This movie was recommended to me by a friend. I never saw an ad or a trailer, so I didn't know Clooney was in it and was not bothered by the fact that his role was so small. I thought the whole cast was suitable, and found the film pretty enjoyable, all in all. The opening scene, with the small crew of bandits standing at the side of the road, looking whipped and haggard, caught my attention immediately. It had a way of telling you, "don't go away; this won't be boring", and it really wasn't. It turned out to be an interesting, light-hearted comedy with enough twists and turns to keep you in your seat to the very end, but when the ending did arrive, I felt a little bit cheated....just a little bit. The events kept building up so that you expect them to continue building, but at a point that I can't define, it sort of levels out, making the ending a slight disappointment. I reckon I expected a bigger bang of a climax, but it turned out sort of low-key. If you watch the movie with that in mind and you can live without high dosages of George Clooney, you should find this flick very entertaining and well worth watching. Now I'd like to see the original (Big Deal on Madonna Street), but it's probably a rare find in the United States.
97 Reviews
Alan Ford type of comedy
johnny-0818 November 2007
Cosimo (Luis Guzman) ends up in prison for car burglary and there he's given the plan for the perfect heist from a lifer in prison; so he has to get out of jail, fast. He tells his girlfriend Rosalind (Patricia Clarkson) to find a man who will do his time in prison for some money. But no one wants to do the time for Cosimo's crime and yet everybody seems to know a guy who will do that. Soon bad boxer Pero Mahalovic (Sam Rockwell) founds out the details of this so called "perfect job".
First of all, I think this movie was very funny and from my point of view I would recommend it to everyone. This movie is remake of Italian comedy "I Soliti Ignoti". I didn't watch the Italian original so I cannot judge or compare those two movies. But "Welcome to Collinwood" is great comedy for itself, about four people trying to rob the money from the vault in one house. Everyone gave their part of brilliance from this movie cast. Really excellent movie for these actors: Sam Rockwell, William H. Macy (great), Isaiah Washington, Michael Jeter (great), Luis Guzmán, Patricia Clarkson, Jennifer Esposito and finally George Clooney gave their share in this project.
Maybe to say that this movie is only comedy, isn't fair. This is more then that. Because of one difference. All of thieves in this movie have very small wishes when they are asked: what will they do with their money? It is mostly securing their future in very humble way. This fact goes beyond comedy into the soul of that criminals. And not only them but also cop Babitch, who is presented like corrupted one; so here directors Russo presents us fact that criminals and cop are the same. Actually all in Collinwood are; and not only in Collinwood, cause all people chase money, on legal or illegal way. I don't like all movies were audience eventually likes and cheers for thieves. But, this one is exception. You have to love them all. Riley with his little baby and wife in jail. Toto with his pants. Cosimo with his line: "Your mother's a whore!" and all others. They are just like characters in my favorite comic, Alan Ford. They all trying to make some money, but simply they are out of luck. But they all did one good deed: they gave money to Riley, so he can get his wife out of prison. They are all heroes in my eyes, cause lots of "honest" people wouldn't do that.
First of all, I think this movie was very funny and from my point of view I would recommend it to everyone. This movie is remake of Italian comedy "I Soliti Ignoti". I didn't watch the Italian original so I cannot judge or compare those two movies. But "Welcome to Collinwood" is great comedy for itself, about four people trying to rob the money from the vault in one house. Everyone gave their part of brilliance from this movie cast. Really excellent movie for these actors: Sam Rockwell, William H. Macy (great), Isaiah Washington, Michael Jeter (great), Luis Guzmán, Patricia Clarkson, Jennifer Esposito and finally George Clooney gave their share in this project.
Maybe to say that this movie is only comedy, isn't fair. This is more then that. Because of one difference. All of thieves in this movie have very small wishes when they are asked: what will they do with their money? It is mostly securing their future in very humble way. This fact goes beyond comedy into the soul of that criminals. And not only them but also cop Babitch, who is presented like corrupted one; so here directors Russo presents us fact that criminals and cop are the same. Actually all in Collinwood are; and not only in Collinwood, cause all people chase money, on legal or illegal way. I don't like all movies were audience eventually likes and cheers for thieves. But, this one is exception. You have to love them all. Riley with his little baby and wife in jail. Toto with his pants. Cosimo with his line: "Your mother's a whore!" and all others. They are just like characters in my favorite comic, Alan Ford. They all trying to make some money, but simply they are out of luck. But they all did one good deed: they gave money to Riley, so he can get his wife out of prison. They are all heroes in my eyes, cause lots of "honest" people wouldn't do that.
Safe crackers
jotix1005 July 2005
"Welcome to Collingwood" offers some of the most hilarious dialog in recent memory. Watching this comedy directed by the brothers Anthony and Joe Russo reminded us of maybe another film we had seen in the past, but since we missed the opening credits, we had to wait until the end to discover that what we were reminded of, was the 1958 Italian film "Big Deal on Madonna Street", directed by Mario Monicelli.
The Russo brothers put together a magnificent cast to portray all the characters in the film. Anything with William H. Macy, Luis Guzman, Sam Rockwell, Patricia Clarkson, the late Michael Jeter, in it, can't be bad. Since this is an ensemble piece all characters get an opportunity in which to shine.
