Jango on Tour (2011)
1/10
That thing, It haunts me.
24 March 2020
I haven't been able to forget his face ever since I saw this movie 3 years ago, and by it I mean that GODDAMN RAT! I had diagnosed ptsd for 3 years but that was NOTHING compared to the violent pain that goddamn fox thing has caused me. I see him everywhere, in my nightmares, in everyday events, I was Watching ratatouille a while back and just seeing a rat triggered a flashback to that thing.

I haven't had a peaceful night of sleep ever since this abomination cursed my life. I haven't felt a moment of peace for 3 YEARS! I just want to forget, I just don't want to see him whenever I'm alone at night, whenever I see any animal that looks like it smells.

I made the mistake of going to an anime convention a while back and I saw a furry and it gave me a full on panic attack, all I saw was that indescribably wicked thing walking towards me, all wet and saggy looking and I don't think you've ever seen a grown man cry as much as I did in that moment.

I was watching guardians of the galaxy one time and that goddamn raccoon, I remember when I used to like that raccoon, but that time I did not see our well beloved trash panda all I saw was, Jango, the abomination.

DO NOT WATCH THIS MOVIE! I cannot tell you enough times what a stupid mistake I made the day I decided to sit through this pile of utter garbage but ive lived to regret it SO MUCH. Do not repeat my mistakes. Do not watch this. You will never be yourself again, you'll be an empty shell haunted by the things you've seen. If I could compare this movie to anything I'd compare it to being forced to listen to that unholy song "Dance Monkey" by Tones and I on repeat for 5 years straight whilst being given a sponge bath by Donald trump and Begbie the utter ar$e from trainspotting.

Anyways, This has been my goodbye letter but do not feel bad for me, when I'm gone I'll feel peace for the first time in three years. I've already driven my family away with all the late night screams and aggressive panic attacks, I haven't spoken to my children in years because my wife considers me a danger to myself and people in my surroundings. All I'm going to do before I leave this world is pray that, that thing doesn't go to the same place as me if that be heaven or hell does not matter to me, I'll take anything as long as I don't have to see it's sagging face one more time.
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