Three's Company (TV Series)
Jack's Uncle (1977)
Joyce DeWitt: Janet Wood
Photos
Quotes
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[first lines]
Chrissy Snow : [hurts herself doing needlework] Ow!
Janet Wood : [comes from kitchen, apple in hand] Chrissie...!
Chrissy Snow : Yeah?
Janet Wood : When you eat something, on what side do you chew on?
Chrissy Snow : [puzzled] The side that's nearest to me.
Janet Wood : [sits down next to Chrissy] You see, I was at the dentist, and he said that everybody chews on one side of the mouth more than the other.
[hands over apple]
Janet Wood : So, take a bite.
Chrissy Snow : Okay.
[takes apple, and Janet stares]
Chrissy Snow : Don't look at me.
Janet Wood : Huh?
Chrissy Snow : Well, I can't chew when you're looking at me. I feel really self-conscious.
[Janet turns around and Chrissy takes her time chewing]
Chrissy Snow : I chew straight up and down in the middle.
Janet Wood : Chrissy, that's ridiculous. Only rabbits chew in the middle. Take another bite!
Chrissy Snow : [gets stared at again] Don't look at me!
Janet Wood : I'm not looking, I'm observing!
Chrissy Snow : [still chewing] Well, I'll observe myself in the mirror.
[goes off to bathroom]
Janet Wood : [mimics] "I'll observe myself in the mirror!"
[folds arms impatiently at door]
Janet Wood : Well?
Chrissy Snow : [from bathroom] I chew on the left.
[doorbell rings]
Janet Wood : [doorbell rings] Mm?
Chrissy Snow : [comes out of bathroom] That's terrible!
Janet Wood : [as she goes to open door] Why?
Chrissy Snow : Well, it means one side of my mouth is gonna wear out before the other...
Janet Wood : [opens door] Oh, hi, Mrs. Roper.
Helen Roper : Hi, Janet.
Chrissy Snow : ...and by the time I'm thirty, I'm gonna be lopsided!
[aghast at prospect]
Helen Roper : [misunderstands anatomy involved] Look, honey, why don't you try just exercising with the other...?
[mimics breast-shaping exercises]