MDCarver1980 Reviews

Nuovo Olimpo (2023)

Frustrating

[7/10 · 27 November 2023]

I started off really enjoying this movie, and there was a lot of suspense for me. But, about half way through I realized that no matter how this movie ends, its not going to be a happy situation. Then it kinda felt like a waste of time. I think it might have done better as kind of like a "Sliding Doors" situation where you see what happens after they get torn apart, and what would have happened if they had made their date. I might have enjoyed it more. If I were going to compare this to another film it would be Brokeback Mountain. There are a lot of similarities in that two men meet, fall in love, then go on to lead separate lives. Nuovo Olimpo however, they dont meet up in the summers, its more of a "will they ever find each other again? And if they do what will happen?"

The acting and the directing was fine ane there were some clever devices used as well as creative dialogue that made me think "Huh! Well thats clever!"

Also the leads are both very easy on the eyes, and there are a couple of very steamy scenes.

Overall its a well made movie and even though I had some issues with the plot, its nice to see a quality movie with gay leads. They are few any far between.

Matt Rife: Natural Selection (2023 TV Special)

Not funny

[1/10 · 26 November 2023]

He comes across as disingenuous, like he's reading a script from a high school play. I dont believe anything he says and he just seems so fake. Not funny, not good. I would reccomend Nate Bargetze, Tom Segura, ocer this guy. Rife's "jokes" if you can call them that, are tired. I would not be surprised if someone else wrote all his material. There is nothing about this guy or his show that I find redeeming. You'd be better off in a laundromat watching your clothes spin in the washer and the drier. That would be more entertaining for an hour than wasting it on this special. Find something else to watch.

Mrs. Davis (2023)

Absurd? Yes. Offensive? Maybe a little, but that's on you.

[8/10 · 20 May 2023]

I was put off, at first, by this show. I felt like it was going to be some back-wards coming to faith metaphor, which turns me off. Betty Gilpin, and the creators of this show, have a history of making Conservative-Fare and using the absurd to tell a story. I dont like Conservative Fare but I do love the Absurd, so I stuck around. Ultimately I was "Satisfied" by the ethos of this show, and didnt feel overly preached at and quite enjoyed it, despite my progressive leanings. I would recommend going into this with an open mind and dont let yourself be offended by some of the content of this show, especially if you consider yourself to be Christian and Religious. It is really a good story, and a good journey.

Wednesday (2022– )

One of the Worst Shows I have ever seen!

[1/10 · 30 November 2022]

Aside from some Questionable Casting Choices, I was looking forward to this show. Within 5 minutes I knew I had to throw out any preconcieved notions I may have had about the Addam's family and take this show on its own. None of that is why I have so many problems with this show.

This feels like a poorly written cliche New Student at High School complete with Alternagirl being forcibly paired with the Preppy Blond, who gives her a tour of campus complete with "These are the different cliques and this is what you should think about them, oh and there's the Evil Prom Queen. No one will ever beat her" to Alternagirl bonds with guy from group she's told to stay away from. And an obvious set up for a love triangle.

They might as well and written the script in crayons. The lines for these characters have al been heard before in "Insert Random TEEN Drama Here" and brings nothing to the table. They arent even utilized in any creative way.

The concept and plot points make no sense. She is being sent to a school for Misfit Children who are different, but the school social dynamics and personalities are EXACTLY the same that have been presented at every High School Set Movie or TV show since Grease! Or even earlier. Outcadt in Name only. Everyone Magically Knows Fencing, Which Brings me to my next point of contention.

Wednesday, the central Character (Duh) is presented as someone with a high knowledge base, high level of skill in Escape, Planning, Manipulation, Subterfuge, Fencing (?), Super-Negativity and Non-Conformity. But in her first Escape attempt she fails to consider that making a scene with the Kindergarten Quality Townie Bullies might work against her? That makes no sense. Wednesday's dynamic with her mother Morticia also makes no sense, NOR does the cringey Nick Name Gomez decides to give Morticia. No Itteration of Morticia would EVER deign to be called "Tish" WHAT?!

