The Big Bang Theory (TV Series)

The Vacation Solution (2012)

Melissa Rauch: Bernadette Rostenkowski

Quotes 

• Penny : I'm so glad you talked Howard out of having your wedding invitations in Klingon.

  Bernadette Rostenkowski : Turn it over. I'm hoping my relatives think it's Hebrew.

• [last lines] 

  Bernadette Rostenkowski : Are you mad at me?

  Howard Wolowitz : No. I'm not mad at you; I just wish you would have come to me so I didn't have to hear it through the nerd-vine.

  Bernadette Rostenkowski : So, what are we going to do?

  Howard Wolowitz : You really want me to sign a pre-nup?

  Bernadette Rostenkowski : I don't know. My dad's pretty insistent on it though.

  Howard Wolowitz : Why don't I talk to your dad? Man to man.

  Bernadette Rostenkowski : Really? Ah, that'd be so great

  Howard Wolowitz : Done.

  Bernadette Rostenkowski : I should probably give you a heads up about a couple things. Even though he's retired from the police force, he still carries his gun. But don't worry, he wont shoot it; it's more of a fashion statement.

  Howard Wolowitz : Okay.

  Bernadette Rostenkowski : And just to be safe, when you talk to him don't bring up Jimmy Carter, gardeners, foreign people, homosexuals, Sean Penn, Vatican II, gun control, organic food, the designated hitter rule, recycling or the fact that you're Jewish.

  Howard Wolowitz : Got it, got it. Will you email me that list?

  Bernadette Rostenkowski : So the thing to watch for: if he's shouting at you, you're okay, but if he starts to get real quiet leave as quickly as you can without making eye contact. Not in a straight line; throw some zigs and zags in there.

  Howard Wolowitz : Y'know, th- this isn't that pressing. Why don't I talk to him about it in May?

  Bernadette Rostenkowski : In May you're going to be on the International Space Station.

  Howard Wolowitz : They got phones.

• Penny : I'm a believer in breaking bad news to a guy when you're in bed. That's how I told my high school boyfriend I slept with his brother. That's how I told his brother the same thing.

  Bernadette Rostenkowski : I don't know. I don't wanna manipulate him with sex.

  Penny : Oh, sweetie, that's what sex is for.