Flesh Gordon Meets the Cosmic Cheerleaders (1990) Poster

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10/10
One of the best of its genre
tedu-110 September 2006
Of course the "genre" is that of movies where you personally know the Producer/Director, they ask you for your opinion of the movie, and the best that you can come up with is "The colour was good.".

I watched this movie in the company of a large proportion of the cast and crew, and even they didn't take it seriously - in fact, the viewing experience was enhanced by the company's insertion of "deleted" lines from the script (there must have been one because the actors - to use the term incredibly loosely - did talk throughout most of the movie).

By its fifth repetition, the movie's "signature line" - "Captain, there's Oxygen out here." (uttered in an incredibly bad imitation of a Scots brogue by the movie's incredibly bad imitation of Star Trek's "Scottie") had become indelibly engraved in my mind.

Of course if you want an incredibly silly movie with practically no "production values" to watch while stoned, this is probably the one for you.
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liked it
spikelovesbuffy200215 July 2002
If you are a fan of big breasts, and go to your local video store with breasts on your mind, then this is the movie for you. Howard Ziehm may be an alias for Russ Meyer as this film is filled with mammary mountains, a bar filled with adult babies which only serves varieties of milk, and various other breast scenes. The highlight is when Melissa Mounds offers her ample assets to Doc Flexi on a platter. This is a breast man's classic. i really loved it this film is funny
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8/10
Not really *the* worst movie, but definitely one of them
Lankylurkr19 April 2006
Alright, I'll be the first to admit that I didn't know what to expect from a title such as "Flesh Gordon".I knew there would be some pretty raunchy stuff in it, perhaps some slightly tasteful soft-core, but I wasn't expecting *this*.

FGMtC is one of those movies that you can tell immediately came from the '80s. Flesh himself sports a wicked mullet, and the outfits seem to be cast offs from the NY night clubs.

Why a rating of 8? Simple. This is one of those movies that is soooo bad, it has to be seen to be believed. The acting is atrocious, the settings are laughably 3rd rate, the dialog is hackneyed and spends most of the movie in the poor taste pile, and the special effects are bottom of the barrel. And those are the good points! I honestly almost wet myself laughing while watching this. If you dig movies like Plan 9 From Outer Space, but with tons of T 'n A, you'll get a kick out it.

If you've got any taste whatsoever, approach with caution.
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9/10
It's THE film to see!
hate_hellion29 January 2012
Despite its silliness, vulgar content and awkward moments, Flesh Gordon doesn't stop nor does it keep viewers waiting for something to happen. Every line of dialogue brings a smile to our faces, even if it's just a corny joke or some slapstick comedy. The performances in this film are memorable, and the actors truly have a relationship with their characters, giving it their all! I'm giving this film 9/10 because there's a lot of things that could've been amended, some being just way too over-the-top or never looked back on (especially the intro). The theme gives this film some bonus points, as the music used is catchy and demands to be on download / Official Soundtrack CD!

Worth seeing? Certainly! Worth seeing time after time? For me, yes (and not just for the... adult content)! An excellent film for the immature and those who love large.... female upper body parts (there's LOADS, I say!).
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Dancing, Chewing Gum and Sex
tedg6 March 2005
This is so audacious it deserves some attention. Sure it is juvenile and cheesy. The problem of course is it somehow conflates excrement and sex, both in the story and the manner of telling the story. That ruins it: it is no "Barbarella."

But it has a framing worthy of "Orgazmo." It starts by being a cheap movie that the characters step out of. And then seamlessly they step back into it. What starts out as an aversion to boogers turns into a society of turds, a field of farts, an attack dick, a collection of pseudoscience revolving around erectile dysfunction (though the term didn't exist then) and submission rays. No mention of gleet.

That movie within a movie thing is pretty cool, especially when what you see is stupid. It gives an excuse, after all, you are not seeing the real movie, but the cheesy movie within. Worked great for an even cheesier production: "Robot Monster."

