1/10
If you can spell 'Penitentiary' without looking.. this film probably isn't for you
9 May 2009
Wow. Just wow. What we have here, ladies and gentlemen is a true piece of subversive cinema. It may look like a film, it may smell like a film, but what it is, in essence, is a soft-core porno.

Forget the nonsense on the back of the box about the plot. Alright I'll brief you on it: a woman infiltrates a prison disguised as an inmate to find the only witness to her sister's murder. Yadda yadda yadda. Pure window dressing.

You can skip all the badly dubbed English and the terrible music.. just stick it on mute, close the curtains and hit fast forward to the nudie bits. And believe me, you'll never have long to wait between scenes. There's lesbianism, sado-masochism, intimately detailed showers.. and if you're really boring just straight-out sex.

It's just a shame so many of the women are ugly, but hey.. I guess the director couldn't afford Playboy's finest on his budget of 2p, a button and half a pack of Spearmint Polos, so that's okay. Just try to imagine them with the head of Angelina Jolie.

Oops, I've probably spent too long talking.. you probably want to get started!! I'll leave you to it, and get back to reviewing the real films!! Have fun!! 0/10
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