Gensomaden Saiyuki (2000–2001)

David Matranga: Sanzo

Quotes 

• Sha Gojyo : [cracks open a beer and takes a swig]  Goddamn it, this one's hot. Goku, get me another beer.

  Goku : Get your own beer, jerkoff!

  Sha Gojyo : Okay, you're gonna get me another beer or I'm gonna take this can and shove it up your whiney little ass! You got that?

  Goku : You just try and see what happens, ya shithead!

  Sha Gojyo : Oh, yeah?

  Goku : You're just looking for an excuse to touch my ass, aren't you?

  Genjo Sanzo : [sighs]  Please ...

  Sha Gojyo : You little fag! Don't project your fantasies on me!

  Goku : All right, that's it! Pull over, I'm taking him out!

  Genjo Sanzo : Your little unrequited love affair is starting to get on my nerves! Get a room!

  [Gojyo and Goku fall silent] 

  Cho Hakkai : Good move there, uh, Sanzo.

  Genjo Sanzo : I thought so, thanks.

  Cho Hakkai : Oh, my, awful quiet back there guys. Are you two making out?

  Sha Gojyo : Shut up, Hakkai.

  Goku : Yeah, shut up.

• Genjo Sanzo : Embrace nothing. If you meet the Buddha, kill the Buddha. If you meet your father, kill your father. Only live your life as it is, not bound to anything.

• Genjo Sanzo : He gave me something that day. Something I wanted to protect. And when it was taken from me, I learned how small I was. I vowed never again to care for someone so much, I couldn't bear to lose them.

• Genjo Sanzo : Damnit! Monkey, go buy me a pack of Cigarettes.

• Sha Gojyo : Stupid monkey, get your own food.

  Goku : Leave me alone, you pervy water sprit!

  Genjo Sanzo : [pulls out gun and start shoting]  Will you both shut the hell up?

• Goku : The hotel's booked, preacher-man. But I had the foresight to book a couple of vacant singles, so you can say thank you now.

  Genjo Sanzo : Thank you now.

• Genjo Sanzo : I'm sorry, I can't concentrate. Not with those two morons in the back.

  Cho Hakkai : [happily]  I'm trying to ignore them!

  Genjo Sanzo : Really? How's it going?

  Cho Hakkai : Not so good.

• Genjo Sanzo : And you're not all that bright either. Take away another forty-five.

  Goku : Nice shot.

  Cho Hakkai : With that many points, he's definitely out of the game.

• Genjo Sanzo : Everybody becomes closer to Buddha when they stop breathing. It's harder to be close while you still are.

• Genjo Sanzo : You jerks damage my reputation daily.

• Genjo Sanzo : I don't think I like them.

  Goku : That isn't good.

• Homura : So you see, it's not so easy to kill gods.

  Genjo Sanzo : Huh. How very god-like of you. Wow. To demonstrate your great power, then expect us to hand over the scriptures to you.

  Homura : Why don't you kneel, kneel before me now.

  Genjo Sanzo : No, thank you.

  [fires a shot at Homrua's head] 

• [three shots fire] 

  Genjo Sanzo : Will you two shut up? Do you wanna die?

  [three more shots fire] 

  Genjo Sanzo : Now if you are quite finished, will you sit down?

  Goku : But, Sanzo!

  Sha Gojyo : This monkey...

  Genjo Sanzo : Shut up!

  Resturaunt Patron : Hey, isn't that a monk's robe he's got on?

• Goku : But there are still some spring rolls left!

  Sha Gojyo : Beer!

  Cho Hakkai : Yes, yes, I know. But if we don't hurry, Sanzo really will shoot us.

  Goku : Spring rolls!

  Sha Gojyo : Beer!

  Genjo Sanzo : Slowpokes!

  [fires two shots] 

• Hotel Clerk : I know, I have an idea. How about I lay a bunch of blankets on the floor for you guys and you can all sleep together.

  Genjo Sanzo , Sha Gojyo , Goku , Cho Hakkai : Sleep together?

