turdburglar Reviews

Masters of Horror (2005–2007)

The series thus far...

[2 December 2005]

Well, here we are and we are 5 episodes in. It is way to early to start bashing, but here's how its going so far:

episode 1 "incident on and off a country road" was excellent, and probably the best so far. Moonface is an inspired killer and this would make a great franchise. A little contrived but still pretty good. 8.5/10

episode 2 "dreams in the witch house" Stuart Gordon/ HP Lovecraft adaptation. Another good entry. Cool old house. 8/10

episode 3 "dance of the dead" Tobe Hooper... not so good. Sounds good on paper... zombies... end of the world... Robert Englund... sounds great, doesn't it? Not so much. What is with that pacing, Tobe? It's the end of the world so let's watch these teenagers drive around... 3/10

episode 4 "jennifer" Dario Argento. Not really scary, but enormously amusing as we watch Steven Weber become enraptured with the mysterious Jennifer (What does he see in this girl?... I know!) 5/10 (just for the humor)

episode 5 "chocolate" Mick Garris. This one had an interesting (albeit not terribly horrific) plot. Could've done A LOT more with it but keeps you entertained. 6/10

Overall, there has been plenty of blood and guts and nudity. Horror fans will be pleased. Not all episodes have been great, but the potential is definitely there. As each episode is from a different writer/director, I wouldn't make any generalizations or give up on this one. Tonight's Joe Dante episode should be very interesting! And they're already planning a season 2! Thanks Mick Garris and thank you Showtime.

The Idiot Box (1991–1992)

Awesome show...

[19 June 2005]

Somehow, this show made it on the air for about six episodes. Written and directed by Alex Winter/ Tom Stern, this show was wild, subversive humor at its best. Featuring the MTV contest, "Win a chance to sacrifice your daughter to GWAR!", that ought to be an indication as to the type of humor on the show. Also, this was back when shows on MTV HAD to be music orientated (anyone else remember this?), so the show was played around the popular music videos of the day. This led to the running gag of many of the characters saying to Alex, "Just play the damn videos!" Hopefully this show will see the light of day on DVD, I know there is a petition for those of you who care...

So, let's all take a moment of silence and fondly remember Eddie the Flying Gimp, Lockjaw, Willard Schrek, the Burrowing Bishop, and that new show "Who's a Total Idiot?" starring Tony Danza!

Freaked (1993)

Sure glad that wasn't OUR plane!

[10/10 · 9 June 2005]

I can't give this movie a high enough rating! I was a fan of Alex and Tom when they did the show "The Idiot Box" on MTV (one of the few who saw this), and this movie was just a natural extension of that show. If you have never seen this and have a twisted sense of humor like I do, you will love this movie. I won't rehash the plot, but I think that for me, every joke works and this is one of my all-time favorite cult movies. Randy Quaid is brilliant as Elijah C. Skuggs, the redneck proprietor of Freekland. And Alex Winter turns in a great performance in his last starring role. Thankfully "Freaked" is going to be released on DVD on July 12th. Thank you Anchor Bay! So, if you haven't been able to find this movie or catch it on cable, you will have your chance soon enough and I highly recommend it.

Oh yeah, how many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb? TWO: One to screw it in and one to ride my RODNEY!