Jenna Ortega fails to bring anything new to a character and instead simply copies Christina Ricci's take. Ricci's take was far scarier and leaned heavily on dead-pan delivery than the original TV show. Ortega just does more of the same. I suppose if you think someone can be Star Quality at singing Karaoke, you could enjoy her performance here.

On top of my small personal Petty Complaints (The Gomez casting decision, that Kid from "The Gifted" who just grates my nerves) All of this together makes the show UNWATCHABLE!

Visitors (2022– )

This show is SO BAD

[1/10 · 18 July 2022]

I dont care if its because I am not a french speaker or not. This show is terrible. While watching I could not figure out if this was a serious show or not the "writing," or the translated script, is just awful. The ADR voice actors are unusually stiff and flat on delivery, and the choice of words at time is awkward. Is this really supposed to be a comedy? It does not present that way, but even if it is, it's done very poorly to the point of being unwatchable. I could not make it past the 3rd episode and only that far because I wanted to try and figure out what the hell I was watching.

The Lost City (2022)

A Remake of "Romancing The Stone".... Without the Romancing

[6/10 · 30 May 2022]

The similarities between this and the great movie "Romancing the Stone" are very strong. But it's not an official remake. This movie lacks passion and story and replaces them with Mustache Twirling Victims and a Character Bullock has played several times already .... Think "Miss Congeniality." Too smart to be doing what she's doing and she only deigns to do her job, and eventually learns something about herself. Channing Tatum has one thing: Pretty, and he uses it well here. There are some funny moments, but nothing that had me rolling on the floor. It's a good rainy afternoon kind of movie. But if you want something better that doesnt rely on cheap slapstick and has a palpable romantic storyline where both characters have a beginning, middle, and an end, something with substance... go with "Romancing the Stone"

The Bubble (2022)

I laughed the whole time

[8/10 · 23 April 2022]

I went into this with no idea of what to expect at all. No trailer or anything other than the quick blurb on Netflix. Once it got going I was laughing so frequently my ribs were sore by the end! I watched this completely sober but I bet this would be a blast if you have any herbal supplements. I highly recommend!

Joe vs. Carole (2022)

Well Done

[8/10 · 13 March 2022]

I felt like this show did an excellent job at Humanizing Both of the Main Characters. Throughout the series they are both presented as sympathetic. The performances are outstanding, especially Kate McKinnon, who turned in work that I think Ms Baskin Herself must appreciate.

I know this is a Drama, and the events surrounding these people and their stories are horrific, But, I do feel like some situations could be played for comedy to at least lighten the mood. This can get a little heavy handed at times. To answer the question I had the whole time was "Will this show Mention or Reference the Netflix Seties?" Yes. In fact it goes just a little beyond the release of the original series.

In the End I think that the truth is somewhere between "Tiger King" and "Joe vs Carole" ... both of which are presented with a purpose. "Tiger King" to show the Bat-Guano Craziness of the whole situation with a slant that Carole may have done a bad bad thing. "Joe vs Carole" to give everyone involved a soul, and to humanize them and to make Carole out to be less of a villain than the docuseries suggests.

Overall I highly reccomend this show both on its own merits, and as a companion to "Tiger King."

I certainly hope this show gets a fair shake in Awards Season. Especially For Kate McKinnon, And John Cameron Mitchell for their lead performances and Kyle McLachlan for his supporting role as Harry Baskin.

I honestly cant understand why anyone would give this a rotten tomato unless they are just completely disinterested in the story and were forced to watch this.

Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings (2021)

Fun, but hardly Ambitious or Groundbreaking

[6/10 · 13 November 2021]

I didn't get to see this in theaters but I don't think that would alter my perception of this movie. On the outside it well made and well acted and an enjoyable film. However it has some issues and for me, didn't live up to the hype. Basically it's a Jackie Chan movie where Jackie Chan is played my Simu Liu and Chris Rock is played by Awkwafina. And suddenly (or not) mysticism. It almost doesn't feel like a traditional Marvel Movie. If it weren't for the "surprise" cameos here and there, and the almost laisez fare comment referring to Avengers: Endgame, you'd be hard pressed to believe it is one. Again it's fun, but not original.

