Get Smart (TV Series)

The Impossible Mission (1968)

Don Adams: Maxwell Smart

Quotes 

• Maxwell Smart : [Max and 99, both dressed as Charlie Chaplin are trapped in a room with KAOS agents trying to break in at either side]  99, there's something I have to tell you.

  # 99 : What is it, Max?

  Maxwell Smart : Well, we've known each other for a long time and well, we've been through a lot of things together.

  # 99 : Go on, Max.

  Maxwell Smart : Well, It's just that I... well I have to tell ya how I really feel about you. I wanted to... tell ya for a long, long time but I just... well I've never been able to find the right words. You see 99, it's not easy to say... well, it's not easy to say...

  # 99 : To say I love you, Max?

  Maxwell Smart : Yes.

  # 99 : Well why don't you let me say it for you: I love you, Max.

  Maxwell Smart : No, no, 99, that's not want I want to say, I wanted to say I love you 99.

  # 99 : I know. I'm saying I love you too, Max.

  Maxwell Smart : You do?

  # 99 : I always have.

  [they kiss passionately] 

• Maxwell Smart : You know, 99? If we could get out of this trap I'd marry you.

  # 99 : [cheering up]  You would?

  Maxwell Smart : Of course I would.

  # 99 : Now that you mention it, Max, there is a way out.

  Maxwell Smart : [suddenly skeptical]  There is?

  # 99 : What about the old double door deception trick? It just might work.

  Maxwell Smart : Of course. The old double door deception trick, it just might work!

• Agent 99 : You're not taking me on this assignment, are you, Max?

  Maxwell Smart : Eh... no, I'm not.

  Agent 99 : You can't leave me out of this one, Max! This is the most important case that's ever been given to Control, this could mean the end of the world.

  Maxwell Smart : That's exactly why I'm not letting you go on this mission. If it's going to mean the end of the world, I want to make sure that you're all right.

• Maxwell Smart : This is top security. I'll use my garter phone.

  [starts rolling up pant leg] 

  # 99 : Why are you wearing two garters?

  Maxwell Smart : How do you like that? They tapped my garter phone.

• Maxwell Smart : Of course. The old poisoned needle in the phonograph trick!

• Maxwell Smart : [dressed as a Mexican musician]  You know something, 99, I like you with a moustache.

  # 99 : [wearing a Charlie Chaplin outfit]  Thanks.

  Maxwell Smart : Don't shave it off.