The film presents us a group of inane would-be safe crackers from hell. No one could think these men could carry on a job like the one they undertake. Whatever could go wrong, and more, is what they succeed in doing. George Clooney makes a small appearance as the master safe cracker who is also seen impersonating a rabbi, only to be confused with a priest by the gang members coming out of Cossimo's funeral.
The best way to enjoy the movie is to sit back and relax, and let all these small time crooks do their thing. Let their funny lines make you laugh, as anyone can see this gang is doomed from beginning to end!
The Russo brothers put together a magnificent cast to portray all the characters in the film. Anything with William H. Macy, Luis Guzman, Sam Rockwell, Patricia Clarkson, the late Michael Jeter, in it, can't be bad. Since this is an ensemble piece all characters get an opportunity in which to shine.
The film presents us a group of inane would-be safe crackers from hell. No one could think these men could carry on a job like the one they undertake. Whatever could go wrong, and more, is what they succeed in doing. George Clooney makes a small appearance as the master safe cracker who is also seen impersonating a rabbi, only to be confused with a priest by the gang members coming out of Cossimo's funeral.
The best way to enjoy the movie is to sit back and relax, and let all these small time crooks do their thing. Let their funny lines make you laugh, as anyone can see this gang is doomed from beginning to end!
Well worth a look - ignore the bad reviews on here!
scarecrow599 February 2004
It takes my breath away to see some of the uptight and/or pretentious "reviews" of this very funny film that are on this site. "No character depth"? "Weak plot"? Is there a class these people take, called "THE POINT, AND HOW TO MISS IT"??? It's just a well-shot, well-written, well-acted slapstick heist film, for goodness sake - and the characters are SUPPOSED to be shallow idiots! It tells you that on the video cover! Were the characters in "Oh Brother, Where Art Thou?" deeply developed? And was that not a GREAT film, or did I miss something? I strongly suggest that anyone who is simply after a good laugh should watch this film, and that those who seek high art in everything they see should either learn to relax a bit, or spare the rest of us their tedious opinions! Sheesh...
Fast, Brainless Fun!
Threepwood_Lives20 September 2003
I had tried to rent this on many occasions, but was always with the girlfriend, who, as a general rule, usually rejects heist flicks and ensemble comedies with the comment "Uhm... looks good, but i'm not in the mood for that movie." Thus entereth the "Almighty Solo Movie Night"!
Anyway, I found Welcome To Collinwood a rather enjoyable movie. While ultimately fairly forgettable, it does have moments of fun and a few laugh out loud moments. I was unfamiliar with the fact that it was a remake, and as a general rule watch movies trying to ignore that fact and watch them on their own merits anyway. George Clooney puts in a humorous and brief cameo as a wheeled safe cracker that, for the most part left me wondering two things... 1. wouldn't every comedy be better if Mr. Clooney put in a strange 5 minute cameo? and 2. How do they make fake tattoos that look old and faded, and how easily do they wash off? The cast, all fine actors in their own right, put in a great job, and you get the impression that they had a good time working together which is fairly important in a movie like this. Needless to say all does not go as planned in this movie, both plot-wise and humor-wise, but it made me check out the special features and consider watching the original, so I consider it a success! Rent this one for a good time, maybe grab a few friends and a pizza. you'll have a good time.
***7/10***
On a side note, the soundtrack is spectacular. It's great to hear the far under appreciated Paolo Conte used, and it left me humming snippets of the score long after the credits rolled.
Anyway, I found Welcome To Collinwood a rather enjoyable movie. While ultimately fairly forgettable, it does have moments of fun and a few laugh out loud moments. I was unfamiliar with the fact that it was a remake, and as a general rule watch movies trying to ignore that fact and watch them on their own merits anyway. George Clooney puts in a humorous and brief cameo as a wheeled safe cracker that, for the most part left me wondering two things... 1. wouldn't every comedy be better if Mr. Clooney put in a strange 5 minute cameo? and 2. How do they make fake tattoos that look old and faded, and how easily do they wash off? The cast, all fine actors in their own right, put in a great job, and you get the impression that they had a good time working together which is fairly important in a movie like this. Needless to say all does not go as planned in this movie, both plot-wise and humor-wise, but it made me check out the special features and consider watching the original, so I consider it a success! Rent this one for a good time, maybe grab a few friends and a pizza. you'll have a good time.
***7/10***
On a side note, the soundtrack is spectacular. It's great to hear the far under appreciated Paolo Conte used, and it left me humming snippets of the score long after the credits rolled.
Underrated comedy heist film
milstar1 March 2013
This is one of those "little great movies" made almost by low key approach and as art film. It tells the story of few guys planning to rob the safe in jewelry store. Each one of them has the same reason for it. Money. One character, Toto, leaves poorly in abandoned hangar, other guy, black man Leon, has a sister who is soon to be married and he needs dough for the wedding. Riley is also very poor, his wife is imprisoned and he leaves alone with his baby and so on... However, whole point of the movie is that robbery they looking to execute is doomed since the beginning. Only characters aren't aware of this issue. Movie reminds a bit of "Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels" in terms of style and setting, but far less violent. Violence happens very rarely or almost never, and when it happens it's played for laughs and when you compare that with running time (86 minutes) you get very lightweight, very easy film. Those two things are only criticism I have. On brighter side, actors did their work tremendously and Sam Rockwell leads. I haven't watched many of his movies, but he is so damn good in this. Very good. Along with George Clooney, who appears in episodic role (3-4 minutes) as safe cracker veteran who teaches our guys how to crack the safe. Of course, it would be unfair if I don't mention late Michael Jetter and Luis Guzman, Patricia Clarkson and Isaiah Washington. Dialogue is well written and locations are realistic. Overall, movie is very enjoyable for anyone who loves crime/black comedy features, except when it ends, it'll leave you wondering why hadn't lasted a bit more.
good laugh
barrie_creamer18 June 2005
Stylish heist movie with a sense of humour and a classy cast including Sam Rockwell and William H. Macy; that's about the long and the short of it really nothing special but definitely not a waste of 90 minutes of your day either.
