Married... with Children (TV Series)

Dial 'B' for Virgin (1994)

Christina Applegate: Kelly Bundy

Quotes 

• Bud Bundy : Hello, you're on the Virgin Hotline. This is your counselor, eh... Eugene.

  Kelly Bundy : [On phone]  Hi, my name is Isis J. Blowupdoll, and my boyfriend, Bud, hasn't been able to keep his hands off me ever since I came out of the box. Now, should I try to stay firm or just explode and go to pieces?

  Bud Bundy : Yeah, very funny, Kel, but don't let me keep you. I'm sure the trucker paid for the WHOLE hour.

• Bud Bundy : Well, with self-esteem intact, I'm gonna get ready for my orientation now. Kelly...

  Kelly Bundy : Mm-hmm?

  Bud Bundy : Would you be so kind as to insult me up the stairs, please?

  Kelly Bundy : Mmm. My pleasure. Now, when people call up, do you merely talk them out of sex or do you send them a picture of yourself and scare the pants back on them?

• Bud Bundy : [on the phone]  Virgin Hotline.

  Kelly Bundy : [with a deep voice]  Hi, this is Buck. I'm wearing nothing but my fur. I miss you, Bud. I miss our special times together.

  [pants]