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Joshbond
Reviews
Halloween (2007)
Rob Zombie pulls it off!
Okay, just to start off.. 4 words THIS FILM IS AMAZING I've never fallen in love with a film so fast until the day i walked into Halloween. I have been waiting what feels like forever for this film and i could never be more pleased with it. Only once in a while you come across a film that inspires you, and you fall in love with it, and this was the one. It made me have a whole new look on Micahel Myers. Mind you not the same one Carpenter created. This film is a thrill a minute, very bloody, very intense, and very good soundtrack! My personal favorite scene was when Micahel was a kid beating on that bully in the woods.. God, it was so amazing.. Thank you Rob Zombie!
The Simpsons Movie (2007)
Love it or hate it
In my personal opinion it was a love or hate movie. And at first i really didn't like it. I thought the storyline was a little stupid and they made everybody in Springfeild act retarded just for the sake of it being funny. And it was waaay too short. I mean i am serious when i say this. It felt like a double episode. So don't get comfy in your seat. By the time your halfway through your popcorn it will be over. The storyline was pretty good, not amazing, but you have to cut them some slack. They did EVERYTHING in the god knows how many episodes they have. I love the Simpsons but i'm not going to buy this movie or rent it when it comes out on DVD. I'll watch it again but not in the near future. It was just OK. And i couldn't get over the fact that it was just OK. About 40 minutes into the film it stopped getting funny and the audience wasn't laughing at all. Maybe it was because people we're only laughing through the beginning because it was "THE SIMPSONS MOVIE" and had to funny just for that reason, or maybe the writers we're in crappy mood halfway through writing it. I would have really liked it they threw in some famous episode references. It seemed like they forgot their roots, why people ACTUALLy watched this film. The only character that fell into place was Homer. Which i mean.. Okay how do you screw up an idiot? You don't. I wish they took a little more time to make this, make it longer, and add some of the real creative and smart humor that The Simpsons really is made of.
Hot Rod (2007)
Cool Beans
I went to go see this for $4.20 with my brother, sister and cousin. This has got to be one of the most underrated comedies ever. This film was so funny didn't know where to stop with the comedy. Which made it the perfect film to see in groups with your friends. Some of the comedy in it didn't make too much sense but i didn't think anybody in the theater got the joke..Yet everyone was laughing.. This film also had a GREAT soundtrack! Epic and funny songs in the most perfect atmospheres.. The whole film was about a crappy wanna-be stuntman who wants to raise 50 grand for his dying step dad just so he can nail him in the face! the film was everything it needed to be, and other than The Simpsons Movie i thought it was the best comedy of the summer!
Mortal Kombat: Annihilation (1997)
Fatality....
I have been a big fan of the mortal kombat games, and the first movie for a long time. So, when I got the sequel for my birthday, I was excited to watch it. Who could blame me? The first movie, up until the recent final fantasy 7 movie (which i'd suggest watching) was probably the very best video game movie made, and wasn't a bad piece of cinema. However, now mortal kombat Annihilation comes into play, and there could never be a more appropriate title for it. It really did annihilate the mortal kombat franchise. To be fair, I would normally tell you about some good moments of the movie to even things out and give it justice, but sadly there were none. All the good characters from the first have been replaced or killed, and the result is devastating. Costumes and lines are just plain cheesy (to bad you...will die!) and there are a lot of plot holes ("The earth was built in six days, so in two shall it be destroyed, and on the seventh day, mankind will bow down!". What? If you destroy it on the 6th day, how can we bow down on the 7th). The entire movie is just a gigantic waste of time. I would rather watch my grandmother have a seizure while getting eaten by a pack of rabid wolves then look at the case of that movie again. the only relieving point of this movie, is that the music score is OK ( literally the only point of the movie that can possibly be called "OK"). It's hard to believe there is a movie on the face of this planet that I would rather see in the hands of Uwe Boll then the people who made it, as it would have been an improvement. I'd go on, but even talking about this movie makes me wish i had lung cancer. It's difficult to claim which movie on the planet is the worst, but this is the worst. Avoid. This movie is just one large mess. Fatality!
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning (2006)
I like this face better
This movie started off like any other horror flick. Especially a Texas chainsaw massacre flick but this movie answers so many questions from the first one and really makes it look like this movie should come first. The blood effects are amazing and the storyline was fresh and overall the movie was amazing! It took a little getting used to because although it was a lot like the first one it was very different. I won't spoil it for ya but this one makes the first one look like a Teletubbies Christmas Special! If you love gore, suspense, terror, and the symbol of all that is just plain wrong then The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning is just your slasher!