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Tattz_The_Bear
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Reviews
Hounded (2022)
Silly and Boring
Basically a bunch of upper class twits chasing a crowd of hapless burglars around the Bedfordshire countryside.
Couldn't decide if it was meant to be scary, funny or just downright pathetic.
There were more holes in the plot than you could poke a stick at, the acting was hammy, the story line ridiculous and the camera work very ordinary.
It had the overall feel of a low budget children's movie made in the 1970's with a few expletives thrown in.
Everybody screams quite a lot and there is a lot of tomato sauce thrown around.
If you've got any jobs that need doing (eg. Cleaning the oven, mowing the lawn) I would suggest that your time would be far better utilized by doing them than sitting through approximately ninety minutes of this drivel.
The Bear (2022)
Boiling Point in America
Basically a rehash of the 2021 movie "Boiling Point" starring Stephen Graham and Vinette Robinson.
Subtle changes to the story line have been made to avoid litigation but I'm sure a phone call to his lawyers will have crossed the mind of Philip Barantini, the writer and director of the original story.
The Bear is noisy and confusing and lacks any real tension and is basically just a silly tale of a cordon bleu chef trying to apply his skills to his late brother's lunch bar.
Rather than sitting through approximately four hours of this rubbish you would be better off immersing yourself in "Boiling Point" instead.
Mercy (2020)
I've Seen Worst, I Just Can't Remember When
I don't normally write reviews of movies but as this one was so abysmal I felt compelled to, more as a health warning than as a critique.
It was pathetic.
The movie states that it is based on a true story but whose story we are not sure. It doesn't appear to be that of SSG Alex N. Bahmandeji to whom the movie is dedicated.
It tells the mournful tale of Jeffrey Hansen who, having left the army, lost his brother, then his job, then his wife and also owes 30 grand to a loan shark so therefore decides to top himself.
To say the acting is wooden is really an insult to lumber yards. Most of the time it appears the actors, or rather participants, are reading their lines off each other's foreheads.
The whole movie appears to have been filmed on somebody's cellphone and the sound quality is woeful with wide fluctuations in volume and the quality becoming painfully scratchy in parts.
Anyhow, we watch as poor old Jeff slowly sinks into the abyss of despair having decided to end it all with the aid of a disposable razor.
Then the loan shark rocks up and roughs up poor Jeff before shooting him in the leg. Then he goes but leaves his gun so that Jeff can finish the job (not sure how this helps the loan shark recover his debt) but then Jeff's old buddy turns up and also tries to shoot him. No idea why!
Then Jeff's ex-wife, who he hasn't seen for ten years, comes in and it turns out she's now with Jeff's best friend. Are you with me so far?
She admonishes Jeff's best friend for not shooting Jeff and then proceeds to shoot poor Jeff in the head herself. She then goes cross-eyed and staggers backwards out of the door. Roll credits.
The whole 70+ minutes is basically a jumbled, disjointed, badly acted, poorly filmed load of rubbish.
It has the feel of a cheap porn movie without the sex scenes.
It is so bad it will probably become a cult classic as time goes on.
The only item in the film that played its role convincingly was the red Dell laptop which kept appearing in various scenes.
The title was appropriate as you'll be begging for mercy as its grinds its way to a conclusion.