sneakyshooter Reviews

Seven Samurai (1954)

Visually Striking, And Ahead Of Its Time

[9/10 · 22 January 2020]

For as long as I can remember, I've heard about Kurosawa's legendary influence on directors. I've always had his films on my watchlist, but I will admit the running times had scared me off. The other night I watched Seven Samurai as my first Kurosawa movie and I can say its hard to believe I waited so long.

This film is really something special. I cant really say anything that hasnt been said before. But the way each scene is shot, the way the characters are developed, and how the story unfolds is all excellently crafted. The actors are all superb and if it wasnt in black and white, you could pass this movie off as being very modern.

The samurai's steal the show in the best way possible, and you only end up wanting to know more about each of these men. They each seem to have a deep background and set of morales that they stick to, making them feel like real people.

Sure, the action may not be as flashy, but its very realistic. There are no sword "clanging" sound effects, no fleshy stabbing noises. People are simply cut down in a brutally honest way.

My only real complaint is that we never get to see or know any of the bandits. I understand why this was done, but the one scene where the leader kills two of his own for deserting was very interesting. I would have liked to see more of that, but I get that it was thought not to be important. It was shot more like a documentary almost, sticking with our heroes from start to finish.

In conclusion, everybody should give this movie a watch. Its a great lesson in story telling and directing, as well as a fun and visually interesting film. I now see what all the hype was about.

Joker (I) (2019)

A Very Competent Film

[7/10 · 11 January 2020]

Like this movie or not, you have to agree its at least a breath of fresh air. Phoenix does a great job at channeling just the right amount of psycho to portray the Joker.

The cinematography and lighting is very well done and really sets the atmosphere. While I agree with some that the morales of the movie can be misconstrued, it seems to be about coming out of your shell to be your true self and not caring what others think.

I did feel at times the movie was a bit preachy though. The whole "we live in a society..." comes off rather strong towards the end. Society and rich people = bad!! That was a bit too on the nose.

I also never really got the notion that this Joker was clever or intelligent in this movie. He just seemed psychotic. Which is really only a small part of what makes the character scary.

Now, I get that its from the Jokers point of view, but the Waynes and almost ALL other characters are just shown to be total one dimensional a-holes that we dont really have sympathy for. This could have been handled better I believe.

BUT, what makes these bad things listed above so interesting, is the very real possibility that the events in the film were actually all in the Jokers mind. Its established early on that he has delusions often, so the entire revolution and his rise to hero status could have very well been all imagined, which makes a lot of sense.

In conclusion though, I appreciated the risks the movie took and performance given by Phoenix. It was a fresh take on an already well established character, which can be difficult to do. And considering all of the god awful movies released now a days, I cant blame people who praise it as a perfect 10. Its deff worth it to give it a watch for yourself.

The Witcher (2019– )

Watered Down

[3/10 · 25 December 2019]

You would think that with all the source material available, both games and books, they could come up with something more engaging. The show is called The Witcher, yet Geralt is barely even in it at times. Some episodes (like the second ep for example) he only gets about 15 minutes of screen time. Which is dissapointing as Cavill is by far the best thing in the show. You can tell he's at least having fun with it all.

What shocked me the most was the flimsy costumes and some of the CGI. The swamp monster in the opening scene looked awful for some reason, while other monsters looked alright? Seems like theres some quality control issues going on here.

The writing is also pretty lazy. In the first episode, a king and queen discuss how they will never be invaded. Not even two scenes later, Nilfgaard (who are made to look one dimensional, evil, and borderline genocidal) have come and conquered the entire kingdom already and burnt it to the ground. Um, shouldnt we build up to these things? Then maybe we would have cared about this rather significant event.

I'm really not one to complain too much about the "diversity" in films as its to be expected these days, but it is way too forced in this show. This is supposed to be slavic middle earth, why does each scene have to look like a community college commercial?

