Uncle Buck (1989)

Jay Underwood: Bug

Photos 

Quotes 

• [Buck's beat up old car pulls up] 

  Bug : [sarcastic]  Ever hear of a tune up? Hee hee hee hee hee.

  Buck : [also sarcastic]  Ah, heh heh heh. Ever hear of a ritual killing? Ah, heh heh heh heh heh!

  Bug : I don't get it.

  Buck : [serious tone]  You gnaw on her face in public like that again and you'll be one. Ah, heh heh heh heh!

• Buck : Well, well, well, they certainly are scraping the bottom of the barrel for cheerleaders these days.

  Tia : What are you doing here?

  Buck : We were just driving by to get some ice cream. Thought you might like to join us.

  Tia : I said I would be home at 10. It's not even 9!

  Buck : Who said anything about that? I thought you might like to join us for some ice cream. Maybe your Bug here can join us. We can talk about burying the hatchet. You know what a hatchet is, don't you, Bug?

  Bug : It's an ax?

  Buck : Sort of, yeah, yeah. I got one in my car if you'd like to see it.

  Bug : [getting scared]  I'll pass.

  Buck : Fair enough. I like to carry it, you never know when you're going to need it. A situation may come up say for example, someone has been drinking, and about to drive a loved one home... then I'd like to know I have it. Not to kill, no. Just to maim. Take a little off the shoulder. Swish! The elbow. Slash! Shave a little meat off the old kneecap. Fowap! Ooooo! You got both kneecaps? I like to keep mine razor sharp. Sharp enough you can shave with it. Why I've been known to circumcise a gnat. You're not a gnat are you, Bug? Wait a minute, bug, gnat. Is there a little similarity? Whoa, I think there is! Ha ha ha. You understand what I'm talking about? I don't think you do. I'll be right back. Heh heh heh heh.

  [walks away] 

  Tia : I'm sorry.

  Bug : Look, I think you'd better split. I don't exactly want him to go berserk with an ax on me.

  Tia : He's all talk.

  [Buck pulls out a small hatchet from his car] 

  Buck : Here it is! Come over, come on, I want to show it to you. Maybe later. Okay.

• Bug : this room taken i said this rooms taken if that opens I'm going to kick somebody's ass.