It's a Bird... It's a Plane... It's Superman! (1975 TV Movie)

Kenneth Mars: Max Mencken

Photos 

Quotes 

• [Lois Lane, Dr. Sedgwick and Max Mencken are tied to chairs in a building with a powerful bomb] 

  Superman : I've got to get you out of here, Lois.

  Max Mencken : Well, what about us, Musclebound?

  Superman : Women and children before villains.

• Max Mencken : Why, if it wasn't for that big salami in blue drawers, I'd be #1 in this town!

• Max Mencken : You'll be sorry -- you and your klutz of steel! So long, you super sucker lover!

• Dr. Abner Sedgwick : Max, I think I have found something I've always wanted.

  Max Mencken : What?

  Dr. Abner Sedgwick : My very own henchmen!

• Max Mencken : From now on, there's no stopping Mrs. Mencken's big boy, Max. It's a smile! It's a glow! It's Supermax!

• Max Mencken : That jerk computer's wrong! Wrong!

  Dr. Abner Sedgwick : The computer says it's never wrong.

  [to the computer] 

  Max Mencken : You ever see 2001? You know what happens to smart alec computers?

• Max Mencken : You mean to say that Clark Kent is Superman? I always thought Kent flew a little, but not that way.

• Max Mencken : You said you'd worked out a plan to destroy Superman...

  Dr. Abner Sedgwick : Max, Max, Max, good guys plan. Bad guys scheme!

• Max Mencken : Wow, who would have thought that kindly old Dr. Sedgwick was in reality a mad scientist?

  Dr. Abner Sedgwick : That's strictly off the record, you understand.

  Max Mencken : I won't print a thing.

• Max Mencken : Take a gander at this lead item for my column, Max Mencken's Metropolis.

  Sydney Carlton : You stood me up last night, why should I?

  Max Mencken : Because I'm gorgeous!

• Dr. Abner Sedgwick : The way to destroy Superman is to have Superman destroy himself!

  Max Mencken : You mean to say that Superman would destroy himself?

  Dr. Abner Sedgwick : I mean to say that Superman would destroy himself.

  Max Mencken : Ah, I see. You mean that Superman would destroy himself!

  Dr. Abner Sedgwick : I mean that Superman WOULD destroy himself.

• Max Mencken : Did you ever know I used to be a hoofer, sweetheart? A hoofer!

  Lois Lane : A hoofer, you mean the rear end of a horse act?

  Max Mencken : Hilarious. Dance!

• Max Mencken : Wanna get in on the ground floor, sweetheart, write a book? "My Years With Max Mencken." We could make a fortune!

  Sydney Carlton : I'd like to write a book. You're a subject could really sink my teeth into.

  Max Mencken : Why, a book like that would be the hottest thing between two covers ever!

  Sydney Carlton : Which is more than I can say for the subject.

• Ray Clive : Well, Mr. Mencken, what do you make of this city hall explosion?

  Max Mencken : Well, it exploded. That's for certain. In fact, I don't think there can be any doubt whatever about that. City hall has exploded.

  Ray Clive : I guess you're right.

• Max Mencken : Oh, my fellow Americans, it is at a time like this when I wish I was sitting there in Washington in that oval office. If nominated, I would accept, when elected, I would serve in all humility!