I have played the Witcher games (mainly the third one) and really enjoyed them. Geralt is actually a rather deep and interesting character despite his surface. The games explored these stories and characters much better than this show did. Most of the high rated reviews on here are not only baffling but just plain sad. Rating this a 10 or a 0 is just not being honest, but thats how the reviews tend to go on here.

A Quiet Place (2018)

Had Potential But Lacks The Execution

[5/10 · 27 August 2019]

It was refreshing to watch something from Hollywood that wasnt a remake or a soft reboot for a change. All the actors in the movie were good for the material they were given. It was also a nice change of pace to have almost no dialogue. But theres just too much dumb stuff that happens to completley suspend your disbelief.

As many people have pointed out, if the monsters hunt by sound, why not live underground? Why not live near something loud? After 450 plus days in the apocalypse you think they would have figured better living arrangements out.

Now I know they probably wanted to repopulate the Earth, but why go to the trouble to concieve a baby that could cry and be loud, resulting in everyone killed? Why would you not remove the nail in the stairs that could cause someone to trip and make lots of noise? And for the love of god, did we really have to be treated to the sight of blood pouring from Emily Blunt as she gives birth? Come on movie. A cheap gross out gag.

Also Im sorry but the monsters did not look scary. In fact, they look exactly like the Necromorphs from Dead Space. I know monsters arent easy to come up with but its a straight rip off. And how on earth did they move so fast? (unless its convenient for dramatic tension, then they suddenly move slow) Again, Im trying to suspend my disbelief but come on.

Like I said, credit is given for taking a risk and trying something new. Thats something thats harder and harder to come by. Also credit for keeping it at an hour and half. No bloated filler scenes or characters. They get five stars for that.

So I would honestly say to at least give the movie a try for yourself. I could see why some people might like it. It just left me with way too many questions, and for my tastes thats not the mark of a good film.

Ghost Adventures (2004)

Real or Not, Zak Knew How to Tell a Story

[7/10 · 24 July 2019]

We can debate all day about the validity of Zak and Nick's evidence they captured, but thats not why I'm here giving it a high review. The editing and pacing of this documentary is what gave these guys thier extreme rise in popularity.

Its really unfortunate that the television show of the same name and cast was not able to follow suit with the same tone as the documentary. It seems obvious to me that Travel Channel execs told them to spice things up and over edit every scene to death with spooky music. But this documentary has very little of that.

The editing is great because it is very minimal. Zak understood the importance of letting the dead silence of a creepy location set the tone. It lets your imagination run wild, and thats what ultimatley scares the viewer. Just imagining what could be at the end of a dark tunnel can give you the chills. No corny reenactments with bad acting, or "spooky" musical stings. Just two men making a guerilla style documentary of the paranormal.

Like I mentioned earlier, the pacing is great as well. On one hand, it leads me to believe that everything was staged. The pacing is just too perfect. First, small noises, knocks, a shadow in the hallway, then ends with a bang, a brick being levitated on camera. If it wasnt for the charisma and true fear of the people involved, I would 100% certain it was fake.

But at the end of the day these guys really believe what they are seeing. Their sheer terror and jumping out of the second floor window is borderline embarassing, and I somehow doubt they would have scripted that part in. But fake or not, its highly entertaining. I would say give it a watch.

The Princess Bride (1987)

A Parody That Stands The Test of Time!

[9/10 · 23 April 2019]

I find it curious that IMDB lists this soley as an adventure fantasy film. It is, partially, but I've always viewed it as an amazingly well done parody.

It pokes fun of the fairy tale tropes while at the same time paying tribute to the genre. All the exaggeration about true love, evil princes, and torture chambers is on point. Its a self aware movie that plays up to its its biggest strength, the characters.

Every character in the film is memorable, even down to the preist who only has a few lines. The casting and writing of these characters all came together and it really shows. You just cant help but wish Wallace Shawn survived longer so his loveable villian character could get a little more screentime.

All in all, you should give this film a chance. Its a hilarious yet family friend entertaining ride that still holds up. As you wishhhhh!

