The Big Bang Theory (TV Series)
The Transporter Malfunction (2012)
Johnny Galecki: Leonard Hofstadter
Photos
Quotes
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Leonard Hofstadter : Once you open the box, it loses its value.
Penny : Yeah, yeah. My mom gave me the same lecture about my virginity. Gotta tell you, it was a lot more fun taking it out and playing with it.
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Sheldon Cooper : Quantum physics makes me so happy.
Leonard Hofstadter : Yeah? I'm glad.
Sheldon Cooper : It's like looking at the universe naked.
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Penny : Tada!
Sheldon Cooper : A vintage, mint in box 1975 Mego Star Trek Transporter, with real transporter action. Hotdarn!
Leonard Hofstadter : Where did you get that?
Penny : That's from Stuart at the comic book store.
Leonard Hofstadter : You went to the comic book store by yourself?
Penny : Yeah! It was fun. I walked in and two different guys got asthma attacks. Felt pretty good.
Sheldon Cooper : This calls for an expression of gratitude.
Penny : Ooh, am I about to get a rare, Sheldon Cooper hug?
Sheldon Cooper : No, not this time, then they wouldn't be special.
[makes a finger-gun gesture]
Sheldon Cooper : Thanks, Penny!
Penny : You're welcome. Don't worry, I didn't forget about you. Leonard, I got you... a label maker!
Leonard Hofstadter : Ahh... No, it's great. Also... it's mint in box.
Penny : And... I got you a transporter too!
Leonard Hofstadter : Awesome!
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Raj Koothrappali : All right, uh, fine. I'm coming and I'm bringing somebody. Koothrappali plus one.
Leonard Hofstadter : Who are you bringing?
Raj Koothrappali : [Defensively] Who are *you* bringing?
Penny : He's bringing me. And who are you bringing?
Raj Koothrappali : Wow, what a bunch of nosy O'Donnells!
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Sheldon Cooper : It was me. I opened your toy... discovered it was broken, and didn't tell you.
Leonard Hofstadter : Why would you open mine?
Sheldon Cooper : I didn't, that was a lie. I opened my own toy... and it was already broken, so I switched them.
Leonard Hofstadter : Well, you should talk to Stuart.
Sheldon Cooper : I can't because that was a lie. Yours was broken in an earthquake and that's a lie.
Penny : What is the truth?
Sheldon Cooper : My Mr. Spock doll came to me in a dream and forced me to open it, and when the toy broke I switched it for yours. Later he encouraged me to do the right thing and I defied him. And then I was attacked by a Gorn.
Leonard Hofstadter : Okay, that I believe.
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Sheldon Cooper : And, Leonard, even though I don't have one anymore, I hope you have fun playing with it.
Leonard Hofstadter : And that's a lie, right?
Sheldon Cooper : A big fat whopper. I hope it breaks.
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Sheldon Cooper : I hate wedding receptions. I wish the bride and groom would take a cue from Bilbo Baggins; slip on the ring, disappear, and everyone goes home.
Leonard Hofstadter : Mmmm, you liked Professor Geyster's wedding.
Sheldon Cooper : They had a make-your-own-sundae bar. Oh, that was a night to remember. D'you know, on one trip, I just had a bowl of nuts.
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Sheldon Cooper : Knock Knock.
Leonard Hofstadter : Who's there?
Sheldon Cooper : Interrupting physicist.
Leonard Hofstadter : Interrupting physi...
Sheldon Cooper : Muon!