Review of The Last Seven

2/10
No, no, no. No.
31 August 2010
I do not review as often as I should, but sometimes I feel like not doing so would mean a sleepless night. This is one of those nights.

The Last Seven is arguably the most poorly constructed, ill-fated, and hopeless attempt at making a movie I have ever seen outside those who recognize the feebleness of their movie and attempt to at least derive some kind of humor out of the film. It is so difficult for me to decide where to begin, because everything is wrong.

If that does not satisfy your curiosity, then let me hit the big three as I see them.

Number 1: Character development. Throughout the entire film, I was never given any reason to care about any of the characters outside of a boo-hoo flashback for someones missed birthday. I didn't care if they lived, if they died, or if they were forced to sit through their own horrible acting. I just didn't care about anything that was happening to them in the slightest, and it destroyed what little bit of plot development there was. And when I say little, I mean LITTLE.

Number 2: Wannabe artistic filming and editing. Out of place flashbacks, requiem-for-a-dream shortcut film sequences, long, drawn out scenes flip-flopping with super short, shaky camera snapshot progressions, third grade special effects, the "hitchcock" scare (attempt) and the list goes on, and on, and on, and on, and on. And. On.

Number 3: Worse than a M. Night Shyamalan twist ending. Nuff said.

The only thing decent about this movie was the scenery, abandoned cities always look awesome.

Don't waste your time, and don't make me tell you I told you so.
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