The boys try to rob a safe because they're all skint. Sam Rockwell has to seduce the girl next door to get into the apartment etc the film quickly tumbles into farce it all goes horribly wrong the various characters crack under pressure at different stages and the gang disintegrates then reassembles with humorous consequences blah blah blah one for a quiet afternoon or early evening bit of a bloke flick I suppose.
The boys try to rob a safe because they're all skint. Sam Rockwell has to seduce the girl next door to get into the apartment etc the film quickly tumbles into farce it all goes horribly wrong the various characters crack under pressure at different stages and the gang disintegrates then reassembles with humorous consequences blah blah blah one for a quiet afternoon or early evening bit of a bloke flick I suppose.
an enjoyable romp from start to finish - eminently entertaining
HelenMary20 August 2013
This film is an enjoyable romp from start to finish, funny, witty and pleasingly entertaining all the way through. All the characters are quirky and caricaturish and genuinely amusing. Whilst it's not typically laugh out loud funny it is definitely chuckle to yourself and giggle out loud.
A stellar ensemble cast including George Clooney, William H Macy, Isiaih Washington, Michael Jeter, Luis Guzman, Patricia Clarkson and headed up - to my mind - by the superb Sam Rockwell do the brilliant script justice and the Direction and overall production of the film I don't think can be faulted although it comes across as fairly low budget.
In a similar vein to O Brother Where Art Thou? (also Clooney) in terms of humour and oftentimes silliness but also with a point, and an unpredictable and surprising turn of events, this story weaves a full circle from opening scene and flash back to how they got there. Not at all Hollywood, just original and wacky really giving the actors room to develop individual characters. Basically a heist film, some small time crooks hear about a "bellini" (not the champagne cocktail) - the big score that will see them right - and it's about how these misfits get it entirely wrong and into more trouble than the score is worth, no doubt. Some incredibly edge of seat crazy scenes, suspenseful and daft, Rockwell really steals the show as Cassanova, criminal mastermind, fixer and - scarily - the brains of the outfit. This film is what cinema is about, reminiscent of older films that were pure entertainment. Some bad language but it isn't gratuitous or out of keeping. Thoroughly enjoyable.
A stellar ensemble cast including George Clooney, William H Macy, Isiaih Washington, Michael Jeter, Luis Guzman, Patricia Clarkson and headed up - to my mind - by the superb Sam Rockwell do the brilliant script justice and the Direction and overall production of the film I don't think can be faulted although it comes across as fairly low budget.
In a similar vein to O Brother Where Art Thou? (also Clooney) in terms of humour and oftentimes silliness but also with a point, and an unpredictable and surprising turn of events, this story weaves a full circle from opening scene and flash back to how they got there. Not at all Hollywood, just original and wacky really giving the actors room to develop individual characters. Basically a heist film, some small time crooks hear about a "bellini" (not the champagne cocktail) - the big score that will see them right - and it's about how these misfits get it entirely wrong and into more trouble than the score is worth, no doubt. Some incredibly edge of seat crazy scenes, suspenseful and daft, Rockwell really steals the show as Cassanova, criminal mastermind, fixer and - scarily - the brains of the outfit. This film is what cinema is about, reminiscent of older films that were pure entertainment. Some bad language but it isn't gratuitous or out of keeping. Thoroughly enjoyable.
enjoyable caper
dug27830 August 2004
These guys are anything but the Usual Suspects! They are a total bunch of likeable oddballs who you want to see get away with it,but they are so hapless that there is very little chance of that.No one is better than William H Macy at portraying the man with a big heart but down on his luck.This is probably his best performance since Fargo.Sam Rockwell played the meathead boxer to perfection,and the rest of the gang were uniformly good also.Luis Guzman brought some great comic relief as Cosimo,and George Clooney stole every scene in his cameo role.The heist scene at the end was absolutely hilarious.
The direction was also spot on by the Russo brothers.There was certainly a Coen brothers feel to the film throughout and it will be interesting to see how they will develop their careers.They have a long way to go to match the Coen's but this is an excellent start and I look forward to their next celluloid outing. ......."Yo mutha's a whore"!
The direction was also spot on by the Russo brothers.There was certainly a Coen brothers feel to the film throughout and it will be interesting to see how they will develop their careers.They have a long way to go to match the Coen's but this is an excellent start and I look forward to their next celluloid outing. ......."Yo mutha's a whore"!
