NewsRadio (TV Series)

Bitch Session (1996)

Stephen Root: Jimmy James

Quotes 

• Dave : [confronting the staff]  Nobody has to tell me anything because... I was hiding under the desk the whole time!

  [the staff is upset at Dave's eavesdropping. Jimmy steps in] 

  Jimmy : Now, look, people, it doesn't matter whether...

  [pause] 

  Jimmy : Dave, you were under the desk the whole time? You didn't tell me that.

  Dave : Well, it was kind of unintentional, sir.

  Jimmy : Oh, I see, right. Now, look, people, it doesn't matter whether...

  [pause] 

  Jimmy : Actually, y'know what, this is all pretty pathetic. I'm gonna have to distance myself from you. I'll see ya, Dave.

• Jimmy : You're the boss, you're supposed to be thick-skinned.

  Dave : I am plenty thick-skinned.

  Jimmy : Come on, I've seen thicker skin on a bowl of pudding. Here, check this out.

  [Mr. James lays his hand over a lit candle] 

  Dave : Sir, you don't have to impress me.

  Jimmy : Wanna know the secret?

  Dave : Wild guess... Thick skin?

  Jimmy : Well, metaphysically, yes. Technically speaking, you do it fifteen, sixteen times, it kills all the nerve endings in your hand.

• Jimmy : Hey, Mike! Mike Eisner! That's Mike Eisner. Great guy, great guy. Got skin like a rhino.

  Dave : I think that's Mike Ovitz.

  Jimmy : Doesn't matter. They're all the same.

• Jimmy : Say, is your mom still married to that guy?

  Dave : You mean my dad?

  Jimmy : Yeah.

  Dave : I'm afraid so, sir.

  Jimmy : Well, if she ever changes her mind...