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Reviews
Diabolical (2022)
An Inconsistent but Ultimately Worthwhile Animated Anthology (Episodic Review)
Episode 1: A decent opening to the series. Classic animation, with zero dialogue heavily relying on physical humor and cartoon logic. Decently humorous and dark, with a sweet relationship between the scientist and the baby at the center. Seems to rely a bit too heavily on the shock value of extreme gore juxtaposed against the Looney Toons-esque animation, but overall a solid beginning. 7/10.
Episode 2: Second worst in the anthology. It starts with an interesting idea, "what happens to the supes who develop useless powers?" but does little with that concept. It more acts as a vehicle so they can show a guy with giant breasts instead of a face graphically murdering his parents. Rarely funny and relies way too heavily on trying to be edgy over being good. 4/10.
Episode 3: Personal favorite episode. Shows a much more comic-accurate depiction of the world, with Hughie voiced by Simon Pegg, and an appearance by Jack from Jupiter, a member of the Seven who was replaced by Translucent for the show. Expertly shows both how intelligent and sadistic Butcher can be when taking out Supes, as well as the classic Boys theme of the Supes being awful people lying to the public for attention. Great writing, great voice work, excellent episode all around. 10/10, I'd love an entire show made like this episode.
Episode 4: An interesting change of pace, exploring the age of social media stars using the Boys universe as a background, instead of directly exploring the ramifications of that world. It's pretty predictable and not at all subtle in its messaging, but it still manages to be interesting and engaging. And the ending twist is an excellent combination of both brutal and funny in an extremely dark way. 8/10.
Episode 5: Genuinely awful. A disgusting concept (and not in a fun way) that the creators seemed to think was way funnier than it was. It's like they took a character too stupid to make it into Episode 2 (which is saying a lot) and decided to dedicate an entire episode to it. Awful dialogue as well, and probably the worst voice acting in the series. Only slight positive is a decent adaptation of the show version of the Deep. 2/10.
Episode 6: Probably the most average episode, though most seemed to like this episode more than me. Don Cheadle is amazing as Nubian Prince, and it's a nice look at how rough domestic life as a Vought super hero can be, especially with the pressure to stick to the script taking precedence over personal relationships. The examination of a child trying to prevent her parents from divorcing is an excellent example of real-world problems with a superhero twist that is a main draw of the Boys. Main issue is the prominently featured Groundhawk. Although he's not a terrible character, his voice acting was a bit grating and a lot of the humor stemming from him felt very forced. Excellent concepts and acceptable execution, but doesn't reach the heights of some other episodes. 6/10.
Episode 7: Probably the most tryhard episode. Depressing look at an old man desperate to cure his wife of her cancer, and the lengths and risks he goes to in pursuit of this goal, his elation when he thinks he's saved her, and the acceptance when he loses her again. By far the most serious episode, with essentially zero lighthearted moments. The episode description perfectly sums this one up, directly telling the audience to "Put on you crying face." An emotional episode where the creators tried to force the empathy a bit too hard, but not enough to heavily detract from the experience. 7/10.
Episode 8: Another very comic-accurate episode, and the second darkest behind 7. Explore's Homelanders childhood and his debut as a superhero, using a plot point heavily featured in the comics. He began genuinely wanting and trying to be a good hero, protecting life and preventing violence. However, his complete lack of training and knowledge combined with the trauma of his upbringing causes more and more mistakes that push his mind closer to the breaking point, and causing yet more violence as he tries to hide his failings. Antony Starr shines here bringing out the conflict in the character. Although it doesn't have the highest body count, the use of gore is perhaps at its best here, showing what Homelander can do to a human body when he isn't careful enough in all its graphic detail. A bit too serious for the Boys universe with not enough dark humor, but that's entirely a personal preference and not the fault of the episode at all. 9/10.
Hellboy (2019)
Lots of great individual moments, poor overarching film
I do think that a lot of reviews were a bit unfair to this movie. While definitely not as good as I'd like it to be, it's also not a blight upon humanity like so many reviews led me to believe. On the positive side, it's definitely an entertaining movie. While the hardcore gore and constant cursing turned some people off, I found it to be more faithful to the world of Hellboy than the tamer del Toro movies (It's a movie about a half-demon fighting creatures from Hell; yeah, it's gonna get graphic). David Harbour is great in the lead role, nailing the few character scene this movie gives him while being consistently entertaining and just fun to watch throughout. The monster designs are very creative and unique, especially the demon designs during the London assault scene near the end. It was just disappointing they weren't utilized more. The fight scenes are overall very enjoyable, generally considering of quick and brutal action without utilizing the infamous MCU approach of cutting way too quickly to actually keep track of what's going on.
Unfortunately, there are a lot of very valid criticisms of this movie. It goes way too fast, trying to cram in so many pieces of the comic lore into way too short a timeframe. If you're not familiar with the source material, good luck keeping up. The movie presents a lot of interesting themes, but due to how unbelievably overstuffed it is none of the topics (or any other aspect of the movie) is given enough time to be explored or develop. It's more a mishmash of great individual ideas that are swept away before their potential can be even somewhat fulfilled. The CGI, while not egregiously terrible, usually ranges from adequate to sub-par. I was rarely distracted by blatant VFX shots, but I don't recommend looking too closely either. Outside of Harbour, I found the acting to be pretty mediocre overall, though I think that's more due to the blistering pace not giving the characters any real time in the spotlight than the talent involved. The direction and shot composition is similar to the CGI. It's passable, but nothing amazing.