Ted's Evaluation -- 2 of 3: Has some interesting elements.
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One of the worst
david-34520 August 2001
The original Flesh Gordon was a silly, campy take off on Flash Gordon and his serial compatriots. Flesh 1 was sophomoric to be sure, but the humour did work and the film is very entertaining. Not so the long delayed sequel that I recently purchased on DVD. As soon as I find a store that buys used DVDs, I will unload this piece of garbage. The director claimed that "political correctness" is what held the film's release up. After veiwing it I feel that it was shelved for so long due to the fact that it stinks, big time! The comedy in Flesh 2 is in such bad taste that it is not funny at all, it's just gross and offensive. It's all down hill after a promising "film within a film" opening, which itself is ruined by the antics of "King Dong" (bet the screen writers spent hours coming upon with that one). Speaking of bad comedy, I have to mention the Turd people, yes, Turd people. I feel really sorry for the folks playing these characters. I doubt that they put this film on their resumes. Mr. Hanky it's not. And couldn't they have cast better looking women in the parts of the Cosmic Cheerleaders? The ladies on view in these roles are dogs! And one is supposed to be an ex Playmate. I guess Heffner is going blind in his old age. At least the girl playing Dale is attractive as are the ladies in the opening sequence. The new guy playing Flesh was obviously chosen for his body rather than acting skills, which are nill. Another major problem is that the film has no sense of pace whatsoever. Even thought it's fairly short at 100 minutes or so, the film really drags and after awhile you wonder if it will ever end. This is what they made fast forward for.

The only nice touch is the return of the guy who played Wang the Perverted in the first film. And that's it. Please do not waste your time or money on this peice of dreck. It simply is one of the worst.
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Makes the first one look like STAR WARS
LJ2723 August 1999
Because I liked the special effects and stop-motion animation from the first film, I decided to check out the sequel. It contains stop-motion animation and special effects too but they pale beside the work done in the original. Several of the people who worked on the original were later Academy Award winners (such as Rick Baker and Dennis Muren) but the effects in this one are not as good and are few and far between. As far as porno films go, this one has less nudity in it than the original had. It's mostly crude toilet humor and bad acting. Dialogue scenes go one forever and the sound mix is so bad you can't understand what anyone is saying most of the time but since nothing said pertains to the plot (if there is one) then it doesn't matter. It starts out trying to create a 1930s atmosphere which is good but after that, it's a bunch of half naked people standing around talking. The first film is faster paced and better made and looks like STAR WARS compared to this.
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5/10
Much Better than I expected
Space_Mafune12 February 2003
Yes this is tasteless, crude and vulgar...but then what else should one expect from a sex-comedy sci-fi spoof. While this is also rather silly and stupid, I have to say though that this film is nonetheless very well made with some very cool and fun stop-motion fx and some neat little jokes at Star Wars expense...certainly it's much better(and funnier) than many of the sex comedy farces that get released nowadays.
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2/10
Well this movie certainly has s**t for brains!
gridoon29 June 2003
Possessing a sense of humor that can be generously described as "infantile", performances so frantic they may give you a headache, and special effects that are mostly obvious miniatures, this abomination plumbs the depths of tastelessness and stupidity like few films you'll ever see. So it has a certain curiosity value. But neither that, nor the large amount of T&A, are justifiable excuses for any rating higher than....0.5 out of 4 stars.
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10/10
Breast Worship at its Best In This Sequel to Flesh Gordon
spidey-610 August 1998
If you are a fan of big breasts, and go to your local video store with breasts on your mind, then this is the movie for you. Howard Ziehm may be an alias for Russ Meyer as this film is filled with mammary mountains, a bar filled with adult babies which only serves varieties of milk, and various other breast scenes. The highlight is when Melissa Mounds offers her ample assets to Doc Flexi on a platter. This is a breast man's classic.
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10/10
Not for prudes but for those with a sense of humour
bigeddie6929 July 2002
Inspired genius, the film is almost as funny as watching those who can't take it, walk out of the cinema in disgust. One for a midnight showing after four or five beers and you must see it with a girl on a first date, she'll love it.