Paradise Hills (2019)

Variation on "Stepford Wives"

[5/10 · 11 November 2021]

This borrows heavily from the horror film "Stepford Wives" in concept and execution. For those who've seen Stepford Wives that may be somewhat spoiler, though this movie does have some twists and turns of it's own. It is a slow burn that ultimately leaves you wanting to know what happens next.

I ranked this movie a 5 and not higher because I do not like movies about being institutionalized, especially against your will or unjustly. It makes my blood boil, I get angry and it distracts me from the movie. Aside from that Mila Jojovitch tries to be a Meryl Streep or Angelina Jolie, probably the latter, but fails. While it was nice to see her outside of Raccoon City, that's probably where she belongs and not playing some character that has.... Well.. character. The plot is heavily borrowed from, which is fine, but it was an original take on the idea, though, not as original as "Get Out" which also falls into the "Stepford Wives" category for me. The costuming and hair sets are supposed to be futuristic but are mostly distracting, who dresses like that as a patient in Any hospital? Also I have questions about the "Reveal" ... I mean, who all is in on it? And even more when it comes to the family situation. Anyway, it has some holes that need filling definitely, but it's not a bad movie really. Just, made me mad.

Anna (II) (2019)

Reductive Remake of his own "Point of No Return"

[1/10 · 4 November 2021]

This is almost a play for play remake of "Point of No Return" starting Bridgette Fonda... which Besson also wrote and directed and is far superior... the premise is very similar; the main character is very similar (though without the heroin addiction); even some scenes are carbon copy: the walled up bathroom window is replaced by a gun that isn't loaded, the hotel scene is practically the same minus an explosion... go watch "Point of No Return" his remake of his own movie into this.. "Anna" is reductive.

The Sacrament (2013)

Heavily Inspired by Jonestown Massacre

[7/10 · 22 October 2021]

I feel like they wanted to tell the Jonestown story but for some reason had to make it fictional... but this is Jonestown through and through... there is a really good scene when Sam does an "Interview" with Father and it is excellently done .... Well written and well acted, that scene .... It fell apart after that to hop skip and jump to the Big Jonestown stuff and from that point it's just a reenactment of any documentary you've seen about it.

Tig Notaro: Drawn (2021 TV Special)

Easily Tig's best Special so far!

[9/10 · 17 September 2021]

She is usually rather low key, sardonic, and dry. And that works for her. But until know I have never fallen off the couch laughing watching her stand up. Her opening story about her wisdom teeth I was laughing so hard I had to pause and calm down, the encounter with Jenny Slate was almost as funny and then the one with the Dolly Parton Song... I highly recommend this. It's Tig At Her Best So Far!

American Horror Stories (2021– )

Just Horrible

[2/10 · 1 August 2021]

The Acting, the plots, the characters....this is a cheap un engaging knock off of the original and it fails miserably. The first story is a condensed "elseworlds" version of Murder House, but pretty much the same, and there isn't a single likable or relatable character in there and the Parents are just the worst, the backstory they try to give plays no part but seems like it should, they can't decide what to do with the lead and the acting from everyone EXCEPT the parents is laughable. It's no wonder no one from the main cast of the show wants anything to do with this, except, unfortunately Matt Bomer. Someone suggested this is for pre-teens? No... but the stories are definitely focused on Teens, who can't act their way out of a cardboard box. But the premises and the stories are laughable. I do not recommend this show for anyone, especially fans of the Main Series.

