| Nicole Appleton | ... | Gerry Chase | |
| Natalie Appleton | ... | Mandy Chase | |
| Melanie Blatt | ... | Jo Chase | |
| Derek Deadman | ... | Night Watchman | |
| Graham Fletcher-Cook | ... | Market Trader | |
| Vinny Reed | ... | Stills Photographer | |
| Karina Iszatt | ... | Body Painted Girl | |
| Peter Facinelli | ... | Daniel Wheaton | |
| Rick Warden | ... | Baz | |
| Jonathan Cake | ... | Andrew Pryce-Stevens | |
| Willie Ross | ... | Woodbine | |
| Annette Badland | ... | Rose | |
| Corin Redgrave | ... | Duggie Ord | |
| Matt Bardock | ... | Cedric | |
| Paul Rider | ... | Mo | |
| Sam Kelly | ... | Uncle Sid Gallin | |
| James Cosmo | ... | Tommy Chase | |
| Renata Habelinkova | ... | Bodypainted Girl (as Renata L'Abetinkoua) | |
| Tony Maudsley | ... | Chopper | |
| Lynn Ferguson | ... | Loretta | |
| Bobby Bluebell | ... | Terry the Tripps | |
| Declan Conlon | ... | Eddie | |
| John Pearson | ... | Mechanic | |
| Jayne Ashbourne | ... | Nadja | |
| Helen Slaymaker | ... | Marianne | |
| Ferdy Roberts | ... | Jake | |
| The Sires | ... | 1st Band On Stage at Tripps Festival | |
| Deepak Chopra | ... | Poetry Reader | |
| Sean Gilder | ... | The Hawk | |
| Mark Healy | ... | Waiter | |
| Bill Mannix | ... | MC at Ballroom Dance | |
| Bootsy Collins | ... | Band #2 Inside Tripps Festival | |
| Steve Lewinson | ... | Band #2 Inside Tripps Festival | |
| Pete Lewinson | ... | Band #2 Inside Tripps Festival | |
| Ross Gurney-Randall | ... | Man Counting money in club | |
| Susannah Fellows | ... | Birdie Wheaton | |
| Rolf Saxon | ... | Alden Wheaton | |
| Chrissie Cotterill | ... | June Ord | |
| Grant Russell | ... | Cop | |
| Heathcote Williams | ... | Professor | |
| Charlotte Roach | ... | Desk Nurse | |
| Paul Corrigan | ... | Uniformed Cop | |
| Robert Vahey | ... | Munton | |
| Graham Seed | ... | Pseud in Art Gallery | |
| Georgina Sowerby | ... | Woman in Art Gallery | |
| Sam | ... | Child at Campsite | |
| Django | ... | Child at Campsite | |
| Rory | ... | Child at Campsite | |
| Marc Crealmann | ... | Bugs | |
| rest of cast listed alphabetically: | |||
| Heather Carter-Drake | |||
| Louise Hodges | ... | Hippie (uncredited) | |
| João Costa Menezes | ... | Hippie (uncredited) | |
Directed by | |||
| David A. Stewart | |||
Writing credits(in alphabetical order) | ||
| Dick Clement | ||
| Ian La Frenais | ||
| David A. Stewart | ||
| Karen Lee Street | ||
Produced by | |||
| Dick Clement | .... | co-executive producer | |
| Eileen Gregory | .... | producer | |
| Ian La Frenais | .... | co-executive producer | |
| Keith Northrop | .... | executive producer | |
| Tim Palmer | .... | associate producer | |
| Michael Peyser | .... | producer | |
| Paul Sarony | .... | line producer | |
Original Music by | |||
| David A. Stewart | |||
Cinematography by | |||
| David Johnson | |||
Film Editing by | |||
| David Martin | |||
Casting by | |||
| Karen Lindsay-Stewart | |||
Production Design by | |||
| Michael Pickwoad | |||
Art Direction by | |||
| Henry Harris | |||
Costume Design by | |||
| Mary-Jane Reyner | |||
Makeup Department | |||
| Alison Elliott | .... | makeup artist (as Alison Davies) | |
| Pamela Haddock | .... | hair designer | |
| Pamela Haddock | .... | makeup designer | |
| Paula Price | .... | hair stylist | |
Production Management | |||
| Kora McNulty-Klimov | .... | production manager (as Kora J. McNulty) | |
Art Department | |||
| Charles Burman | .... | scenic artist | |
| David Fyson | .... | production buyer | |
| Tyrone Reed | .... | stagehand | |
| Tony Rycyk | .... | stand-by props | |
Sound Department | |||
| Ben Barker | .... | foley editor | |
| Keith Batten | .... | boom operator | |
| Alistair Crocker | .... | sound | |
| Gillian Dodders | .... | adr editor | |
| Gillian Dodders | .... | dialogue editor | |
| Matthew Gough | .... | co-sound mixer | |
| Matthew Gough | .... | sound assistant | |
| Nigel Mills | .... | supervising sound editor | |
| Mike Prestwood Smith | .... | sound re-recording mixer | |
| Alastair Widgery | .... | sound mixer: second unit | |
Special Effects by | |||
| Tom Harris | .... | special effects supervisor | |
Visual Effects by | |||
| Craig Chandler | .... | visual effects producer | |
| Paul Lambert | .... | composite designer | |