Silly but fun heist film
rosscinema3 January 2004
Warning: Spoilers
This is a remake of a 1958 film called "Big Deal on Madonna Street" and if you have seen that one than you can predict most of what will happen in this version. If you haven't than you might see this as a pretty funny film loaded with unique characters. Story takes place in a Cleveland suburb called Collinwood that is mainly a poor neighborhood with old buildings. A car thief named Cosimo (Luis Guzman) while in the joint hears from an old inmate about a safe in a pawnshop that holds somewhere around 300,000 dollars. Cosimo needs a "Malinski" which means he needs someone to step forward and confess to his crime so that he can get out and try to break into the safe. He tells his girlfriend Rosalind (Patricia Clarkson) who tells Toto (Michael Jeter) and he tells...well, soon many people are involved like Pero (Sam Rockwell), Leon (Isaiah Washington), Riley (William H. Macy) and Basil (Andrew Davoli). Together they want to do the "Bellini" which means a lucrative job and they hire Jerzy (George Clooney) who is an ex-thief and in a wheelchair for 500 dollars and he teaches them how to saw through the safe.
*****SPOILER ALERT*****
Pero has to romance Carmela (Jennifer Esposito) who lives next to the pawnshop and is holding the keys while the owners are out of town so he uses her to find out when the shop will be empty. Once the actual heist is to begin everything that could go wrong, goes wrong!
This film was directed by the Russo brothers Anthony and Joe and they do a good job of showing how run down the area of Collinwood is and the desperation of these assorted characters. Rockwell steals the show as the boxer Pero but not far behind him is Jeter as Toto. The characters in this film are all well drawn and its the characterizations that (For me) are the best thing about this effort. While this doesn't have quite the level of energy that "Ocean's 11" (Also produced by Steven Soderbergh) generates it's still a funny film loaded with rich and colorful characters. Worth a look.
*****SPOILER ALERT*****
Pero has to romance Carmela (Jennifer Esposito) who lives next to the pawnshop and is holding the keys while the owners are out of town so he uses her to find out when the shop will be empty. Once the actual heist is to begin everything that could go wrong, goes wrong!
This film was directed by the Russo brothers Anthony and Joe and they do a good job of showing how run down the area of Collinwood is and the desperation of these assorted characters. Rockwell steals the show as the boxer Pero but not far behind him is Jeter as Toto. The characters in this film are all well drawn and its the characterizations that (For me) are the best thing about this effort. While this doesn't have quite the level of energy that "Ocean's 11" (Also produced by Steven Soderbergh) generates it's still a funny film loaded with rich and colorful characters. Worth a look.
Such a pale, pale imitation of a great film
tobybarlowny7 January 2006
It's a pretty good cast, but the film has nowhere near the grace of the original Italian comedy "Big Deal on Madonna Street" Anyone looking for an entertaining caper film should visit the original. William Macy may be one of our greatest living actors, but here he's put to little use. And his role in the original was played by Marcello Mastroianni, so I sort of feel sorry for him trying to fill those shoes. Might as well try to imitate Bogart or a young De Niro. The art direction is rich and textured but brings nothing to the story, the extra bits they add to the story feel completely unnecessary and the things they take away are missed. Even starting the way they do seems bizarrely gratuitous and takes away from the surprise of the original. Sam Rockwell has his odd and genial charm and Luis Guzman has that odd charisma, but the love story part of the movie just seems clunky and flat. It's too bad nobody has figured out how to make this movie as well as it was first made, but then again it's too bad we live in a culture where we feel like we need to remake amazing things instead of simply learning to savor the originals.
I have a soft spot for this type of heist movie - Verdict 9.5
UniqueParticle24 June 2019
Such a great crime-comedy directed by the legendary Russo brothers that did several of the Avengers/Marvel films! I wish I saw Welcome to Colinwood sooner, thanks to a wonderful friend for recommending it. A great cast: William H. Macy, Sam Rockwell, Michael Jeter R.I.P., Isaiah Washington, George Clooney, and Andy Davoli. This has some silly comedy and badass camera shots; solid fun time!
I Expected Much More From Such a Cast
claudio_carvalho19 November 2004
The car thief Cosimo (Luis Guzmán) is arrested while stealing a car. Once in prison, he shares the cell with a prisoner sentenced to life for killing his wife. The guy shares with him the location of a safe full of money 'prepared' to be easily robbed. Cosimo asks his mate Rosalind (Patricia Clarkson) to find a scapegoat to assume the blame for his crime for US$ 15,000.00 and he shares the secret with her, asking for total secrecy with the information. Rosalind shares the scheme with a bunch of losers and brainless small time crooks, trying to find a person to trade place in jail with Cosimo. The execution of the robbery does not happen as planned due to the lack of skills and intelligence of the group of morons. Yesterday I watched this flick with the expectation of being a great movie. The cast, with names such as William H. Macy, Luis Guzmán, George Clooney, Patricia Clarkson and Sam Rockwell among others, promised a good movie. However, the whole story is practically based on one joke only, being boring in some parts, and I was very disappointed with the performance of such a cast. In the end, 'Welcome to Collinwood' is nothing more than a watchable and forgettable low budget movie. My vote is six.
Title (Brazil): 'Tudo Por um Segredo' (' Everything For a Secret')
Title (Brazil): 'Tudo Por um Segredo' (' Everything For a Secret')
Two directors. Two producers. One script. No hope.
Critical Eye UK25 March 2005
Warning: Spoilers
A couple of good jokes underpin Welcome to Collinwood. The lesser, why anyone ever thought it worth screening. The greater, why anyone should've paid to see it.