When will we get a third?
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1/10
Not only one of the worst movies ever made, but one of the worst SEQUELS.
Mephisto-2425 July 2000
Have you noticed how many sequels are in any list of worst movies, or in video clearance sales? Well, this is one of those films that gives sequels a bad name. Unlike the original, which featured some interesting eye candy among hilarious jokes, this fails miserably both as comedy and porn, being unsexy (not to mention tacky) and unfunny. The kindest thing I can say about this film is that it's ultimately forgettable.
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4/10
In that case. Make it Swiss
Michael Ledo24 September 2017
Warning: Spoilers
The original is a cult classic. I am old enough to have seen it shown at a drive-in. This is a sequel written and directed by the same person who did the first one. In this film kickbox champion Vince Murdocco plays the title role, kidnapped by Cosmic Cheerleaders for his male rigidity.

Like the first feature, this film features names the Amazon checker won't allow. They encounter sexual type creatures as in the original. And of course the film has a mountain of nudity, some sex and swearing. Had the first film never been made, this would have gained some appeal in the cult world. But it doesn't measure up to the original as Howard Ziehm makes the same film over and not as good.

Features Morgan Fox, Miss World Canada and Playmate of the Month in the December, 1990. Strawberry Angel, Melissa Mounds, Robyn Kelly, plus many others
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3/10
Little Plot and Disgusting as South Park
Baldach10 June 2002
If you wonder where the creators of South Park get their toilet humor here is a good place to look. Flesh Gordon is sexually perverted satire of Flash Gordon. Flesh Gordon will bascially have sex with anything that is a female adult (notice I did not mention human). I thought some of the scences where Flesh and the Professor were chasing the kidnappers of the cheerleaders were funny. However parts were Flesh goes into the bowels of a planet and find giant talking feces was just plan disgusting for me. If you can take satire or crude humor do not watch this movie other wise you have been warned.
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Easily the worst film in the whole universe!
DJ Inferno12 May 2002
Warning: Spoilers
*****Spoiler!*****

First I wanted to comment this film with only one word: BULLSH!T... but then I decided to write a warning for all those who haven´t seen it yet to avoid it at all cost! I loved Howard Ziehm´s great original from 1972, which is an undisputed classic of sleazy cinema in my eyes, but this nasty sequel is only extremely boring, extremely stupid and extremely disgusting! Some scenes are really alright like the take in the G-Spot Café, however too many stuff in this film makes you ask yourself with you´re wasting your precious time on such a load of rubbish! The anti-climax is when a nutty professor and a dumb chick flight with their spaceship through a field of farting (!!!) meteors or title hero Flesh Gordon gets attacked by feces-monsters... Can it be worser?!? Tough task I think! Costumes (What costumes?!?) and special F/X are so miserable that every Troma-production looks like a Jerry Bruckheimer-film in comparison! If you want to see Melissa Mound´s boobs buy a Hot Score magazine instead! "Flesh Gordon 2" is a cheek!!!
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3/10
16 years later
kosmasp27 June 2013
A sequel that no one wanted as it seems. And that can be very, very annoying. But I can see that some might like the completely OTT approach to the movie. There are so many sexual sight gags in it, that you'll either shake your head in disbelieve or won't be able to stop laughing. If a movie like ... "Movie 43" can produce laughs (arguably with better actors, at least name wise), than why should this be treated differently/worse? So it changed the lead actor from part 1, but the time difference between movies made this inevitable.

To call this silly would be an understatement. The acting, if you can call it that, is bad at best, the hair and make-up feels like it's from another dimension (which almost makes it work). But there are still fans for that sort of thing out there. And while this wasn't planned as porn, it does have some nudity in it as well.
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2/10
Contains one brilliantly funny scene!
sascha-26 July 2011
This movie is absolutely stupid, but it contains one of the funniest scene I've seen in years: Master Bator has created a being that looks like an octopus, and while this being is trying to lick the legs of Dale Ardor, Evil Presence beholds the creature (which he hadn't seen before) and exclaims: "What is that disgusting green slime doing? Gross!"

He lifts the creature and throws it into a hole in the ground like a basketball. Master Bator is shocked by that and Evil Presence says: "Two points!" This scene nearly killed me. Unfortunately, the rest of the movie is crap: 2 / 10.
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4/10
Rotten Sequal
filmbuff197024 May 2002
I saw the movie at a Midnight Show.what a mistake that was.this is so unfunny.This movie was made about 15 years too late.The movie is cheap tacky but so badly done.it has nothing to redeem it.comedys are rarely this boring.1 out of 10
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