Fri, Nov 13, 2009
Returning to Reading after boyfriend Sasha has dumped him Simon recalls how, when he undertook to compile a family tree as a school project, he discovered that his parents never actually got married and the 'wedding photo' was a doctored version of Princess Diana's wedding shoot. The truth was that both parents inadvertently stood the other up but they decide they will finally make it legal and Simon has designed a bridal gown for his mother to put Princess Diana's to shame. After the wedding sister Ashlene announces that she too is an unmarried mother and Aunty Hayley accidentally gets into bed with the groom.
Top-rated
Fri, Nov 20, 2009
In 1998 Simon and Kylie form a pop band called E-male and hunky music teacher Mr. Carr offers to manage them. To Simon's surprise, when his Dad invites taciturn new neighbour Ross Kemp to dinner, he brings his significant other, who happens to be Mr. Carr. The two men have a big bust-up but Mr.Carr still takes Simon and Kylie to Birmingham for the Eurovision Song Contest. The boys get locked in a toilet and are rescued by contest winner Dana International, with whom they also appear, by accident, on stage. Simon grabs a plume from Dana's costume and years later it's still on his Mum's hat, though when he meets Dana again in the street she is not keen to reacquaint herself with him.
Top-rated
Fri, Nov 27, 2009
Simon recalls the gardening frenzy of 1998 when, inspired by television programme, 'Ground Force',everyone wanted a water feature, including him. To raise the money for one he and Kylie work as Saturday boys in Monsieur Antoine's boutique, where they excel, until Aunty Hayley comes in for a bra fitting, which ends up taking place in the shop window. Inspired by hunky Tiger, Reba's personal trainer, the boys make their own fitness video, which leads to friction between Reba and Ashlene and the creation, by default, of Simon's very own water feature. Still, he gets to duet with Elaine Paige.
Top-rated
Fri, Dec 4, 2009
Simon ponders on his campness. Even as a baby he was singing show tunes. In 1998 the family is all set for its first holiday abroad. However, thanks to a poster campaign by Reba, annoyed when she thought Andy was making a pass at her, his business is halved and they cannot afford to go. Instead they tell everyone they are going abroad whilst creating their own holiday atmosphere indoors, eventually including Kylie, who rumbles them. When Reba's violent ex-husband turns up Kylie and his dog Madonna face up to and see him off, leading Simon to realise that 'campness' is seizing the moment.
Top-rated
Fri, Dec 11, 2009
When Reading's own prize-winning conceptual artist Stacey Bile runs Andy over,Debbie socks her - before becoming her drinking buddy and her muse, going to London with her to set up her new installation. But when Stacey starts to exploit her Debbie takes revenge and steals her Turner Prize certificate. Meanwhile Aunty Hayley teaches the boys Indian dancing, dispenses phone advice to Dannii Minogue and demolishes the statue of Reading's other famous daughter, Kate Winslet.
Top-rated
Fri, Dec 18, 2009
Bullied for being gay Simon decides to run away from Reading on the same night that Debbie is holding a party to celebrate her television acting debut in a crime reconstruction where she plays a woman missing from home, who is her exact double. However,thanks to a bus strike and the influence of the gorgeous Mickey - whom he will one day marry - Simon returns home in time to see Debbie punch Jackson, his chief tormentor, for impregnating Ashlene and picking on her son. Simon is so happy he falls off a wall and gets his gash, while the missing woman comes back to complain about Debbie's feeble impersonation of her.