Released in the UK on a DVD decorated with tabloid Press endorsements that equate to the yesteryear door-post daubings on the homes of Plague victims (so you enter within at your peril) the wrapper does at least give fair warning of what awaits:
Five thieves. One safe. No brain (front cover)
Eight guys. One safe. No brain (back over).
As that's three characters gone AWOL in the publicity alone, never mind the running time, for what else, by its absence, is Collinwood notable?
Well, er. . . Considering that it's almost a scene by scene remake of a celebrated 50s Italian crime caper, writer / directors the Russo brothers aren't exactly big on original thinking. Watch the DVD extras, and they don't seem that big on, um, thinking, per se: though both burble on about the amount of hard work they found it necessary to invest in creating Collinwood's characters (sic) and plotting Collinwood's narrative arcs (ditto) they neglect to mention what they did for the rest of that afternoon.
Perhaps not surprisingly, it's that same spirit of omission that pervades the movie. Take one of the key scenes, for instance, where Macy's 'character', after having worn a phony plaster caste on an uninjured arm, winds up wearing a real plaster caste on an injured arm, this the result of a revenge beating en route to the safe cracking at the heart of the film.
Irony? Hey. It's a comedy. Laugh? Well maybe, but that's not easy because this scene never actually appears. Macy just, well, sort of, gets a broken arm.
What about George Clooney then, co-producer and lead actor (according to the DVD cover?) No. Not much sign of him either, because self-perceived auteur status aside, Clooney evidently had more to do in life than appear in stuff like this.
So to get around the problem of being a Big Star playing a safe cracker in a movie about safe cracking but who can't actually spend any time doing any of that, Clooney stays in a wheel chair throughout the eight or so minutes of his filming commitment, and is thus conveniently excused from participating in the climactic safe cracking scene. But then, that doesn't feature, either. So actually, Clooney needn't have been in the movie anyway.
Still. It's not difficult to see why he was so anxious to appear. Asked why, in one scene, he is wearing a false beard and a funny hat, Clooney doesn't actually fess up and say 'Because I don't want anyone to know I have any connection with this' but the much wittier: 'You're an idiot'.
Wilde, eat your heart out. Ripostes get no better than that. Well, not in Collinwood anyway, -- 'funniest movie of the year' (Sunday Mirror, UK); 'hilarious' (The Sun, UK), 'top notch performances' (Daily Mirror).
So. Eight guys and a safe and a brain becomes five guys and a safe and a brain. OK. Clooney's out, so that's seven. Who else? Well, the guy who sets it up: run over by a bus, this being in every sense a transport of delight as it prevents him from saying 'your mutha is a f--- whore' for the hundred and seventh time.
Right. Six left, and now it's the turn of the character largely responsible for bringing all the thieves together: he decides the movie's not worth risking his career on sorry, the safe's not worth it, either so exits to start a new life as an exotic dancer in Rio de Janeiro.
All right, all right. He doesn't. He goes off to work in a factory. As a joke, that's much funnier than going off to Rio de Janeiro, unless, of course, you've ever worked in a factory. As far as screen writing goes though, that's like having Michael Caine leaving the original Italian Job to go open a grocer's shop in Oldham.
Characters and scenes are not the only elements to vanish from, rather than being welcomed to, Collinwood. Entire sections of script vaporise, too, most memorably in the case of Isaiah Washington's character, who though introduced by someone else as being 'seriously weird' is from then on the most consistently normal person in the entire proceedings.
Explanation must be that all the weirdness supporting material scenes, dialog, action got left on the bus that ran over the chap who could only say your mutha is a f--- whore 107 times, or alternatively it was all pocketed by the character who ran off to Rio. Correction: to work in a factory.
So. . . Welcome to Collinwood. Two directors. Two producers. One screenplay. No hope.
Rating: 1 out of 10 (the point goes to the late Michael Jeter for at least trying to transcend the material). Plus: 10/10 for the DVD extras: so narcissistic, so infantile, that for a blissful moment you wonder if Chris Guest has arrived. Then realise: nope. These people Clooney, Soderbegh, the Russos, the cast they really do. . . Believe.
Released in the UK on a DVD decorated with tabloid Press endorsements that equate to the yesteryear door-post daubings on the homes of Plague victims (so you enter within at your peril) the wrapper does at least give fair warning of what awaits:
Five thieves. One safe. No brain (front cover)
Eight guys. One safe. No brain (back over).
As that's three characters gone AWOL in the publicity alone, never mind the running time, for what else, by its absence, is Collinwood notable?
Well, er. . . Considering that it's almost a scene by scene remake of a celebrated 50s Italian crime caper, writer / directors the Russo brothers aren't exactly big on original thinking. Watch the DVD extras, and they don't seem that big on, um, thinking, per se: though both burble on about the amount of hard work they found it necessary to invest in creating Collinwood's characters (sic) and plotting Collinwood's narrative arcs (ditto) they neglect to mention what they did for the rest of that afternoon.
Perhaps not surprisingly, it's that same spirit of omission that pervades the movie. Take one of the key scenes, for instance, where Macy's 'character', after having worn a phony plaster caste on an uninjured arm, winds up wearing a real plaster caste on an injured arm, this the result of a revenge beating en route to the safe cracking at the heart of the film.
Irony? Hey. It's a comedy. Laugh? Well maybe, but that's not easy because this scene never actually appears. Macy just, well, sort of, gets a broken arm.