Masters of the Universe: Revelation (2021)

I enjoyed this but it could have been done differently

[5/10 · 29 July 2021]

I wasn't prepared for the "twist" in the opening episode that sets up the rest of the season. I did however, enjoy everything that followed. What I would have liked, what I think would have been less traumatic to fans, or at least eased them into the inevitable with some glory and fanfare... is give us a full season leading up to the Event and make it a big deal so it could trend on Twitter all summer long "#OmgIsItTrue?" And the like, and then let what we have as season 1 of this show, be season 2. Take the first whole season to delve into the history of Greyskull and why it is Skeletor lusts after it so much, and why it must be protected.... Beyond the 5th Grade "them bad us good" ...Spolers: Since this is mostly teens and older people watching this because of the hype that they should have leaned more into the TV-14 rating and given a bit more blood, as it is, they still show some blood but only when they show the spear coming out of Adam's gut; and not been afraid of that obvious romantic interest Teela has; also why did Kevin Smith feel the need to kill off EVERYONE?! I understand his need for consequences and a sense of actual peril... but Joss Whedon said the same thing when he killed off Quicksilver and most Marvel Comics Fans have still not gotten over it. It felt like Kevin Smith thought he was going to save this franchise and re-invent it at the same time, and his ideas could have worked but he did it to fast and without the care that fans expect. I can see this series continuing after pdr 2 is released but the reigns should be handed to someone else.

Orange County (2002)

Catherine O'Hara and Jack Black make this move fun!

[8/10 · 4 October 2020]

This is a typical movie of its time.... it's made by MTV .... I enjoyed it when it was made.... the basic story is... basic... but Catherine O'Hara and Jack Black make this movie funny and worth watching.... for comparison reasons Steve Martin did a scene in a movie where he accidentally took ecstasy .... and he falls in love with a tree... as someone who has enjoyed said substance.... you know Steve Martin never enjoyed the same, drugs don't make you fall in love, or lust, with foliage. But Jack Black's character is a druggie in this movie, and his performance of being on various illicit substances lets everyone know... "He knows".... which I appreciate. Catherine O'Hara plays a supporting role in which she does an excellent job making us laugh with the time she is given but also explains why she was the best choice for Moira Rose in Schitt's Creek.

SparkShorts: Out (2020) Season 1, Episode 7

Bravo Disney!

[10/10 · 15 September 2020]

It was cute, had positive messages.... a bit of stereotyping with a cat and dog in the very beginning. But overall a creative and fun way to address this issue to a younger audience. And it's on Disney+ !!! Why is no one talking about that?! It's only 10 minutes long so definitely worth your time!

Drunk Parents (2019)

This is Awful

[1/10 · 30 August 2020]

I'm not sure how anyone could enjoy this. The performances especially from Baldwin and Hayek. The directing is like its for a kids movie, but the subject matter and language and even some of the actual content is not for kids. The concept is so incomprehensible that the leads are previewed as unlikeable cowardly idiots and the movie is completely un-relatable, even for people (like me) who have had to face unemployment and economic hardship. But you make sacrifices, you downsize, you sell off valuables while you May have to cover costs until you find something to keep your head above water.... you don't do ANY of the things they do in this movie. This wanted to be something like "Fun With Dick And Jayne" but at least that movie was funny once or twice.

The Order: Spring Outbreak, Part 2 (2020) Season 2, Episode 8

This Episode really took me out of the show

[1/10 · 11 July 2020]

Jason Priestly and Ian Ziering show up with no real heads up playing ego driven Parodies of themselves and have a figurative "measuring" contest... I was not prepared for this. When I saw Ian I thought "Well, he's been doing Sharknado & Chippendales...this is a step up for him good for him." Then when they literally nominate Jason Priestly to be the new leader of the coven I was confused. At first, when they made such a big deal about him with a close up and someone said "Good to see you again." I thought I had missed something, I thought he'd played a villain I had forgotten about, and was making a surprise return to the coven to everyone's chagrin. Nope, they're actually nominating actual Jason Priestly (Played by Jason Priestly) to replace the current leader of the Coven.... but it doesn't stop there.... maybe I wasn't paying attention before this happened, I tend to zone out from time to time when I binge a show. But Ian Ziering isn't completely sure he supports Priestly as the new leader, and that's when I realized this character was Ian Ziering (Played by Ian Ziering)... I'm in a small state of confusion and maybe a little bit of shock that I make sure to pay attention when Ian and Jason start arguing about who does Magic better. Jason throws an insult at Ian along the lines of "You couldn't cast a spell to save your career." TO WHICH... Ian shows off his muscles, makes some allusion to the Chippendales and starts rattling off Sharknado and it's subsequent sequels, using his figures in time when saying "Sharknado! Sharknado 2! Sharknado 3..." and so on.... and that's his defense. Sharknado is the magic spell he cast to be a star. At that point I checked out. This was the last episode of the show I've watched, I don't know if it was the finale or back or even remember how the episode ended.