The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers (2002)

Perfectly Executed

[10/10 · 18 November 2018]

Re watching the Two Towers today, almost 20 years later, its remarkable how well it still holds up. The effects still look great, mostly because they were used sparingly. The Uruk-Hai not being CGI piles of garbage is so much more effective than the Hobbit films. Gollum in some shots however does look a bit dated.

The pacing is fantastic, you dont even feel the almost 3 hours passing by. There are so many characters to introduce and develop which is not easy, but Jackson does an amazing job.

My only real complaint rewatching it now is the amount of comedy that occurs, especially during intense fight scenes. I understand that Gimli is comic relief, but at times it gets a bit much. My only minor gripe. Its not enough to take away from my 10 rating.

If you havnt seen these movies you need to watch them, this one being my personal favorite. The actors, pacing, tone, everything is spot on. A timeless epic that will be enjoyed for years to come.

The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies (2014)

Will Leave You Wanting More

[3/10 · 17 November 2018]

There's a lot wrong with the Hobbit trilogy, but my main gripe with it is all the CGI. If I wanted to see all these computer generated things fighting each other I would just play an xbox game. I came here to see a story told well and the Hobbit does not accomplish that.

The fact that the death of Smaug is so rushed at the start is very anti climatic. It sets a strange pace for the rest of the running time. This did not need to be three films but Peter Jackson clearly just wanted the cash grab. It's just so dissapointing after the flawless Lord of the Rings movies he made and it just leaves you with an empty feeling, wanting more.

The actors are great but you cant expect them to save a dumpster fire like this movie. Complete let down.

300 (2006)

How the Spartans Would Have Told It

[10/10 · 15 November 2018]

A lot of people seem to miss the main point with 300. The framing device of the whole film is Dilios (David Wenham) telling the story of the 300 spartans around a campfire to fellow soldiers. Hence why the film features exaggerated, over the top depictions of the Spartans, Persian empire, and Ephialtes the betrayer.

Did the persian empire really have legions of demon-like super soldiers with sharp teeth? Of course not. But to an ancient Greek in 480 BC the Persians probably seemed like a scary evil empire fueled by dark forces. Its from the Greek point of view.

Was Ephialtes actually a deformed hunchback? No, but to a Greek telling the story, he was an ugly traitor. So the exaggeration fits. Of course a Spartan telling the story would use hyperbole, to make the victory of his country sound that much more great.

Did Leonidas really kill a 6 foot long dire wolf with just a wooden spear? I think you get the point by now.

Re watch with this in mind and it becomes such a fun film. Its just like being around the campfire with some Spartans, listening to the exaggerated claims of a glorious battle.

The build up and pacing was executed perfectly. The looming threat of Persia can be really be felt. Although I will say, the scene with the child whos village was burned down was a bit cheesy.

The blue screen shots create a surreal, dream like atmosphere, even though it tends to get overused now a days. The special effects were amazing, especially for 2006. Great action and all around story telling. Will always be a favorite of mine.

Dunkirk (2017)

A Hollow Film

[1/10 · 2 November 2018]

After hearing all the raving reviews about Dunkirk, I was really looking forward to watching it. I was expecting a Saving Private Ryan type action/drama movie that would keep me on the edge of my seat. What I got instead was a yawn filled headache of an experience.

Not much happens in the film for how long it is. There are essentially no action scenes, which is fine, but the dialogue and "story telling" of this movie are beyond boring. You literally see no Nazis during the running time. It creates a feeling of no threat or danger.

Also, the soundtrack WILL give you a headache. Whoever approved of it needs to get thier ears checked.

You will finish this film and feel empty. As if you wasted your time. Why? Because its a hollow movie. All style. No substance. And the style is not even impressive. All 3 plots give a feeling of too much going on and not enough going on at the same time. It feels like nothing gets accomplished and no character has an arc. Avoid this overrrated waste of time at all costs.