• Konzen Douji : I forgot who it was who said monotony could kill a man. Someone from the lower world, I believe. But here death doesn't even exist. Your brain melts away at room temperature for eternity.

• Sha Gojyo : Well, it sure does look like Sanzo needs some anger management.

  Genjo Sanzo : If you don't move your ass I'll show you anger management.

• Cho Hakkai : It's such an eerie feeling, though. How he actually seems to anticipate our every move.

  Genjo Sanzo : That's not hard with these two.

  Sha Gojyo , Goku : What did you say?

• Sha Gojyo : Hey, Sanzo!

  Genjo Sanzo : Hm?

  Sha Gojyo : Lend me a smoke, will ya?

  Genjo Sanzo : No way.

  Sha Gojyo : Don't be a Scrooge! I gotta have my fix, man!

  Genjo Sanzo : If memory serves me correctly, I seem to recall someone saying my smokes tasted like shit.

  Sha Gojyo : I need nicotine right now. Cough 'em up!

  Genjo Sanzo : Let go of me, that is if you wanna live, you red-haired fairy.

  Sha Gojyo : [screams]  I need nicotine!

• Sha Gojyo : I'll be damned. He's sleeping with eyes open.

  [grabs Goku and starts shaking him] 

  Sha Gojyo : That's just too goddamned creepy!

  Genjo Sanzo : Shut up or I'll kill you!

  Cho Hakkai : That's too weird. Sanzo shouts in his sleep.

• Goku : That lady called Hakkai Gonou. I wonder, that means they were school makes or something!

  Sha Gojyo : You can be so naive sometimes, Goku. They were a little more that that. I think ol' one eye was getting some nun action, if you ...

  Genjo Sanzo : Enough!

  [smacks Goku and Gojyo with his fan] 

  Genjo Sanzo : If you want something to speculate about, why don't you figure out where we're going to sleep tonight?

• Genjo Sanzo : So now we're stealing from monkeys. That's so pathetic.

• Genjo Sanzo : I wish that stupid monkey would just shut the hell up.

  Sha Gojyo : Whoo-hee, he's giving me a pounding headache.

  Cho Hakkai : Hey, come one, bring on the booze!

  Sha Gojyo : Come to think of it, I've never actually seen Hakkai drunk before.

  Cho Hakkai : We might have underestimated him.

• Eldest Fei Brother : What's wrong, Goldilocks? You look woozy. That all you got?

  [pauses] 

  Eldest Fei Brother : I didn't hurt your feelings, did I, pretty boy?

  Genjo Sanzo : Heh, heh, heh, heh ...

  Cho Hakkai : S-Sanzo?

  Genjo Sanzo : You dumb bastard. You actually have the gall to mock me, do you? Maten ...

  Cho Hakkai : [clamps his hand over Sanzo's mouth]  Please! Don't you think unleashing a scripture that controls heaven and earth is a little severe?

• Koumyou Sanzo , Genjo Sanzo : Consume wine, don't let the wine consume you.

• Goku : Your hair, it looks just like the sun.

  Konzen Douji : The sun?

• [Goku pulls Konzen's hair, pulling out several strands] 

  Goku : [sheepish smile]  Sorry.

  Konzen Douji : What the hell did you do that for, ya damn monkey? Don't you know who I am?

  [starts beating up Goku] 

  Goku : Ah! I didn't mean to! I said I was sorry!

• Merciful Goddess : Egan, he's so charming and they get along so well, don't you think? I think we'll keep him

  [pauses] 

  Merciful Goddess : with us here.

  Jiroushin : What in the name of the heavens are you saying, Merciful Goddess? You've never kept so much as a houseplant without killing it!

  Merciful Goddess : Silence! Did I say *I* was going to keep him?

  Jiroushin : Huh?

  Merciful Goddess : He shall remain in the care of my nephew, Konzen.

  Konzen Douji : Huh? Why you worthless old hag!