What about George Clooney then, co-producer and lead actor (according to the DVD cover?) No. Not much sign of him either, because self-perceived auteur status aside, Clooney evidently had more to do in life than appear in stuff like this.
So to get around the problem of being a Big Star playing a safe cracker in a movie about safe cracking but who can't actually spend any time doing any of that, Clooney stays in a wheel chair throughout the eight or so minutes of his filming commitment, and is thus conveniently excused from participating in the climactic safe cracking scene. But then, that doesn't feature, either. So actually, Clooney needn't have been in the movie anyway.
Still. It's not difficult to see why he was so anxious to appear. Asked why, in one scene, he is wearing a false beard and a funny hat, Clooney doesn't actually fess up and say 'Because I don't want anyone to know I have any connection with this' but the much wittier: 'You're an idiot'.
Wilde, eat your heart out. Ripostes get no better than that. Well, not in Collinwood anyway, -- 'funniest movie of the year' (Sunday Mirror, UK); 'hilarious' (The Sun, UK), 'top notch performances' (Daily Mirror).
So. Eight guys and a safe and a brain becomes five guys and a safe and a brain. OK. Clooney's out, so that's seven. Who else? Well, the guy who sets it up: run over by a bus, this being in every sense a transport of delight as it prevents him from saying 'your mutha is a f--- whore' for the hundred and seventh time.
Right. Six left, and now it's the turn of the character largely responsible for bringing all the thieves together: he decides the movie's not worth risking his career on sorry, the safe's not worth it, either so exits to start a new life as an exotic dancer in Rio de Janeiro.
All right, all right. He doesn't. He goes off to work in a factory. As a joke, that's much funnier than going off to Rio de Janeiro, unless, of course, you've ever worked in a factory. As far as screen writing goes though, that's like having Michael Caine leaving the original Italian Job to go open a grocer's shop in Oldham.
Characters and scenes are not the only elements to vanish from, rather than being welcomed to, Collinwood. Entire sections of script vaporise, too, most memorably in the case of Isaiah Washington's character, who though introduced by someone else as being 'seriously weird' is from then on the most consistently normal person in the entire proceedings.
Explanation must be that all the weirdness supporting material scenes, dialog, action got left on the bus that ran over the chap who could only say your mutha is a f--- whore 107 times, or alternatively it was all pocketed by the character who ran off to Rio. Correction: to work in a factory.
So. . . Welcome to Collinwood. Two directors. Two producers. One screenplay. No hope.
Rating: 1 out of 10 (the point goes to the late Michael Jeter for at least trying to transcend the material). Plus: 10/10 for the DVD extras: so narcissistic, so infantile, that for a blissful moment you wonder if Chris Guest has arrived. Then realise: nope. These people Clooney, Soderbegh, the Russos, the cast they really do. . . Believe.
Slight but fun
bob the moo22 April 2003
Picked up on grand theft auto, Cosimo is told of a big job by a lifer. Cosimo goes to his friend Toto to help get a guy to do his jail time for him so he can do the job. After asking around Toto comes up with Pero. However Pero double-crosses Cosimo and leaves him in jail and sets up the group to do the job without him. After they enlist the help of expert safe cracker Jerzy the group start putting down the foundations for a job that has all the hallmarks of disaster.
I went to see this with the usual blaze of hype that goes with any movie, the usual OTT quotes from the hacks etc. I didn't expect too much so it was a pleasant surprise. The plot is quite enjoyable and is enlivened by a witty (but not hilarious) script. The comedy of the actual job is great and delivered well. However I will stress that anyone who goes along with the words of Jonathon Ross (`I haven't laughed so hard in years') will probably be disappointed as it isn't a laugh a second.
The strength of the film is in the strong cast. There is no real star (although it will be sold on Clooney) and everyone carries the story and the humour. Macy is good, Rockwell is funny as always, Clooney has a good cameo, Washington is solid enough but I prefer Esposito when she uses her normal voice. Gabrielle Union has a very small part but manages to be very seductive in the first of her two scenes she is clearly going to be bigger in the next few years or so. For me the star of the film is Michael Jeter. It's such a shame that he died not even a month ago but this is a good film to follow his loss with. He makes many of the laughs with his pathetic yet endearing old man. In some scenes he makes laughs out of nothing and his performance is pitch perfect.
On the whole I was tickled by this film and that was enough for me. Many will be let down as they have been told it is a laugh riot. If you go in just expecting a bit of fun with good actors then that is what you'll get. It's very slight but it is amusing enough to justify watching.
I went to see this with the usual blaze of hype that goes with any movie, the usual OTT quotes from the hacks etc. I didn't expect too much so it was a pleasant surprise. The plot is quite enjoyable and is enlivened by a witty (but not hilarious) script. The comedy of the actual job is great and delivered well. However I will stress that anyone who goes along with the words of Jonathon Ross (`I haven't laughed so hard in years') will probably be disappointed as it isn't a laugh a second.
The strength of the film is in the strong cast. There is no real star (although it will be sold on Clooney) and everyone carries the story and the humour. Macy is good, Rockwell is funny as always, Clooney has a good cameo, Washington is solid enough but I prefer Esposito when she uses her normal voice. Gabrielle Union has a very small part but manages to be very seductive in the first of her two scenes she is clearly going to be bigger in the next few years or so. For me the star of the film is Michael Jeter. It's such a shame that he died not even a month ago but this is a good film to follow his loss with. He makes many of the laughs with his pathetic yet endearing old man. In some scenes he makes laughs out of nothing and his performance is pitch perfect.