Overall, this is a movie that you need to get on board with to enjoy. The bottom line is that there's just too much going on to give this movie the slightest chance to tell a compelling narrative. However, taking each scene at face value reveals a lot of great individual moments that should keep you entertained until the end.
Onward (2020)
Fairly Standard Pixar Movie, until that ending...
For most of the movie, I remember thinking this movie was a fairly standard Pixar movie. It was fun and funny, there were enjoyable characters, a good mix of emotion and goofiness, etc. but it also felt like something was lacking to keep it from the heights of their greatest works. Then that ending sucker punches you in the face with all of the emotions.
Without giving away how it happens, the way each brother's arc in dealing with their father's death ends is nothing short of beautiful. It perfectly highlights how both struggled with it in different ways and how they can finally move past it. It also compliments the development of their sibling bond as well, putting a punctuation mark on the adventure that drew them together and letting them deal with their grief while setting up their new relationship going forward and how they've learned to depend on each other's strengths while simultaneously accepting the others weakness.
A few other random thoughts: Really good voice work throughout. Obviously Pratt and Holland were the main draws but pretty much every character is very well voiced (especially Spencer as the Manticore). I really enjoyed how the stepfather was a pseudo secondary antagonist without being the normal douchebag stepfather stereotype. He legitimately cared about them and wanted to protect them, as did their mother who turned out to be a total badass. The world building was decent (it definitely did the whole "Fantasy creatures in a modern setting" thing better than Bright), though it did bother me how everyone stopped using magic and then it's just brought back so easily. Finally, wow does this movie want to make me try DnD for the first time.
The Witcher (2019)
Frustratingly close to being great
I should note, I'm reviewing this as someone who's never played the games nor read the books. This may be the biggest gripe I have with the show, as it feels like it assumes you're familiar with the world. At the end of the season I still have no idea how big the Continent is, how many kingdoms and species are within it, nor what its history is (they keep referring to past events like "the convergence of the spheres" and similar as if I'm supposed to have any idea what that is). Unlike Game of Thrones (which this show is clearly trying to emulate), magic is at the absolute forefront of this series. However, it never gives you a proper idea how it works outside a few hints. There's very few rules established for the practice, and there's never a clear sense of what magic can and cannot do. Curses pop up out of nowhere, and the way they're dismissed is straight out of a fairytale.
However, the moment-to-moment writing in this show is very enjoyable, especially with Cavill giving us an incredible character to follow. Although many were annoyed by the lack of clarity in the shows storyline, I found it to be an enjoyable mystery that drew me into the world. Again, however, I never felt rewarded for getting invested in the world as I still have no idea how this world works.
As expected from a show following in GoT's footsteps, this is an extremely mature show. Although it feels like it slips a bit too far into nudity for nudity's sake at points, it generally handles this maturity well. This extends to the fight scenes, as well. They're every bit as graphic and brutal as you'd expect, and most are exceedingly well choreographed and performed.
The individual stories contained in each episode are generally enjoyable. Unfortunately, the overarching story is much less so. Far too many episodes feel straight out of video game side quests, with the main story told in very brief intervals throughout the season. This leads to the main story feeling unimportant and rushed. The writers feel more like they want us to enjoy the daily adventures of Gerald rather than the epic struggle over a young girl's immense power than the main story depicts. Again, this leads to a lot of extremely enjoyable individual moments but never a wholly unified experience.
In summary, this was a show that somehow managed to be both extremely fun to watch and just as equally frustrating. It has all the ingredients to make an excellent show, but just never manages to put it all together into something truly special.
Artemis Fowl (2020)
A terrible movie and an even worse adaptation
As a movie, this would probably be a 4/10 for me. There's some decent visuals but its storyline is messy and confusing, characters are impossible to care about and the dialogue is very awkward. If you've never read or don't care about the books, this one should be avoided unless you're watching it with a child.
Reviewing this as a nostalgic lover of the books though...just don't watch this. It's not worth the curiosity. They took the first two books, smashed them together with a hammer, blended them, and crapped out this movie, served with a huge helping of Random Unnecessary Plot McGuffin. Almost every scene is taken from one of the two books, but altered to be more confusing, dumb and frustrating than anything from Colfer. They don't really explain how anything works. Fairy magic is barely explained (or even used, other than healing), the Rules are brushed over extremely quickly and they keep alluding to the battle between fairies and humans without actually explaining what happened. Then there's the Aculos, a completely random magical device with absolutely no defined power that turns out to have been in Fowl Manor all along and Holly uses it perfectly to solve all the conflicts in the movie with no problems. And somehow thats not even the worst part. The characters are downright atrocious. Artemis isnt even a criminal (and also athletic for some dumb reason), his dad knows about faires and works with them to save the world, his mother is just dead, Holly is focused on redeeming her father who worked with Artemis' dad, Mulch is the most annoying and unneeded narrator ever, Root is decent but doesn't do much, Butler is just kind of there and Juliet and Foaly barely exist. Opal Koboi is supposedly behind everything but all you see is a shadow with a 3-pack-a-day voice who never does anything in the story besides be a totally generic villain who hardly ever is onscreen and barely interacts with the rest of the cast. Definitely one of the worst book adaptations I've seen, if not the absolute worst