  Merciful Goddess : This is the Merciful Goddess's mandate. Now go have fun with your new pet. Go on, run along.

  [to herself] 

  Merciful Goddess : Hair like the sun. What a truly perfect pick up line. The sun.

• Konzen Douji : Merciful, my ass! She's dumping all her problems on me!

• Konzen Douji : That damn monkey's nothing but a constant distraction. Assign him to someone else, will you please?

  Merciful Goddess : When you're having so much fun?

  Konzen Douji : Don't you have anything better to do than torture me?

  Merciful Goddess : And you make much a wonderful daddy.

  Konzen Douji : Real funny.

• Sha Gojyo : Yeah, Sanzo, have you seen her?

  Genjo Sanzo : Why are you asking me?

  Sha Gojyo : Well, she is your play pal, isn't she?

  Genjo Sanzo : [puts the barrel of the banishing gun under Gojyo's chin]  Please continue.

  Sha Gojyo : Mommy.

• Genjo Sanzo : Tell me, why is this brat still around?

  Cho Hakkai : Put down the gun.

  Yaone : Since we were here, I figured we would enjoy the festival.

• Genjo Sanzo : People die when they die.

• Konzen Douji : I'll be, so the chimp can read, can he?

• Konzen Douji : Tell me, are you and Kenren sharing the same stylist?

  Field Marshal Tenpou : Yes, and I think the fashion is bound to catch on eventually!

  General Kenren : Don't I look more rugged?

• Sha Gojyo : Holy shit, they're gods.

  Genjo Sanzo : I really hate these guys.

• Genjo Sanzo : Don't expect me to chant any sutras for you if you croak.

  Sha Gojyo : Yes, sir. I'd sure hate for you to put yourself out, or anything.

• Genjo Sanzo : Monkeys need to be trained.

• Genjo Sanzo : He gave me something that day. Something I wanted to protect. And when it was taken from me, I learned how small I was. I vowed never again to care for someone so much, I could bear to lose them.

• Genjo Sanzo : I 'm not the world's biggest fan, no.

• Cho Hakkai : Okay, I'll stay. But I want you to know that I reserve the right to walk at any time I deem fit.

  Genjo Sanzo : Just take me with you.

• Genjo Sanzo : I'm crashing. Anyone wakes me up, cut their nuts off.

  Cho Hakkai : [short laugh]  Go to sleep.

• Cho Hakkai : When they get like this, I usually just like to go to my own happy place.

  Genjo Sanzo : Are you really able to tune them out?

  Cho Hakkai : Mmmm, nope.

• Lirin : [assessing the enemy from Sanzo's shoulders]  Oh what's the big deal? I kicked this guy's ass with no problem.

  Genjo Sanzo : Listen ...

  Lirin : Okay.

  Genjo Sanzo : What do you think you're doing?

  Lirin : I'm sitting.

  Genjo Sanzo : Get off.

  Lirin : Weanie.

  Genjo Sanzo : Oh boy are you gonna get it.

• Genjo Sanzo : Pardon me, but don't these guys know they're supposed to be our enemies?

  Sha Gojyo : Yeah, so what do you call that thing on your shoulders, huh?

• Sha Gojyo : I ain't dyin'. And I tell ya, I super hate to lose.

  Genjo Sanzo : Don't say super.

  Sha Gojyo : What should I say? Hella hate?

• Genjo Sanzo : Sheesh. I thought one Goku was bad enough.

  Sha Gojyo : You should think of all of the trouble they'll cause for other folks.

  Cho Hakkai : Besides, illegal copies are an infringement of copyright.

• Genjo Sanzo : Well, he did go without eating for about 500 years, so his body must be trying to make up for it.

• Genjo Sanzo : Murder doesn't necessarily mean evil, right? The world being what it is, a lot of people out there deserve to die, don't they? But those who do take it upone themselves to kill others have to be prepared to have others try to kill them as well. And that's what they call the law of Karma, my friends. That's why good or bad, the only ones who are going to be left standing are the ones with the strongest wills to survive.