Role Models (2008)

A Decent Comedy With A Rough Start

[7/10 · 1 November 2018]

Role Models is a decent enough comedy if you give it time to get rolling. Rewatching it again, I can see why a lot of people didnt give it a chance. The first 15- 20 minutes are somewhat odd, filled with jokes that fall flat and a pointless random Louis CK cameo (wtf?).

Once the guys join Sturdy Wings is when a lot of the funny scenes happen. Its often the actors improv thats entertaining and not the writing. Mintz-Plasse' nerdy charisma is hilarious to watch of course, and Paul Rudd always gives a solid effort.

You can absolutley tell this is a 2008 comedy, as it has many tropes of the era. One issue with the film I have is with it's editing. Seriously. Many weird cuts, bad pacing at times, and some jarring transitions. Felt mediocre in places.

In conclusion though, you can still get some laughs out of this dumb comedy. It accomplishes what it wants to without dragging too much. You can easily enjoy it even with its faults. "Youre the king Wheeler!"

SpongeBob SquarePants (1999– )

Seasons 1-4 Are Timeless Classics For Any Age Group

[10/10 · 29 September 2018]

The first 4 seasons of Spongebob Squarepants are a 10/10 in my book. Season 5 was alright, but it all seemed to go downhill after Stephen Hillenburg, the creator of the show, left. I have not watched many of the newer seasons but it seems geared to a MUCH younger audience.

Growing up with Spongebob as a kid, my friends and I all loved the show. The goofy characters and wacky scenarios was great entertainment for kids. After getting older, I stopped watching the show, thinking it was just a silly kids show and nothing more.

Re visiting Spongebob as an adult, I found myself hooked (no pun intended). Nostalgia aside, the episodes and world of Bikini Bottom are extremley creative, with characters that are relateable at all ages.

For example, when I was younger, I related more with Spongebob and Patrick, being loud, carefree, and doing fun things, while the old grouch Squidward complained and nagged about everything.

Now being older, I can really relate more to Squidward; Spongebob and Patrick seem more of a nuisance (in a funny way) while Squidward is just the mature neighbor trying to enjoy some peace and quiet. Only in adulthood can you really understand where old Squid is coming from with his frustrations at his childish neighbors.

The morals each episode had were nothing groundbreaking or elaborate, but they didnt need to be. Although for a kids show they were surprisingly subtle. "Squirrel Jokes" is a perfect example, tackling the pretty nuanced subject of racial and ethnic jokes. Its executed to perfection as in the end, instead of simply apologizing to Sandy for making squirrel jokes, Spongebob goes back on stage to make fun of fish, crabs, sponges, and all other sea creature "races", showing that no ethnicity should be above "offensive" humor. An episode with a message that only seems to grow more relevant with time.

All in all, this show (seasons 1-4 as mentioned before) is nothing short of an absolute classic, with laughs and lessons abundant throughout each season. Its easier said than done to create something for both kids and adults to equally enjoy, but Spongebob pulls it off masterfully, setting the standard high for cartoons and kids shows alike.

Dog Soldiers (2002)

A Fun Ride From Start to Finish

[9/10 · 25 September 2018]

Dog Soldiers is pure popcorn entertainment and its one of my all time favorites. The great mix of comedy and action is very well done for how low its budget seemed to be. The performances were fantastic, especially Liam Cunningham's (captain Ryan) one evil expression he maintains throught the movie. Tremendous.

The film's heavily inspired by Aliens but I honestly didn't mind. It came off as the homage it was intended to be and not a ripoff. From "Short, controlled, bursts" to the creatures cutting the power, its a great nod to one of the best "marines surrounded by smart beasts" movies ever.

There are of course small plot holes and cheesy lines, but the charisma of the actors completley overrides all of that. They are giving it thier all and really having fun with it. It shows throughout the film.

A side note, I also appreciated the cheeky not-so-subtle foreshadowing with Cooper being told to kill the dog in the start of the film. Little does he know the amount of "dogs" he would be killing later.

All in all, this films great entertainment, and should be given a fair chance by all movie fans. You wont regret it!

