1/10
What's for lunch?
12 October 2005
Warning: Spoilers
A couple of years back when this movie was still fresh on the market, I had the interest of obtaining it and watching it. Controversy sells, as everybody knows, and a movie about a school shooting sticks out, as far as plot descriptions go.

However, back then, the only way to get hold of the movie was by purchasing bootleg VHS copies for outrageously expensive prices. I would never pay more than ten bucks for a dubbed copy of a film, and still, even that seems like too much. So I held off, until recently, when I happened to see this movie on DVD on ebay. I placed my bid and got it for about 10 dollars including shipping. I was the only bidder.

Knowing that this film was low budget, I didn't expect top notch cinematography, acting, or effects. I went into this film with low expectations as it was. Yet, for some reason, I was STILL let down.

First of all, the acting, like everybody else has noticed and pointed out, is the worst I've ever seen in any movie, EVER. I've seen better acting in a kindergarten play. All of the characters, including William Hellfire and Joey Smack (the leads) were incredibly dull and emotionless. It honestly seemed like nobody was even trying. Not a single actor was believable with their characters, and I'd highly recommend to every single one of them to exclude this title from their resume's if they plan on getting other film work. Seems like the only other roles these people are getting are in other William Hellfire movies, as he obviously doesn't mind terrible acting.

The story is lame, redundant, and goes on for way too long. Let's not kid ourselves, Hellfire and Smack. The only reason people will watch this movie is because of the anticipation of the massacre scene itself. Everything leading up to the ending is boring, trying excessively too hard to be funny (which it isn't), and is very painful to watch. Easily, much of this movie should have been cut from the final release. Like, for example, the entire movie before the school massacre. Hell, even the shooting itself was incredibly lackluster, featuring some of the worst gunshot wounds I've ever seen, and don't even get me started on the "bombs". Or the "rocket", for that matter.

I think the directors wanted us to sympathize with the two killers by showing the film from their POV. Derick, who bares an odd resemblance to Napoleon Dynamite, has alcoholic parents and gets the front cover ripped off of his book. Derwin has... well, weird parents, and gets beat up at school (with the worst fight choreography I've ever seen). So, now, we're supposed to fall in love with these characters and believe that their massacre was fully justified. Oh, no, the only people I feel sorry for are all of the people who have had to pay for this movie, and even worse, watch it. Especially those poor souls who were paying 40 bucks or more for a bootleg back in the day.

There is not one redeeming quality about this movie. It is merely a lame attempt of a few sad young men to capitalize on recent controversy. When I won this on ebay, I was the only bidder (and there were multiple listings). I guess after the controversy wears off, this film has absolutely nothing to lean on. For anybody reading this who hasn't yet seen the movie, I strongly suggest for you to save your money and stay away. You've been warned.
15 out of 22 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink

Recently Viewed