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josie-maria
Reviews
Obi-Wan Kenobi (2022)
Completely unnecessary and pointless
It didn't offer any substance whatsoever to the Star Wars universe. It's nothing more than a flat afterthought.
The character development of Obi-Wan was meh at best. It didn't do Darth Vader any justice. In fact, it flattened his character to a point where my childhood self screamed in agony in reminiscence of the original Star Wars movies.
Even the new characters fell short. Moses Ingram as the Third Sister did such a cringe-worthy job that I almost wanted to close my eyes whenever her character came on.
You can easily skip this series. To be honest, I recommend doing so. At least if you have any appreciation for the old movies.
Gaia (2021)
Weird, boring, and tries too hard
I knew this wasn't going to be a traditional horror flick, which piqued my interest! Unfortunately, it was a disappointment from start to finish.
You'd think that in a movie with so few characters, there'd be room for an interesting character development but everything just fell flat. I was pretty much rooting for them to die as soon as possible so the movie would come to an end.
I rarely get downright bored with a movie, but this one was just a snooze, trying too hard to be something it isn't - original, deep, and artsy.
I recommend skipping this one. There are far better ways to waste 1h 36m.
Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2022)
Idiotic movie
Even considering it's a slasher movie, the amount of stupid decisions is staggering.
The plot is pretty dull.
The acting is average at best.
The characters are all absolute morons to a degree that makes the movie almost unwatchable.
Also, even for a movie - there's a limit to how many times you can shoot, cut, and stab a guy and still have him running around.
Do yourself a favour: Don't watch it.
I have a pretty high tolerance for bad horror movies but this is one is not worth anyone's time... not even when you're hungover and just wanna watch something stupid.
Katla (2021)
Boring...
...and not just because it's a slow burner. The characters are dull and soulless. You don't care about any of them or what happens to them. Even when something supposedly shocking happens you just shrug and go "meh" because you aren't invested in any of them.
Dracula (2020)
Great show - but struggles at the end
I loved it! It's not just yet another remake of the same story but has some great twists and characters.
Claes Bang plays an excellent Dracula - dark, eerie, seductive and, of course, overdramatic at times (it is Dracula after all).
Dolly Wells as Sister Agatha really carries the show as well - and their interaction is brilliant.
However, I agree with many others here that the last episode falls short compared to the first two.
It's a strange and unnecessary jump from the dark, gothic setting to something more bland.
It's the initial atmosphere that lures the viewer in so the change does the show a great disservice along with the introduction of some rather flat characters.
Nevertheless, I highly recommend it.
Crawl (2019)
Dumb, mindless entertainment
I know it's a movie, and it's not necessarily supposed to reflect reality but omg this movie is so dumb.
Sure, let's drive straight into a massive hurricane in an area where everybody has been evacuated. Totally realistic.
Also super realistic that you don't know anything about the fact that there's a massive hurricane because you went to swim practice. Do you live under a rock?
Also impressive that you can walk and swim as if nothing has happened despite the fact that a gator has sunk its teeth into your arm and leg and dragged you around. Again, very realistic.
Other people have described the flaws and inaccuracies in greater detail, so I'll just stick with saying that the movie is downright laughable and pretty much gets everything wrong about hurricanes and alligators.
If you're up for a ridiculous, mindless "horror" movie, then go ahead.
If you're up for a scare and a sense of thrill, stay away. According to my Fitbit, my pulse stayed at an average of 59 throughout the movie.
The Silence (2019)
Flat, predictable, and lazy
Nothing special and no original thought whatsoever has gone into this movie. Flat characters, and a predictable storyline with all the clichés of the genre.
But if you don't take it too seriously, it's still some chill entertainment if you just want something simple to put on while treating a hangover, playing Candy Crush or whatever.
What really annoys me though is that they clearly didn't bother to do any research into what it's like being deaf.
For example, the supposedly deaf girl literally carries out a conversation with her father in a dark room with no sign language being used. And sometimes she replies to questions and comments although she's not standing face to face with that person. Yes, some deaf people can read lips but it's very difficult (and in the story, she's only been deaf for three years).
She also appears to react to noises.
Congrats on the Sabrina success, Kiernan. But how about putting an actual effort into a role instead of some less than halfhearted attempt at appearing deaf?
Titans (2018)
Great show - poorly cast Raven
Honestly, I was very sceptical about Titans but the show positively surprised me! I was hooked from the beginning.
The major flaw though is Raven. Teagan Croft fails to leave a memorable impression in an otherwise super cool role. Raven is such a great character and yet in this show, every other character outshines her, and they are ones making the show worth watching - not her
The Rain (2018)
Stop complaining and give the show a proper chance
I don't get why people are giving this show so much hate - or why people bother to review it after just one episode.
It's not the best show out there but a decent and fairly enjoyable contribution to its genre.
And to all the people complaining about the stupid decisions of the kids: Guess what - they're kids! And not just kids but teenagers peaking at the "I-probably-won't-think-this-entirely-through" age.
And really, do you think you would be all rational, calm and collected if your world was turned into an apocalypse from one moment to the other and your enemy is the freaking rain? (Rain is pretty much the default weather in Denmark meaning everybody would be beyond screwed).
So in short: Give the show a proper chance. It's not Nordic noir quality but nevertheless an entertaining show to watch - especially when you just want a relaxing weekend on the couch.
The basic idea for the show is quite good but with some hiccups along the way.
Beta Test (2016)
Waste of time
Do yourselves a favor and avoid this movie.
Messy plot, flat characters, bad acting, terrible dialogue and laughable fighting scenes are just a few of the movie's problems. I'm amazed I actually managed to watch it from beginning to end. It's absolutely pointless - there's no depth in the movie whatsoever.
Death Note (2017)
Don't bother - watch the anime
Absolutely horrible! If you find the story intriguing - watch the anime instead. This movie adaption comes with very flat and immensely annoying characters as well as bad acting. The great diversity and depth of characters such as Light, L and Ryuk are completely absent. The story of the death note is rather rushed and very ill-explained. I imagine it makes little sense if you don't know the anime.