On the whole I was tickled by this film and that was enough for me. Many will be let down as they have been told it is a laugh riot. If you go in just expecting a bit of fun with good actors then that is what you'll get. It's very slight but it is amusing enough to justify watching.
So this is how Sam Rockwell and George Clooney met.
Boba_Fett113820 April 2008
Before George Clooney directed Sam Rockwell in his directorial debut "Confessions of a Dangerous Mind", they starred together in this movie. George Clooney also was involved with this movie as a producer, along with Steven Soderbergh, which shows that they really believed in this project. In potential this also seems like a fine and entertaining project, that is in the same line with movie-remakes such as "Ocean's Eleven" and "The Italian Job" but somehow this movie is only halve successful, or at least it isn't as good as it could had been.
The movie its characters are all being played by some fine well known actors but a shame is that the characters are not really given enough room to develop. Even though in their potential they could had turned into fun and enjoyable characters, they are now only characters that mildly entertain because mostly of some of the more quirky sequences that are in the movie. The fact that they are being played doesn't change much to this, even though they prevent their characters from ever becoming a total bore or perhaps even annoying, or anything like that at all.
It's of course due to the writing that the characters aren't used to their full potential. I can only assume that the original Italian movie "I Soliti ignoti" works out much better than this movie does. The movie relies too much on its simple story and predictable way of storytelling.
Nevertheless the movie is simply still a very fun one to watch maybe because of that very same simplicity. It's an harmless little caper movie, in which you simply shouldn't to worry much about the story. In that regard "Welcome to Collinwood" is still a movie that works out and simply serves its purpose well.
It's a movie that you won't regret watching once you've finished it but it also is a movie you can really easily do without ever seeing.
7/10
http://bobafett1138.blogspot.com/
The movie its characters are all being played by some fine well known actors but a shame is that the characters are not really given enough room to develop. Even though in their potential they could had turned into fun and enjoyable characters, they are now only characters that mildly entertain because mostly of some of the more quirky sequences that are in the movie. The fact that they are being played doesn't change much to this, even though they prevent their characters from ever becoming a total bore or perhaps even annoying, or anything like that at all.
It's of course due to the writing that the characters aren't used to their full potential. I can only assume that the original Italian movie "I Soliti ignoti" works out much better than this movie does. The movie relies too much on its simple story and predictable way of storytelling.
Nevertheless the movie is simply still a very fun one to watch maybe because of that very same simplicity. It's an harmless little caper movie, in which you simply shouldn't to worry much about the story. In that regard "Welcome to Collinwood" is still a movie that works out and simply serves its purpose well.
It's a movie that you won't regret watching once you've finished it but it also is a movie you can really easily do without ever seeing.
7/10
http://bobafett1138.blogspot.com/
A Waste of Great Talent
jwinters-214 October 2002
This should have been a great movie. Instead it lacked any coherence any originality and a failure to take advantage of the incredible talent. Despite the absence of any great lines, the acting was superb. I laughed exactly four times. Sad.
WHAT IS GOING ON WITH HOLLYWOOD
Mizz_dynamitee12 October 2003
First I had to sit through the Italian Job with patience trying my best not to let the Hollywoodised version get to me.. (I thought it was crap), then there was the ring... and the ruthless hollywoodised version of that.. now there is welcome to collinwood.. another European film that is a classic for Italian cinema... (what got to me most was that there is only one phrase at the end of the credits that quotes the original title of the film)
Oooh I know.. why dont they try "the wicker man" that will be a good seller too...
Hollywood sux... I can see an ENRON 2 on its way....
Oooh I know.. why dont they try "the wicker man" that will be a good seller too...
Hollywood sux... I can see an ENRON 2 on its way....
good crime comedy
statenisland81227 June 2009
This is a goofy crime comedy. Kinda Cohen Brother's-esquire and gritty but yet original and kinda light.
This is a great ensemble and character piece. The casting is very good. Rockwell gives an excellent performer. Luis Guzmon also delivers very well. Clooney's cameo is a plus and he seems to embody his character well. Also, the Russo Brothers do a fantastic job with the direction here.
The plot is about a group of stupid criminals trying to rob a vault from an apartment. Sam Rockwell has to charm and will over the girl next door to get into the apartment. Welcome To Collinwood soon turns into a situation with everything going to shambles. The characters crack under pressure and things fall apart with humorous results. This is a underrated film and worth the rental!
This is a great ensemble and character piece. The casting is very good. Rockwell gives an excellent performer. Luis Guzmon also delivers very well. Clooney's cameo is a plus and he seems to embody his character well. Also, the Russo Brothers do a fantastic job with the direction here.
The plot is about a group of stupid criminals trying to rob a vault from an apartment. Sam Rockwell has to charm and will over the girl next door to get into the apartment. Welcome To Collinwood soon turns into a situation with everything going to shambles. The characters crack under pressure and things fall apart with humorous results. This is a underrated film and worth the rental!
