Sabrina the Teenage Witch (1996–2003)

Beth Broderick: Zelda Spellman, Jezebelda

Photos 

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Quotes 

• [a spell turns Salem blonde] 

  Salem : I'm blonde! My IQ just dropped 20 points!

  Zelda : [pointing to each of the Spellman women]  Blonde, blonde, blonde.

  [points at Salem] 

  Zelda : Dead.

• Zelda : Welcome home, sunshine! How was your day?

  Sabrina : Here's a quick recap: There was boredom followed by dullness with a dash of echh!

• Zelda : What's the matter?

  Sabrina : What's the matter? I have to be a witch, I have to be a mortal, I have to be a teenager and I have to be a girl all at the same time. That's what's the matter.

  Salem : At least you still have your thumbs... and a door on your bathroom!

• Zelda : So that's your plan?

  Vesta : Please, I don't plan! I scheme!

• Salem : Let's destroy everything that's dear to him. Let's indoctrinate him into the cathedral of agony.

  Zelda : I'm gonna write him a very stern letter.

  Salem : You're a regular Mad Max aren't ya?

• Zelda : So that was a dead end, but I think if we systematically retrace your steps over the last three months...

  Hilda : [Interrupting]  Sometimes I think you actually work at being annoying.

  Zelda : No, not really.

• Zelda : I think he's too young for me. He's so excited about the turn of the century.

  Hilda : I know, really. I partied like it was 1699, 1799, 1899 - in 1999, I'm staying home.

• Zelda : [Sabrina's going on a trip]  Wear seat belts! Watch the road! Avoid ice! Don't pass on mountain roads!

  Hilda : Have fun?

  Zelda : That's implied.

• Salem : Earthquake!

  Zelda : But we're in Massachusetts.

  Sabrina : [Looks out the window]  Is that a beanstalk?

  Salem : Beanstalk!

• Zelda : He just needs to remember his childhood dreams. You know what? I am going out and get him a copy of 'What color is your parachute'

  Hilda : Oh what a sweet idea.

  [Zelda leaves] 

  Hilda : [to Sabrina]  It will never work. You'd better use magic.

• Zelda : Sabrina, you're not a rumpist, are you?

  Sabrina : A rumpist? What's a rumpist?

  Zelda : Someone who judges others by their rear ends.

  Sabrina : No. OK, not usually.

• Hilda : Ah ha! You were measuring behind my back. You were going to redecorate Sabrina's room without me!

  Zelda : I didn't think you'd mind.

  Hilda : Why not?

  Zelda : Because you're a kind and giving person... And you have no taste.

• Zelda : Okay... do you know where to call in case of an emergency?

  Salem : THE MONEY STORE?

  Zelda : Salem!

  Salem : Yes... I've got your pager number.