How I Met Your Mother (TV Series)

The Locket (2013)

Cristin Milioti: Tracy McConnell

Quotes 

• The Mother : Hey, are you okay? You look stressed. Plus, you muttered a few words out loud. I heard "lonely" and "unicorn", which actually gave me a great idea for a children's book, so... thank you. Are you okay?

  Lily Aldrin : No, but there's nothing you can do.

  The Mother : Do you wanna cookie?

  [Offers a container of cookies] 

  Lily Aldrin : Yes... yes I do!

  [Grabs a cookie] 

  The Mother : Whoa! You just took a cookie from a complete stranger on a train. I like how trusting you are. There could be drugs or poison in there.

  Lily Aldrin : [With her mouth full]  But there's not, is there?

  The Mother : No idea, I found them under my seat.

  [Lily spits out cookie] 

  The Mother : No! Kidding! Sorry! You looked stressed so I thought you could use a cookie and then I thought you could use a joke, I should have stopped at the cookie.

  Lily Aldrin : You know what? I don't care if these are poisoned. There's chocolate and peanut butter and caramel in these sumbitches.

  The Mother : I call them sumbitches!

  Narrator : ...And that's how Lily met your mother.

• The Mother : [about Ted's slow driving]  That would drive me crazy. I would give him an embarrassing nickname until he stops driving like a little girl.

  Narrator : It was Lady Tedwina Slowsby. And it worked.

• The Mother : I know I'm just a stranger on a train you tried to bite... but do you want a hug?