ashfan-162-502118 Reviews

Immortals (2011)

Utter Drivel

[1/10 · 8 March 2012]

This is quite possibly the worst film I have ever seen. There is no logic to the "plot", much of the action takes place in near-total darkness, there is no tension or drama and events happen without explanation, rhyme or reason. This travesty seeks to emulate classics such as "Jason And The Argonauts" to the extent that an early "action sequence" has the appearance of a Ray Harryhausen stop-motion scene but any similarity ends there.

In short it is a total mess.

Do not under any circumstances rent, buy, download, stream or view this nonsense - however young you may be life is simply too short to waste any of it on this train wreck of a film. Not so much a Greek myth as a total Greek mess.

The Passing (2011)

Utter Dross

[16 September 2011]

Meaningless drivel that makes a mockery of the horror genre. It says a lot about this film that veteran actor Paul Gleason died in 2006, yet this apology for a movie was not released until 2011.

I am tempted to say that this movie was one of the worst I have ever seen, but that would give it kudos it does not deserve. There is little that is good about this movie, except perhaps that it is less than ninety minutes long. Unfortunately that is about eighty-nine minutes too long. In fairness the thumping rock soundtrack is reasonably good but the acting, script and direction are all woeful.

If you are tempted to watch this movie, resist it at all costs. Do something more rewarding, like sticking needles in your eyes or pulling out your finger nails - both are far more enjoyable than sitting through this unmitigated trash.