Pointy-Haired Boss: Perhaps we need further research?
Pointy-Haired Boss: Perhaps further study?
Pointy-Haired Boss: Who's got time for that, you prig? No, we need to create some favorable facts first.
Dilbert: Favorable facts?
Pointy-Haired Boss: Yes. Favorable facts. The other kind are worthless.
Wally: We could flip a coin.
Pointy-Haired Boss: No, too risky.
Loud Howard: We could test humans. That's always fun.
Asok: What about monkeys? Or rabbits, or puppies? We've had some success hurting them in the past, haven't we?
Alice: Dilbert could do some tests on mice. Mice are full of favorable facts.
Pointy-Haired Boss: Very good. Mice it is.
Dilbert: This is ridiculous, but at least that's vaguely scientific. I'll need a budget to get some mice.
Pointy-Haired Boss: We're not PAYING for mice. Good God man the streets are full of them!
Dilbert: You can't publish a book about an unproven medical condition.
Dogbert: Apparently you haven't been to the book store lately.
Dogbert: I have discovered a heretofore undiagnosed condition.
Dilbert: There is no such thing as Chronic Cubicle Syndrome.
Dogbert: Initially victims exhibit denial.
Dilbert: But you have no proof.
Dogbert: Oh, I have something much better than proof. Anecdotal evidence!
Dogbert: Who do you think would be dumb enough to believe anecdotal evidence?
Dogbert: I've narrowed my target market to... PEOPLE!