Completely Surprised
CherryDarling18012 November 2005
The main reason I wanted to see this movie was because of the wonderful cast. A ton of my favorite actors in one movie equals amazing with out actually seeing it. But this movie caught me off guard. It wasn't what I was expecting at all. It's been a while since I've seen it but I do remember I could not stop laughing!!! And it wasn't just the cast that did it for me. The script was amazingly written. Every time you were expecting something to happen it didn't happen. There were so many twists and turns but it fit with the whole tone of the movie instead of coming off as pretentious. The cinematography, along with the set, was absolutely beautiful as well. I really can't say anything bad about this movie! Expcept, I would have Andrew Davoli a little more screen time!
The Gang That Couldn't Think Straight
=G=22 March 2003
"Welcome to Collinwood" is just another in a long line of flicks about a bunch of people after a bunch of money. An uninspired, lackluster film with a good cast of character actors playing a motley bunch of hoodlums, "...Collinwood" relies on the kookiness of its characters and the quirkiness of its messy plot for comedy. With no drama, romance, action, suspense, titillators, etc. and a simple minded make-it-up-as-you-go storyline, "...Collinwood" is a marginal watch which is best saved for broadcast. (C+)
Oy Vey
fixyourcat25 February 2006
"Welcome to Collinwood" is kind of a disaster. Considering the people involved, it should've been multiple times better.
Watching it, if you're at least somewhat attached to the faith that it'll get better, will probably make you cry. It's one of those movies that had potential, but was robbed of this potential thanks to a terrible script and some bad acting, not to mention the strangely annoying and unnecessary George Clooney character and the guy who reminds me of Richard Dreyfuss but about whom I care so little that I don't even want to know his name.
The film's only saving grace is the weird con vocabulary it introduces. I found myself thinking of it time and time again as I watched more crime capers. This is the only reason I gave the film a 3. The plot is boring, the characters are neurotic, needlessly offensive, and highly unlikable. They are in a constant state of agonizing stress and they're all so irritating that I celebrated their obstacles. They yell at each other and swear crassly. The dialogue is insipid at best and insultingly stupid at its low points.
I find that Steven "Traffic" Soderbergherabracadabrablahblah and George Clooney are to blame for this. They should be tried for war crimes, if anyone actually remembers this crap long enough to care.
Watching it, if you're at least somewhat attached to the faith that it'll get better, will probably make you cry. It's one of those movies that had potential, but was robbed of this potential thanks to a terrible script and some bad acting, not to mention the strangely annoying and unnecessary George Clooney character and the guy who reminds me of Richard Dreyfuss but about whom I care so little that I don't even want to know his name.
The film's only saving grace is the weird con vocabulary it introduces. I found myself thinking of it time and time again as I watched more crime capers. This is the only reason I gave the film a 3. The plot is boring, the characters are neurotic, needlessly offensive, and highly unlikable. They are in a constant state of agonizing stress and they're all so irritating that I celebrated their obstacles. They yell at each other and swear crassly. The dialogue is insipid at best and insultingly stupid at its low points.
I find that Steven "Traffic" Soderbergherabracadabrablahblah and George Clooney are to blame for this. They should be tried for war crimes, if anyone actually remembers this crap long enough to care.
Oddball heist film with quirky characters and big laughs at the end
oldmoviebuff19857 January 2007
I had never heard of this flick despite the connection to George Clooney (whose company produced and he appears in a very funny supporting bit) and his Ocean's 11 director Steven Soderbergh. Worse, we picked this up in a discount bin for $4.99 (Canadian dollars at that!) What a grand and pleasant surprise. But then I'm of the opinion that if William H. Macy is in it you can't be disappointed. This was very reminiscent of those Ealing comedies from England in the 1950s. OK, with more profanity. This is an oddball and at times gut-splittingly funny film. The actual heist made me laugh so hard I was crying. Perhaps the funniest use of underpants in movie history. Maybe it was the low expectations I had going in but I watched with a group of people and we had a blast. Best $5 I've spent in ages.
I'm from Cleveland and I think it's terrible.
jpozenel22 June 2003
I thought I'd see what the movie was all about. My mother was from Collinwood and graduated from Collinwood high school in the early 40's. I thought it might be about that time period, but it's not from any time period in particular (as stated in the movie).
The movie is really bad for the most part. You might get a laugh here or there, but it's like watching an old 3 Stooges comedy, that will also make you laugh at the same stunt that you've seen a thousand times before. I'm sure you'll know when it's coming in this movie as well. The acting seemed very uneven. The script? Was there a script?
I gave it one star.
The movie is really bad for the most part. You might get a laugh here or there, but it's like watching an old 3 Stooges comedy, that will also make you laugh at the same stunt that you've seen a thousand times before. I'm sure you'll know when it's coming in this movie as well. The acting seemed very uneven. The script? Was there a script?
I gave it one star.
Very funny, well made remake of the 50s Italian film.
alexthehamlin21 October 2004
This is one of those few great films that comes out these days. I work at a movie theater, and every week I see countless pieces of crap, and so it's great to see a good one come along every once in a while. The film is about a bunch of broke small-time criminals who hear of a job that could make them rich beyond their dreams. The film follows the obstacles they have to overcome, such as how to get in, crack the safe, etc. George Clooney plays a very funny small part as a handicapped ex-criminal, who tries to show the guys the ropes. Other good actors are Sam Rockwell, William H. Macy and Luis Guzman. (Luis Guzman must have a fantastic agent, he's always in these great movies.) I've never heard of these Russo guys before this movie, but I look forward to their future projects!
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