2/10
River of Death (1989)
5 September 2019
Directed by Steve Carver. Starring Michael Dudikoff, Donald Pleasence, L.Q. Jones, Herbert Lom, Cynthia Erland, Robert Vaughn, Sarah Maur Thorp, Alain D. Woolf, Foziah Davidson, Gordon Mulholland, Rufus Swart, Victor Melleny. (R)

Leaden-paced jungle "adventure" with Dudikoff leading a small group into the Amazon (all with their own separate, murky reasons for going), fighting off natives, river pirates and boredom, to get to a lost city where a Nazi mad scientist is doing...stuff. "Apocalypse Now," it ain't. Unnecessarily convoluted plot is no compensation for the perfunctory, poorly-staged action scenes. Hard to say what's more listless: Dudikoff's performance or Dudikoff's inner thought narration; meanwhile, it's always sad to see once respectable actors like Robert Vaughn and Donald Pleasence cash a check and sleepwalk through a crummy movie. Based on a novel by Alistair MacLean, but this is light years from the likes of "Where Eagles Dare" and "The Guns of Navarone."

21/100
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