This was such a non sequitur to the show, and distracting to the events that were unfolding in the story that it broke the tether keeping me interested in this series. What do Jason Priestly and Ian Ziering have to do with Witches? Or Secret Societies? Why THEM? It makes no sense. Maybe if was Alissa Milano and Rose McGowan I could get the joke, or something like that. I think maybe it was a Producer or the Director that was unwaveringly married to the idea of this Tet-a-tet between some aged celebrities that they probably sent out the P.A. And said "Go get me Sandra Bullock and Nicole Kidman, or Better yet, Alyssa Milano and Rose McGowan! This is gonna be great!" And when the P.A. Got back they said "Well I couldn't get Alyssa Milano and Rose McGowan. But my best friend's husbands' brother was a P.A. On the last Sharknado and knows Ian Ziering, plus he's like 60% sure he can get..." ... "Shannon Doherty?!?" .... "No, Jason Priestly." ... "Well, I'm not sure how that's gonna fit in. But the Elder Millennial's will LOVE It all the same, even if it doesn't make any sense. Yeah, get them in here... Jason Priestly and Ian Ziering.... yeah, this is gonna be Hilarious!" I don't have time to get into why the whole situation itself no matter who was under the robes, would have been distracting anyway, and probably confusing however it played out. Anyway, that's my rant.

The Iliza Shlesinger Sketch Show (2020)

Her comedy doesn't translate to Sketch

[1/10 · 30 April 2020]

I love her Stand Up shows, and there's a stray skit floating around YouTube about her Party Goblin that is hilarious.

This sketch show is so painfully unwatchable I couldn't get past the second episode. The first one hurt, but I enjoy her so much, I gave it another shot... it is so bad it breaks the space time continuum into pieces.

This show is so poorly conceived, it is essentially Acting out the jokes she tells in her shows, with a few different concepts that are so out of touch with what makes sketch comedy fun that it literally causes emotional distress.

The Politician (2019–2020)

Has the stink

[1/10 · 1 October 2019]

This is "Glee" meets "Cruel Intentions" the plot is unbelievable and the support teams as campaign planners are a joke. Literally everyone, both leads their significant others their parents their friends... every one is bi/pan sexual. Which is fine, but also unbelievable... the plot points are ridiculous, the characters, except the mom and the "best friend (who doesn't make it through the first episode), are entirely unlikable... criminals go free to suit the plot, it makes no sense and the storytelling is awful.

Secret Obsession (2019)

Isn't this a remake?

[4/10 · 19 July 2019]

There's another movie with the exact same premise: "Before I go to Sleep" so, spoilers if you've seen that movie.

House of Usher (2008)

It's David Decoteau... what do you expect?

[4/10 · 6 June 2019]

So I actually started watching this movie not knowing this was a David Decoteau movie. I didn't see his name on the credits initially. It didn't take place inside that Malibu mansion that all his other movies take place in.... but the first "make out scene" and that appearance of whighty tighties had me thinking "hey... is this a David Decoteau movie?" Turns out yes, hence expectations lowered. As far as being a faithful adaptation of Poe's story, it kinda sticks to the point but goes in a very different direction. It is also one of Decoteau's more directly gay movies. Most of his stuff isn't really "gay" it just has gay appeal... this is gay. As far as Decoteau compared himself, this is actually a better effort to make an actual movie that isn't just a glorified skin pic, though it definitely is that too... kind of... but the "make out scenes" are much shorter in comparison and while poorly constructed and written, a larger portion of this movie actually contributes to the plot than in most of his movies (which usually consist of a 15 minute scene of a guy wondering around looking for someone, and several 10-15 minute scenes of guys in white tighties rubbing their own chests in various locales such as a bed a shower or a home gym, with very little plot development or dialogue between those scenes).