I wanted to watch 'Alice, Sweet Alice' tonight but was unable to locate my copy. Did I give it away? We'll watch whatever this short movie is.
Did I really buy this DVD? For heaven's sake, why?
It kicks off in a primitive time where some pilgrims are lynching a British hag who speaks her final words and rambles on about Ponda Baba for some reason. How'd Walrus Man become known as Ponda Baba today? We never referred to him as that back in the 1970s. Is it politically incorrect to say Walrus Man today? Does that offend certain people with neurofibromatosis or Proteus syndrome? They wouldn't want to watch the original 'Total Recall' then. Movie's full of mutants and Zoidberg's. Oh wait, I'm thinking of Anthony Hopkin's Elephant Man, not Walrus Man.
What looks like Pieter Vorstedt from 'Lethal Weapon 2' is the commanding officer in charge of hanging the hag, and he has a bobble head and Toby Mcguire's mouth and eyes.
The British hag is still running her mouth off. Just hang her already. Do you have any final words - not your entire autobiography.
The title of the movie appears, and the lady singing mentions Hammerhead in the lyrics twice. What's with all the 'New Hope' references?
What looks like the son of Spock buys a whole library of occult bibles from the Yorkshire Ripper and invites him to a sleepover at a coven gathering.
Boiling under the surface, you just know that at any minute now, one of the Patridge family members will pop up.
"I like my chicks dumb, baby, but you're really something else," says the dork with spittle drooling off his bottom lip. That's his pickup line for a total stranger.
How'd this crap time travel from the 16th century to the 60s? To think that only a decade earlier, Ed Gein was digging for treasures.
A bunch of 60s academics lower their standards and dabble in a silly seance, which is usually reserved for impressionable teenagers.
The British slag who was hung at the start is summoned and enters Jill, who uses an ancient foul text I've never heard before - you impotent lackwit. Lackwit? Is that even a word? A lackwit is a witless person or fool. I never heard of it.
The movie becomes about possession where a 16th-century hanging victim enters the body of little goody two shoes, Jill. She has 'V'-like powers and kills budgerigars but doesn't bite their heads off like the lizard people in 'V.' This Spock kid thinks he's Michael Nesmith from The Monkees. He's got his hair.
What am I watching: 'Halloween 5-Ply?' They sport a silly wrist tattoo of seahorses to communicate with the dead souls of yesterday.
Why am I watching this crap at Christmas time for? All I ever watch is garbage every night. And I own this DVD?
The movie's one big drama theatrical display with no action.
It descends into a farce when the dead witch roll calls dead students from a bygone era and names off every one of them twice in two scenes! Get a load of this hogwash. Before killing a kid, she prepares the soil and a tree trunk with a spell ritual and calls to the following: Harky, Gag-On, Bellsickle, and Curry Jack. They're supposed to appear and walk the earth again, apparently. They all sound like 1950s gang names. They're definitely not Star Wars characters, that's for sure. Not finished with her summonings, she further calls on A Snow Disc, Al Connect, Ark Fat Sac, and Alli Donut-San, Ali Mills karate sister, right?
The dead-possessed actress starts drugging unsuspecting cult members and making them sign up for a 12-month subscription to Satan Weekly or something.
It's hard to believe that there are some people in life who take all this crap seriously, which is sad as they give the occult a sinister edge considering that it's a portal to the astral world, which is beautiful in itself and not about murder, spells, or revenge portrayed here in this movie. The occult isn't as sinister as most will have you believe.
The dead witch starts plying reluctant members with truth serum and turning them into compliant dead zombies. Or, plain dead corpses, take your pick.
At the one hour and 7-minute mark, Mr. Miyagi's rare Devil's Cauldron bonsai appears in the background in another boring talkfest scene between the son of Spock, Michael Nesmith, and Pieter Vorstedt from 'Lethal Weapon 2.' The son of Spock, Nesmith, reminds me a bit of a young Anthony Perkins at times.
Around the one-hour, 10-minute mark, is that not Jeffrey Dahmer on the right there?
There she goes again, speaking in an ancient tongue, calling to whom exactly? Let me see if I can translate all these batches of non-Star Wars names. Ma'Hordan of the turkey horror order, Dead Arm: the prince who has a long, hard dappyhendrid. Hey, she said it, not me! It sounds like a plant or a cousin to Tippi Hedren. Belta Gord, Calda-something? Clowdadeath? Ass Mole'ias!?! Now we're getting into 'Beavis and Butthead' territory.
She's still going with her list, and I'm really struggling here.
Are Fack Sac, Kall Kannex, and Aladoins (Must be Creed's forgotten brother?) Levithan, Bell Bareath (one shade away from bad breath.) Ansatith (one shade away from antibacterial mouthwash.) Are you quite done, lady?
At the one hour and 14-minute mark, an Atari 2600 big boss in the form of a cross confronts the dead witch and polarizes her into relinquishing the possessed dead girl, Jill.
Um, not making any sense, what's his name from 'Lethal Weapon 2' hits first base with the dead witch, is transported back to the 16th century, and finds himself in the comfort of a noose, and the movie ends with no credits.