Star Wars: Episode VIII - The Last Jedi (2017)

Pretentious Drivel

[2/10 · 13 September 2018]

Im not sure where to even begin with this film. Never was a massive star wars fan, but I could get some enjoyment out of Lucas' films. What he lacked in his own writing abilities, he would more than make up for it with his sheer creativity. His effort and love for what he made showed in his films and people could connect more with it. The old Star Wars' themes were always subtle, and treated its audience with respect for thier intelligence.

With that being said, this Disney Star Wars movie is awful. The only enjoyment you will get out of it is the laughter from the 'plot' and the now infamous space scene. You know the one.

What baffles me is how this got off of the ground to begin with. The film treats its audience like simpletons, spelling its theme out and banging it over our heads again and again. Save the animals. Love not war. Ok but did you have to have characters say it out loud for us? Disney's themes have never been subtle, but at least they made some sort of sense in the context of childrens movies.

The plot holes are enourmous. Im usually the one who can suspend my disbelief, especially for star wars, but nothing made any sense in this movie. Not that the plot was even interesting or made sense to begin with. At one point, our heroes get caught because they parked thier spaceship in the wrong place. Our heroes sure are loveable and smart.

The ending was laughable. Rose risks killing both her and Finn for "love", something that was never apparent to begin with. What happened to the love interest between Finn and Rey? Guess thats all out the window. Lukes death is also laughable considering his character has always been a staple of the franchise. Its embarassing really, to do this to your own fans.

Im convinced Rian Johnsons never seen any Star wars movies before. A lighthearted space adventure film series has been turned into a pretentious preach fest, filled with plot canyons and downright hateable characters. I give it 2 stars for high production value/effects and moments of laughing until you cry. Watch it for free on Netflix with your friends and I promise you will laugh many times the whole way through.

Ash vs Evil Dead (2015–2018)

An Ample Series, But Not Without Drawbacks

[7/10 · 12 September 2018]

As a massive fan of the evil dead trilogy, I loved this series. It really did hit all the right notes for the those who adored the original movies, and with an even better production value, theres much entertainment to be found within all 3 seasons. Ash is back, and more badass and sarcastic than ever before. However, placing my inner fanboy aside now, there were some issues that became more and more apparent as the seasons progressed.

My main gripe with the series is that it takes itself very seriously at times. When there are scary scenes the show plays them straight. What made the movies wonderful for me was how cartooney it all was. Even with the violence and gore, it was comical and played more for laughs. You were laughing because of the absurdity of it all. Rarely were you supposed to be actually frightened by the things happening on screen. The series has some dark moments that dont fit the tone that the films had, and they seem out of place and forced.

Also there were too many side characters. It was painfully obvious who was to be cannon fodder for demons later on. Most of the time the side characters stay on the sidelines with not much to do while Ash reeks havoc. I always thought of Ash as the lone wolf with his burden to bear of killing demons, but I guess times change. A small complaint but something that became worse as the seasons progressed.

All in all it's still a great series with scenes of laughs and violence alike, especially for fans of the movies. Its great to see Bruce back with the chainsaw, but in the end it will only leave you wanting to rewatch the old classics.

Army of Darkness (1992)

Hail to the King, Baby

[10/10 · 20 June 2012]

If you have seen the previous installments, the Evil Dead 1 and 2, you know what to expect from this movie. If you haven't, prepared to be shocked and impressed.

When I first saw Army of Darkness I had not seen the previous installments in the loosely called 'series'. I had no expectations, but right from the start of the film, it becomes clear that you are to relax, free your mind, and laugh as hard as you can.

Army of Darkness has no flaws in my opinion. It is perfectly paced and this is the role Bruce Campbell was born to play. The film sets a unique tone that not many movies can. It focuses more on comedy than gore unlike it's predecessors, but it works well in it's favor.

Once you watch it, you will have unlimited quotes to use with your friends. I still quote it to this day, and its been 20 years later. If you don't see this movie, you haven't lived life yet. Gimmie some sugar, baby.