Terence Rigby: Big Al

Quotes 

• Big Al : [Presenting files containing evidence of corruption]  This is about money changing hands to get planning permission to build a chip shop on the estate. This is about a well-known local businessman buying his way off a drunk driving charge. This is about a shopkeeper on the high street persuading your Mr Forrest that his dirty videotapes are actually as pure as the driven snow.

  Det. Sgt. Hobson : [Somewhat stunned]  Are all these authentic cases?

  Big Al : Yes. You've got signed statements from people involved around the margins.

  Det. Sgt. Hobson : [Anticipating a court case]  And are all these people prepared to give evidence?

  Big Al : Yes... providing you're not too proud to accept a bit of perjury here and there. It's all relative, isn't it?

• Big Al : [Waiting for the election result]  There are three possibilities: win, lose or draw.

  Trevor Chaplin : [Slightly patronizing, anticipating that Jill will not be victorious]  But to us, you'll always be the winner!

  Jill Swinburne : [Unappreciative of Trevor's so-called encouragement]  Bollocks!

• Radio newsreader : [Voiceover]  It has been confirmed that a major enquiry is going on into allegations of corruption in the police force and local government. A senior police officer has been suspended and also assisting in the enquiries are a well-known local businessman and a councillor and member of the Town Planning Committee.

  Little Norm : [Carrying a bundle of paperwork]  Got some more affidavits!

  Big Al : Not sure we're going to need them: sounds like it's all over bar the shouting.

  Little Norm : Pity - people really enjoy writing them once you explain what it's for... and when you tell them it's an affidavit. I reckon they like the sound of the word: 'affidavit'!

  Big Al : [Glancing through the testimonies]  Hey, there's some good stuff here!

  Little Norm : Tell you what: a lot of it's the truth!