Quotes
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Pointy-Haired Boss : Perhaps we need further research?
Dilbert : Yes!
Pointy-Haired Boss : Perhaps further study?
Dilbert : Yes!
Pointy-Haired Boss : Who's got time for that, you prig? No, we need to create some favorable facts first.
Dilbert : Favorable facts?
Pointy-Haired Boss : Yes. Favorable facts. The other kind are worthless.
Wally : We could flip a coin.
Pointy-Haired Boss : No, too risky.
Loud Howard : We could test humans. That's always fun.
Asok : What about monkeys? Or rabbits, or puppies? We've had some success hurting them in the past, haven't we?
Alice : Dilbert could do some tests on mice. Mice are full of favorable facts.
Pointy-Haired Boss : Very good. Mice it is.
Dilbert : This is ridiculous, but at least that's vaguely scientific. I'll need a budget to get some mice.
Pointy-Haired Boss : We're not PAYING for mice. Good God man the streets are full of them!
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Dogbert : I have discovered a heretofore undiagnosed condition.
Dilbert : There is no such thing as Chronic Cubicle Syndrome.
Dogbert : Initially victims exhibit denial.
Dilbert : But you have no proof.
Dogbert : Oh, I have something much better than proof. Anecdotal evidence!
Dogbert : Who do you think would be dumb enough to believe anecdotal evidence?
Dogbert : I've narrowed my target market to... PEOPLE!