| Clare Norman | .... | visual effects coordinator: Cinesite (uncredited) | |
Stunts | |||
| Amanda Foster | .... | stunt performer | |
| Andreas Petrides | .... | stunt coordinator | |
| Nick Powell | .... | stunt coordinator | |
Casting Department | |||
| Tony Froude | .... | extras casting | |
Costume and Wardrobe Department | |||
| Leigh Nicol | .... | wardrobe assistant | |
| Nicole Young | .... | assistant costume designer | |
Editorial Department | |||
| Hattie Dalton | .... | first assistant editor | |
Music Department | |||
| Simon Changer | .... | score assistant engineer | |
| Bootsy Collins | .... | musician: drums | |
| Matthias Gohl | .... | conductor (as Teese Gohl) | |
| Matthias Gohl | .... | music producer (as Teese Gohl) | |
| Matthias Gohl | .... | musician: keyboards (as Teese Gohl) | |
| Matthias Gohl | .... | orchestrator (as Teese Gohl) | |
| Stephen McLaughlin | .... | music mixer (as Steve McLaughlin) | |
| Stephen McLaughlin | .... | music producer | |
| Stephen McLaughlin | .... | music programmer (as Steve McLaughlin) | |
| Stephen McLaughlin | .... | music recordist (as Steve McLaughlin) | |
| Stephen McLaughlin | .... | musician: drums (as Steve McLaughlin) | |
| David A. Stewart | .... | musician: guitar | |
Other crew | |||
| Mark Beaumont | .... | production accountant | |
| David Broder | .... | location manager | |
| Laragh Cresswell | .... | production secretary | |
| Karen Fayerty | .... | unit nurse | |
| Laura Gwynne | .... | continuity: second unit | |
| Joel Holmes | .... | assistant location manager | |
| Samantha-Jane Hunt | .... | stand-in | |
| Claire L. Kenny | .... | account assistant | |
| Richard Morrison | .... | title designer | |
| Bobby Prince | .... | security manager | |
| Helen Slaymaker | .... | stand-in | |
| Camilla Stephenson | .... | location assistant | |
| Mel Churcher | .... | acting coach: pre-production (uncredited) | |
| Michael J. Harker | .... | completion bond representative (uncredited) | |
| Dean Wares | .... | title typography (uncredited) | |
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| Intermission | Regular Lovers | Beautiful People | The Wisdom of Crocodiles | Personal Velocity: Three Portraits |
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IMDb User Rating: |
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| Full cast and crew | Company credits | External reviews |
| News articles | IMDb Comedy section | IMDb UK section |
To give you an idea of how utterly dull and lifeless this movie is, I will tell you now that the last word of this review is going to be the film title used in a humorous and non too obvious fashion. OK?
So, to the film. Some films do exist that make Brian De Palma's Mission to Mars look like a masterpiece....... I have yet to see one yet and this doesn't even come close. Even though it is awful. And by awful I mean dull, lifeless, cricket, dire, boring. Dave Stewart, as the guitarist and co songwriter has had to put up with Annie Lennox for a good 2 decades so lets not be too hard on him, the film does have its moments. They cost 90p each on a £3.60 ticket. (Or about $1.25 in America on a $5 ticket.) Yes, two of the girls appear topless in the film and while this is no bad thing, I can't see them being given another movie anytime soon.
Mel Blatt is good in the film. She appears natural to this business we call SHOW. Nicole also has her moments (90p remember). Natalie however, the eldest of the two sisters isn't that great in the film. In fact, I'm being kind. A blind monkey with a badger strapped round it's head could have pulled a better performance. Reminiscent of an early Turtletaub or a late Howard.
Unfortunately, the casting is where the movie fails. While 66% of the All Saints are good in this film, 33% aren't. A better idea would have been to cast 3 of the S Club 7 girls in it (Tina obviously getting the boot). Because S Club 7 exist in farce, their cheeky smiles and mischievous ways would have blended perfectly with the Honest backdrop of Cockney England.
Anyway, in conclusion, I can't really recommend this film enough. 90p a nip is a bargain in today's climate. I just feel that S Club 7 would have made a far superior film to the one that we were given. Honest.