Why me?
Did I really buy this DVD? For heaven's sake, why?
It kicks off in a primitive time where some pilgrims are lynching a British hag who speaks her final words and rambles on about Ponda Baba for some reason. How'd Walrus Man become known as Ponda Baba today? We never referred to him as that back in the 1970s. Is it politically incorrect to say Walrus Man today? Does that offend certain people with neurofibromatosis or Proteus syndrome? They wouldn't want to watch the original 'Total Recall' then. Movie's full of mutants and Zoidberg's. Oh wait, I'm thinking of Anthony Hopkin's Elephant Man, not Walrus Man.
What looks like Pieter Vorstedt from 'Lethal Weapon 2' is the commanding officer in charge of hanging the hag, and he has a bobble head and Toby Mcguire's mouth and eyes.
The British hag is still running her mouth off. Just hang her already. Do you have any final words - not your entire autobiography.
The title of the movie appears, and the lady singing mentions Hammerhead in the lyrics twice. What's with all the 'New Hope' references?
What looks like the son of Spock buys a whole library of occult bibles from the Yorkshire Ripper and invites him to a sleepover at a coven gathering.
Boiling under the surface, you just know that at any minute now, one of the Patridge family members will pop up.
"I like my chicks dumb, baby, but you're really something else," says the dork with spittle drooling off his bottom lip. That's his pickup line for a total stranger.
How'd this crap time travel from the 16th century to the 60s? To think that only a decade earlier, Ed Gein was digging for treasures.
A bunch of 60s academics lower their standards and dabble in a silly seance, which is usually reserved for impressionable teenagers.
The British slag who was hung at the start is summoned and enters Jill, who uses an ancient foul text I've never heard before - you impotent lackwit. Lackwit? Is that even a word? A lackwit is a witless person or fool. I never heard of it.
The movie becomes about possession where a 16th-century hanging victim enters the body of little goody two shoes, Jill. She has 'V'-like powers and kills budgerigars but doesn't bite their heads off like the lizard people in 'V.' This Spock kid thinks he's Michael Nesmith from The Monkees. He's got his hair.
What am I watching: 'Halloween 5-Ply?' They sport a silly wrist tattoo of seahorses to communicate with the dead souls of yesterday.
Why am I watching this crap at Christmas time for? All I ever watch is garbage every night. And I own this DVD?
The movie's one big drama theatrical display with no action.
It descends into a farce when the dead witch roll calls dead students from a bygone era and names off every one of them twice in two scenes! Get a load of this hogwash. Before killing a kid, she prepares the soil and a tree trunk with a spell ritual and calls to the following: Harky, Gag-On, Bellsickle, and Curry Jack. They're supposed to appear and walk the earth again, apparently. They all sound like 1950s gang names. They're definitely not Star Wars characters, that's for sure. Not finished with her summonings, she further calls on A Snow Disc, Al Connect, Ark Fat Sac, and Alli Donut-San, Ali Mills karate sister, right?
The dead-possessed actress starts drugging unsuspecting cult members and making them sign up for a 12-month subscription to Satan Weekly or something.
It's hard to believe that there are some people in life who take all this crap seriously, which is sad as they give the occult a sinister edge considering that it's a portal to the astral world, which is beautiful in itself and not about murder, spells, or revenge portrayed here in this movie. The occult isn't as sinister as most will have you believe.
The dead witch starts plying reluctant members with truth serum and turning them into compliant dead zombies. Or, plain dead corpses, take your pick.
At the one hour and 7-minute mark, Mr. Miyagi's rare Devil's Cauldron bonsai appears in the background in another boring talkfest scene between the son of Spock, Michael Nesmith, and Pieter Vorstedt from 'Lethal Weapon 2.' The son of Spock, Nesmith, reminds me a bit of a young Anthony Perkins at times.
Around the one-hour, 10-minute mark, is that not Jeffrey Dahmer on the right there?
There she goes again, speaking in an ancient tongue, calling to whom exactly? Let me see if I can translate all these batches of non-Star Wars names. Ma'Hordan of the turkey horror order, Dead Arm: the prince who has a long, hard dappyhendrid. Hey, she said it, not me! It sounds like a plant or a cousin to Tippi Hedren. Belta Gord, Calda-something? Clowdadeath? Ass Mole'ias!?! Now we're getting into 'Beavis and Butthead' territory.
She's still going with her list, and I'm really struggling here.
Are Fack Sac, Kall Kannex, and Aladoins (Must be Creed's forgotten brother?) Levithan, Bell Bareath (one shade away from bad breath.) Ansatith (one shade away from antibacterial mouthwash.) Are you quite done, lady?
At the one hour and 14-minute mark, an Atari 2600 big boss in the form of a cross confronts the dead witch and polarizes her into relinquishing the possessed dead girl, Jill.
Um, not making any sense, what's his name from 'Lethal Weapon 2' hits first base with the dead witch, is transported back to the 16th century, and finds himself in the comfort of a noose, and the movie ends with no credits.
Why me?