The Big Bang Theory (TV Series)

The Large Hadron Collision (2010)

Johnny Galecki: Leonard Hofstadter

Photos 

Quotes 

• Penny : You actually put that in an agreement!

  Leonard Hofstadter : Uh, yeah. We also put in what happens if one of us wins a MacArthur Grant, or if one of us gets superpowers, of if one of us is bitten by a zombie.

  Sheldon Cooper : He can't kill me even if I turn.

  Penny : Is there anything in there about if one of you gets a girlfriend?

  Sheldon Cooper : No, that seemed a little far-fetched.

• Sheldon Cooper : I've been dreaming about going to the Large Hadron Collider since I was nine years old.

  Leonard Hofstadter : Yeah? Well, I've been dreaming about spending Valentine's Day with a girl since I was six.

  Sheldon Cooper : Shame on you! That's no dream for a scientist!

• Leonard Hofstadter : I know what'll cheer you up; let's play one of your driving games.

  Sheldon Cooper : All right. This game is called 'Traitors'. I will name three historical figures; you put them in order of the heinousness of their betrayal. Benedict Arnold, Judas, Doctor Leonard Hofstadter.

  Leonard Hofstadter : You really think I belong with Benedict Arnold and Judas?

  Sheldon Cooper : You're right; Judas had the decency to hang himself after what he did.

• Leonard Hofstadter : Come on, what would you guys do if you were me?

  Howard Wolowitz : I'd take Sheldon to Switzerland.

  Leonard Hofstadter : Seriouly?

  Howard Wolowitz : Absolutely. And I'd leave him there.

• [last lines] 

  Raj Koothrappali : Oh my goodness, look at this room.

  [gasps] 

  Raj Koothrappali : Champagne! Roses! Oh, and little chocolates! This is going to be the best Valentine's day ever.

  Leonard Hofstadter : Yeah, I forgot about all this.

  Raj Koothrappali : But I never will.

• Leonard Hofstadter : [awoken by sounds of Penny vomiting]  What's going on?

  Penny : [sarcastic]  I'm having a tea party. What do you think's going on?

  [sounds of Penny hocking up phlegm] 

  Penny : I think I might have the flu.

  [sounds of more vomiting] 

  Penny : Or the plague.

  Leonard Hofstadter : Well, our plane leaves at 9:00 a.m. Do you think you'll feel better by then?

  Penny : [sounds of more vomiting]  Yeah, 'cause I'm gonna be dead!

• Sheldon Cooper : Round two: Leonard Hofstadter, Darth Vader, Rupert Murdoch.

  Leonard Hofstadter : Rupert Murdoch?

  Sheldon Cooper : He owns Fox and they cancelled Firefly. Hint: he and Darth Vader are tied for number two.

• [Sheldon places a tray of cutlery in front of Leonard and leaves] 

  Raj Koothrappali : What the hell is that?

  Leonard Hofstadter : Uh, let's see... Yeah, thirty pieces of silverware.

• Penny : Okay, what's the big surprise?

  Leonard Hofstadter : Just a minute. This tray contains clues as to what you and I are going to be doing on Valentine's Day.

  Penny : Oh. Wow. Okay. Let's see. We've got, uh, milk chocolate, Swiss cheese, fondue... My lactose-intolerant boyfriend is going to eat all this, then I'm going to climb on his back and rocket to the moon?

  Leonard Hofstadter : No. But it does involve air travel. Okay, um, let me slice this *Swiss* cheese with my *Swiss* army knife, and then *you* can wash it down with a cup of *Swiss* Miss instant cocoa.

  Penny : Okay, I'm starting to think Swiss is key here.

  Leonard Hofstadter : Uh-huh.

  Penny : We're going to Disneyland and ride the Matterhorn.

  Leonard Hofstadter : How does that involve air travel?

  Penny : We're going to Disney *World* and ride the Matterhorn!

  Leonard Hofstadter : No.

  Penny : Okay. Sweetie, this started out fun, but I'm over it.

  Leonard Hofstadter : We're going to Switzerland to see the CERN supercollider!

  [Penny looks at him blankly] 

  Leonard Hofstadter : And ski. We'll also go skiing.

  Penny : We're going skiing in Switzerland?

  Leonard Hofstadter : Well, you'll ski, I'll fall, but, yeah, we will be in Switzerland for Valentine's Day.

  Penny : Oh, my God! Leonard, that's incredible!

• Sheldon Cooper : Help me out. Which ski hat says, "Après Super Collider"?

  Leonard Hofstadter : Sheldon, I'm not taking you to Switzerland.

  Sheldon Cooper : Well, of course you are. Who else would you take?

  Leonard Hofstadter : Penny.

  Sheldon Cooper : What? That's absurd. Penny has no interest in subatomic particle research.

  Leonard Hofstadter : Yes, but it'll be Valentine's Day. We can go sightseeing and skiing and make love in front of a roaring fire in the shadow of the snow-capped Alps.

  Sheldon Cooper : But Penny has no interest in subatomic particle research!

  Leonard Hofstadter : I'm sorry, Sheldon.

  Sheldon Cooper : Sorry? I've been dreaming about going to the Large Hadron Collider since I was 9 years old.

  Leonard Hofstadter : I've been dreaming about spending Valentine's with a girl since I was 6.

  Sheldon Cooper : Shame on you. That's no dream for a scientist.

• Sheldon Cooper : I made you breakfast. Juice, coffee, and pancakes in the shape of some of your favorite fictional characters. See, here's Frodo.

  Leonard Hofstadter : You made Frodo pancakes?

  Sheldon Cooper : Yeah, I used coconut shavings to do the hair on his feet.