I blame my housemate. He was wondering through the local video pit, and saw "From the director of 'Kids'..." blazing out from the shelf closest to his feet. What he was doing down there is his business, besides, he's an art student, so it was probably "ironic."
But as soon as it hit the tapehead, there were soon howls of derision from every poor soul in my living room at the general badness on display, and that was just the reaction to the bad color in the opening sequence. Suddenly, the realisation dawned that the next 90 minutes would be very, VERY long.
The basic plot is a bunch of teenagers leave their colony and find the Big City, naturally deserted after the obligitory apocalypse/societal breakdown. Somehow, they manage to oh-so conveniently walk into the one building that has other kids there, and discover sex, drugs, and rock n' roll in the space of about ten minutes. So far, so Kids, but there is one thing missing; the fact that Kids was A GOOD FILM. This clearly is not.
Basically, and I'm spoiling it for your benefit, sex causes your ribcage to be catapaulted across the room, along with the rest of the contents of your sternum, in a sequence so good, they decided to show it twice. Action replay obviously didn't die out with everything else...
So their new pals are actually mutants (dear God), and generally live how they like, which involves booze and snorting coke, and plenty of sex for reasons that obviously don't gain valuable press inches due to controversy. Yes, some sequences play out like Kids-lite, but you'd be hard pressed to find them due to your will to live being crushed somewhere in the first 20 minutes. Indeed, the rather spectacular gore effects seem to be in there to scream "WAKE UP!!!" at any poor soul still sat there watching this excretia. How they roped in Stan Winston to do these is a mystery that will never be solved, unless he actually did direct the sequences, which seems to be the case: Clark does film, Winston does misplaced SFX, nobody did script.
All in all, watch this, then find yourself desperately rummaging around for a copy of Kids, and watching it three times. There is a film-maker's folly, and then, lower than that, there is Teenage Caveman.
But as soon as it hit the tapehead, there were soon howls of derision from every poor soul in my living room at the general badness on display, and that was just the reaction to the bad color in the opening sequence. Suddenly, the realisation dawned that the next 90 minutes would be very, VERY long.
The basic plot is a bunch of teenagers leave their colony and find the Big City, naturally deserted after the obligitory apocalypse/societal breakdown. Somehow, they manage to oh-so conveniently walk into the one building that has other kids there, and discover sex, drugs, and rock n' roll in the space of about ten minutes. So far, so Kids, but there is one thing missing; the fact that Kids was A GOOD FILM. This clearly is not.
Basically, and I'm spoiling it for your benefit, sex causes your ribcage to be catapaulted across the room, along with the rest of the contents of your sternum, in a sequence so good, they decided to show it twice. Action replay obviously didn't die out with everything else...
So their new pals are actually mutants (dear God), and generally live how they like, which involves booze and snorting coke, and plenty of sex for reasons that obviously don't gain valuable press inches due to controversy. Yes, some sequences play out like Kids-lite, but you'd be hard pressed to find them due to your will to live being crushed somewhere in the first 20 minutes. Indeed, the rather spectacular gore effects seem to be in there to scream "WAKE UP!!!" at any poor soul still sat there watching this excretia. How they roped in Stan Winston to do these is a mystery that will never be solved, unless he actually did direct the sequences, which seems to be the case: Clark does film, Winston does misplaced SFX, nobody did script.
All in all, watch this, then find yourself desperately rummaging around for a copy of Kids, and watching it three times. There is a film-maker's folly, and then, lower than that, there is Teenage Caveman.