Max Payne (2008)
1/10
strongly urging you NOT to see this film
28 October 2008
"I don't believe in angels, but I believe in pain..." Those opening lines of the movie can only mean one thing, trite bull****. I don't know what the people over at Fox Studios were doing when the subject of making a movie out of one of the best shoot 'em up, film noir inspired, and heart racing video game franchises came up for discussion. It certainly wasn't "Hey, we should play the game to see what this thing is all about." Nope. It was more like "Hey! This game made a lot of money. Someone quickly tell me what the back of the box says about the game and we'll write a crappy screenplay around it and miscast the whole thing." Mark Wahlberg plays Max Payne, the brutal, no holds barred and out for revenge cop from the video game of the same name... but wait! They rewrote nearly the whole character. He couldn't seem to give a rats ass about his murdered wife and child except for a few bland flashbacks. The acting is so misplaced and frozen in this movie and adding the likes of Mila Kunis, Chris O'Donnell, Ludicrous (holy crap what were they thinking?), and Beau Bridges didn't really give them much of a leg to stand on.

To sum it all up, I felt like falling asleep during the film (a feat not so easily accomplished for me). This was an action movie turned into a long boring drama with a few shooting sequences.

Don't waste your money. Rent 'Shoot Em Up' instead
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