The Big Bang Theory (TV Series)

The Recombination Hypothesis (2012)

Jim Parsons: Sheldon Cooper

Photos 

Quotes 

• Sheldon Cooper : [Sheldon discovers he's received the wrong cardboard cut-out Spock]  Oh no! They sent the wrong Spock! Live long and suck it, Zachary Quinto!

• Sheldon Cooper : Now, back to our game.

  Raj Koothrappali : You were in the middle of an erection.

  Sheldon Cooper : Oh, of course! It's right here in my hand.

• Sheldon Cooper : I want to build a road, but I need wood. Either of you fellows have wood?

  [Raj and Howard snicker] 

  Sheldon Cooper : I don't understand the laughter. The object of "Settlers of Catan" is to build roads and settlements. To do so requires wood. Now I have sheep; I need wood. Who has wood for my sheep?

• Sheldon Cooper : Now, where were we? Oh, yes. Does anyone have any wood?

  [Raj and Howard laugh] 

  Sheldon Cooper : Oh, come on! I just want wood! Why are you making it so hard?

  [Raj and Howard laugh harder] 

• Sheldon Cooper : And now that I have some wood, I'm going to begin the erection of my settlements.

  Raj Koothrappali : [sotto, to Wolowitz]  He's got to be doing this on purpose.

• Sheldon Cooper : O-o-oh, my life-size cardboard Mr. Spock is here! I know he wouldn't care for an outburst of human emotion, but oh goody, oh goody, oh goody!

• Sheldon Cooper : The reason you're fixated on a good-natured simpleton like Penny is that she's the exact opposite of your first romantic attachment - your brilliant yet intimidating mother.

  Leonard Hofstadter : Where on earth did you get that from?

  Sheldon Cooper : It's in her book, "Needy Baby, Greedy Baby".

  Leonard Hofstadter : That doesn't make it true.

  Sheldon Cooper : It's called non-fiction for a reason, Leonard.

• Sheldon Cooper : Leonard, promise me that when our new waitress comes over, you will not start a complicated on-again-off-again relationship with her, because I'm very, very hungry.

• Howard Wolowitz : Ooh, 8:30. You and Penny decide to go out and paint the town beige?

  Leonard Hofstadter : You're 30 years old and you live with your mother!

  Raj Koothrappali : I guess it didn't go well.

  Sheldon Cooper : Now, we don't know that. Not to a certainty. All we know is that Leonard is home.

  [Leonard groans loudly from his room] 

  Howard Wolowitz : How about now?

  Sheldon Cooper : Again, not enough evidence. For all we know, he's being murdered.

• [first lines] 

  Leonard Hofstadter : Feel like trying something new for dinner? Maybe indian? Tex-Mex?

  Sheldon Cooper : You ever wonder how humans would be different if they evolved from lizards instead of amammals?

  Leonard Hofstadter : Okay, let's talk about that.

  Sheldon Cooper : As you know, lizards, cold-blooded animals, lack the ability to sense temperature, but they do move more sluggishly when it's cold. So, lizard weathermen would say things like, "Bring a sweater. It's slow outside". I love my mind.

  Leonard Hofstadter : We all do. Now, how about dinner?

  Sheldon Cooper : Oh, I would assume we'd enjoy insects, or smaller lizards. We could also pull each other's tails off and grill them; they'll just grow back.

• Sheldon Cooper : You want to know my opinion?

  Leonard Hofstadter : [Sarcastic]  Oh boy, do I!

  Sheldon Cooper : [to Howard]  Sarcasm?

  Howard Wolowitz : [Spiteful]  No.

• Sheldon Cooper : After you used the facilities at the gas station, did you make a purchase?

  Leonard Hofstadter : What?

  Sheldon Cooper : It's customary when using the restroom at a retail establishment to make a small purchase. Did you?

  Leonard Hofstadter : No.

  Sheldon Cooper : [snorts]  Here's two dollars. Go buy some beef jerky.

  Leonard Hofstadter : I don't want beef jerky.

  Sheldon Cooper : It's not about *you*. It's about a poor immigrant from Pakistan trying to make his way in America by working the graveyard shift at the Colorado Boulevard Chevron.