nothing else, the girls are hot, the blood flows well and there's even a laugh or two in the right place. I give it a mutated, over-sized, deformed, unwashed, Stuckey's, hillbilly thumbs-up. Let's hope there's a sequel as I'm ready to go back in the farm anytime! Ewww-wee, squeal like a pig, girl!!!!!

pretty good quality for a strait to DVD flick

[chaosbaron · 6/10 · 25 April 2010]

Picking this film up you most likely were seeking out a B-horror film such as myself. After reading the back of the case I quickly realized that this film was in the "torture" genre which I do not favor but moved into the movie with optimism. The movie takes a slow approach, building atmosphere with bizarre images, run-ins with the locals, and even takes a stab at a little bit of character development. The gore does not actually begin until a good 40 minutes into the film, which some may consider bad and some good based on their opinion. Even after the gore began I still enjoyed the movie as it did not entirely abandon its atmosphere for blood and guts gross out scenes as many do. This isn't to say there are not some nasty scenes. I was also surprised to not see a single rape or sex scene which is another overly used piece in gore films today, although their are three brief moments of nudity.

The acting and script was impressively tolerable, even believable at times.The characters are as you would expect, extremely typical horror cast of teens, the macho douche, the smart girl, the dumb girl, and the innocent guy. These character arche types can all feel a bit forced. The scenery and towns folk were well set up to fit the eerie desolate atmosphere.

Overall I was pretty impressed with the films quality and kept me entertained the whole way through. You can still expect the usual tripping when the chase scenes begin and the seemingly suicidal stupid decisions as with any B-horror or horror film in general but otherwise this was pretty decent, entertaining, kinda fun. 6/10 overall for Albino Farm from me. Hopefully from this you can make your own decision if it is worth a watch.

Calling All JERICHOLICS!! and Wrong Turn trilogy liker's.

[ThatsGoodInnit · 8/10 · 26 January 2011]

Thats Right Wrestlings Fans, a movie starring WWE legend Chris Jericho!! Not the bloody Rock again or dodgy Triple H! But multi-talented singer and actor Jericho. Im a big fan, and was so-so surprised and chuffed when i saw this movie by chance starring Chris, i had heard very little about it. The Film also stars the gorgeous hot and curvy former actress of Home and Away Tammin Sursok, who is a good actress. The acting in the flick is actually very good! not cheesy. It takes awhile for Chris to appear but once he does, he doesn't disappoint. I like how his character is portrayed, and not what i was expecting it to be. Chris could definitely get away with making more films in particular more horrors! The future looks bright for him.

If you are a fan of the WRONG TURN trilogy, then i would definitely recommend this! they are similar and shouldn't disappoint you! I like the country style redneck style horrors with cannibalistic freaky characters, that are inbreds. They make a good horror. I recommend this.

New Age Horror Flick OK!! but not the best

[rubberduck2500 · 6/10 · 29 July 2010]

For a new age B horror movie this is worth a one time watch. It doesn't make you jump with easily foreseen sounds and noises as much as theater blockbusters. It plays more of a plot line with a interesting and creative story, well placed gore, and interesting miss shaped characters. The plot picks up and the ending is a little too action for a horror film, but plays a good role and adds to the oh my gosh the town is really out there. It keeps you on the edge of your seat as characters are knocked off one by one. The plot was interesting and yet a little sketchy at parts. As if the writer stretched a little bit to make some filler but not too far to ruin the whole thing. The whole town being involve again and again has been used to add the the chill of no where to run. The woods theme and not knowing exactly where you were at added even more to create an unfamiliar and horrifying environment. Again the plot wasn't the best but the still managed to keep me biting my nails till the end.