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BristolKween
Reviews
Maestro (2023)
Boring AF
I wish Hollywood would stop trying to shove Bradley Cooper down our throats. He hasn't got the chops for these roles. He's always "acting" and not becoming. I feel bad for all the talent that'll be shoved into projects with him because the industry needs a leading white guy to bring in the production investment. This film could have soared with a great leading actor and just a few more rounds of edits on the script.
The main reason to see the film is of course the life and legend being portrayed. The actors were all phenomenal minus the weight needed to lead the ensemble. Great cinematography and costumes.
Crazy Rich Asians (2018)
Material Girl
A few minutes into the film, and you will know exactly how everything in the movie will play out. The tension builds around whether the poor girl (who is gorgeous) will get the rich guy (who is gorgeous) although his rich gorgeous family doesn't like poor girls (no matter how gorgeous they are). The dialogue is really lame. And you'll get what you expect: gay characters are flamboyant; poor characters are wise and have good values; rich characters are plotting to keep themselves pure. The settings are great to look at. The whole thing is a sugar bomb: delicious for a few seconds but offers no nutritional value. That's all fine but just know what you're going for.
Earthquake Bird (2019)
A Mess
Caught this at the festival last week. I wish I hadn't. How Netflix was convinced to make this into a movie is beyond me. The book had an actual ending. This is not the same story though. Some white girl is confused and goes to find herself in mystical Asian country. Then she falls apart further because of, wait for it, some guy that is closed-off emotionally, sends all these creepy signals, and just takes pictures of her, controlling what she does. Pitting woman against woman, this (non-Japanese, male) director makes it so the Asian guy gets even creepier. Sigh. It's 2019 and this film cost millions I assume. What's it offer? Sexism, Asian fantasy, the Yellow Peril, all wrapped up in a total mess of a film with the viewers never sure if we're watching a dream, a fantasy, something real from the past, or from the future.