• Genjo Sanzo : The gods do not save anyone. You alone are responsible for saving your life.

• Genjo Sanzo : I don't chant sutras for the dead, you got that?

• Genjo Sanzo : I wouldn't go on a trip with you fools if you paid me.

• Genjo Sanzo : What makes you think that there is only one path to take?

• Goku : Why would a demon com all that way just to eat a Sanzo? Are Sanzos that tasty?

  Sha Gojyo : Now don't you go getting any funny ideas, hear me?

  Genjo Sanzo : I seem to recall the spider woman saying something about eating holy monks. Interesting. Apparently a healthy serving of monks helps you live longer.

  Cho Hakkai : So eating a high ranking monk like a Sanzo is as good as eating your fruits and vegetables when you're a demon, is that it?

  Sha Gojyo : You've got to be shitting me.

• Cho Hakkai : Being a Sanzo doesn't necessarily make you as strong as a demon. He was probably a proper, serious, ordinary, very devout Sanzo.

  Sha Gojyo , Goku : Oh, right, gotcha.

  Genjo Sanzo : What do you mean by that?

• Genjo Sanzo : [gasps in pain after being kicked by Goku]  Ow, that hurt. What'd you do that for?

  Goku : Berate me. Go ahead and strike me with your little paper fan. That's what the Sanzo priest I know would do.

  Cho Hakkai : [voice over]  Sanzo's rage vanished instantly. The Sanzo priest was really no match for the monkey's wit.

• Genjo Sanzo : Pull yourself together, you stupid monkey.

• Goku : [chuckling]  Oh, man.

  Genjo Sanzo : What are you giggling about?

  Goku : [still chuckling]  I'm not giggling.

  Genjo Sanzo : You're so creepy.

• Sha Gojyo : You, dying of hunger? That's I'd like to see.

  Genjo Sanzo : What's wrong, Goku?

  [Goku faints] 

  Cho Hakkai : Goku!

  Sha Gojyo : I'll go get you some food right away! Just hold on! Don't die on me monkey.

  [Goku sits up happily] 

  Goku : In that case, I'll take some pot stickers.

  [Gojyo smacks him] 

• Lirin : Hey guys!

  Genjo Sanzo : No, it can't be.

  Sha Gojyo : If it itsn't Sanzo's little pet. Look at Sanzo has a little pet.

  Genjo Sanzo : Peeve. Pet peeve. I hate her.

• Genjo Sanzo : What a persistent little f...

  Sha Gojyo : I envy you man. Why don't the chicks pursue me like this, Sanzo?

  Genjo Sanzo : I will kill you.

• Lirin : Okay, bald Sanzo, here I come!

  Genjo Sanzo : Goku, you fight her.

  Goku : Oh, kick ass! Why'd you choose me?

  Sha Gojyo : Makes sense. She's your size.

  Goku : But Hakkai's the one who's good with children.

  Cho Hakkai : No, no! Gojyo's the one that's good with women.

  Sha Gojyo : Yeah, but she's, she's Sanzo's girlfriend.

  Genjo Sanzo : You're askin' for it.

• Kouryui, Kid : I don't understand you at all. Not in the least. I know that the Buddha extols the heavenly virtues of preserving all life, but you not only risked your own life to save me from that raging river, but you took me in a kept me at your side.

  Koumyou Sanzo : It was because of the sound of your voice.

  Kouryui, Kid : Huh?

  Koumyou Sanzo : You called out to me, repeatedly. You called out so many times, I had never seen such will in a child before.

  Genjo Sanzo : I cried out to him, and he heard me.

  Koumyou Sanzo : You were so noisy I had to take you with me. You were driving me crazy.

  Kouryui, Kid : I'm sorry, I don't quite understand.

  Koumyou Sanzo : One day, Kouryu, you will hear a voice call out to you. Then you will understand.

  Kouryui, Kid : If I ever did heard that voice, I would take him in, too. I would teach him discipline and obedience with my fan.