The Simpsons (TV Series)
Marge Simpson in: 'Screaming Yellow Honkers' (1999)
Hank Azaria: Superintendent Chalmers, Stan, Carl, Chief Wiggum, Moe Szyslak, Snake, Lou
Quotes
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Chalmers : Well, Seymour, it seems we've put together a baseball team, and I'm wondering, who's on first, eh?
Principal Skinner : Not the pronoun, but rather a player with the unlikely name of "Who" is on first.
Chalmers : Well that's just great, Seymour. We've been out here six seconds and you've already managed to blow the routine.
[Chalmers storms off]
Chalmers : [muttering under his breath] Sexless freak.
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Chief Wiggum : Do it for this adorable little puppy. Look at the puppy, Marge.
Marge : That's your hat.
Lou : She's good, chief.
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Lisa Simpson : How'd you know the plan would work, Mom?
Marge Simpson : Thanks for asking. Well, I was watching "Dateline", and Stone Phillips said SUVs always roll over when you turn sharply, and the gas tanks explode at the drop of a hat.
Zookeeper : And she also knew if a rhino sees a flame, he'll instinctively try to put it out.
Marge Simpson : Stone Phillips again!
Homer Simpson : Is there anything that guy doesn't know?
Zookeeper : Why this Stone Phillips sounds like quite a bloke! What television network is he on?
Bart Simpson : Why, NBC, of course!
Lisa Simpson : NBC has lots of great shows, and their news and sports coverage can't be beat!
Chief Wiggum : Do ya think there's anything great on NBC right now?
Homer Simpson : Oh, I'm sure of it.
Marge Simpson : But there's only one way to find out!
[the episode ends]
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Chief Wiggum : [Eddie walks into the road rage class in a bear costume] Why, it's Curtis E. Bear--the Courtesy Bear!
Eddie : [briefly dances and hums]
Chief Wiggum : For the next three hours, this bear will take your verbal and physical abuse with good nature and aplomb. So, if you'll all just grab one of these two-by-fours...
Eddie : Uh, Chief, can I at least shield my crotch?
Chief Wiggum : Bears can't talk, Eddie.
