Neo Ned (2005)

Jeremy Renner: Ned

Quotes 

• [to Rachael] 

  Ned : You remember you asked me to tell you a happy story?

  Rachael : [Nods] 

  Ned : This is it. Me and you. We're my happy story.

• Ned : Oh, uh, believe me, I mean, if I... I wish to god I could take that back. I mean I wish I could un-fuck her...

  Rachael : You wish you could un-fuck her? You know what, If people could un-fuck people, then there world be a world full of virgins and I wouldn't have slit my fucking wrists!

• Ned : Well shit, if I can't hate the blacks, who can I hate.

  Rachael : I'm sure you'll find somebody, Ned.

• Ned : Look, just because I'm a racist doesn't mean I'm not sensitive.

• Rachael : Just so I understand, um, you want to have a war to divide up the country, in order to keep blacks away from the whites, then sneak across the border and meet me for coffee.

  Ned : Or a movie or something...

  Orderly Johnny : Ned. Ned! You're supposed to be in Mr. Johnson's office now.

  Ned : Okay.

  Rachael : It's a date. I'll meet you on the barbed wire fence.

• Rachael : How come all your stories end up with you getting injured?

  Ned : Oh, I don't know. Makes the story better, I guess.

• Ned : 'Cause it's cool. I almost got killed. Not everybody almost gets killed. The only reason why I didn't die was 'cause I had to pee. That's pretty cool.

• [last lines] 

  Ned : I shot a child molester. I shot him dead. I'm a hero. I'm an American hero.

  Ned's Dad : That you are. Deal him in.

  Ned : Deal me in!

• Ned : I don't understand. Why would Hitler be reincarnated as a nigger woman?