Australian cinema has gone through many phases - more downs than ups. Out of nowhere emerged this absolute gem of a film. The popularity and critical acclaim encouraged the director to follow up with Jindabyne - another gem, but probably just didn't hit the heights of this one.
As with Jindabyne, this film is high metaphorical and to some degree, open to interpretation. But much like Woody Allen, there is a reluctance to dumb it down; instead allowing the audience to discover the so-called "underlying" themes and messages of the film upon reflection. Really good study for high school English students in my view.
Unfortunately, in the pursuit of not dumbing it down, many people don't get it or don't get it entirely. For this reason, I just thought i'd throw you a couple of insights (spoilers below):
DANCING - METAPHOR At the start, they are learning to dance. Now dancing symbolises unity of a man and woman in harmonious coordination (marriage). The fact that they are "learning" to dance at the start of the film indicates that they need guidance or further development. They are unable to dance together, indicating problems with marriages is a theme of this film. Perhaps love got it started, but isn't sustaining it. Shortly after, he starts his affair with another dancing class member.
LACK OF COMMUNICATION - THEME This was the major point of the film. Relationships do not survive where communication is lacking. When he returns home with blood on his shirt (following the accident during his morning jog) his wife attempts to help and comfort, but he doesn't say what happens and sternly brushes her off. She never tells him that she was going to allow their son to smoke pot at home.
Obviously the fact that he is having an affair plays a role in their problems, but as she revealed to the psychologist 'it's not that he's (having an affair), it's that he won't tell if he was.' Ironically, it would appear that honesty and open communication will forgive his infidelity, but non-disclosure is crossing the "relationship-ending" line.
Rush and his wife similarly have communication problems. His failure to answer the phone and simply listen to her pleas on the answering machine shows that communication between them is broken - as is the fact that he cannot look at her face while he makes love to her. Yet, her failure to completely confront Rush with here suspicions (that he's having a gay affair with one of her patients) is equally paralysing to their relationship.
Interestingly, the gay patient plays two extremely important roles. First, he indicates that his married lover tells him things about his marriage that he would never tell his wife. Again, communication breakdown. Second, when he speaks about the comments made by his lover about his lover's wife, the psychologist interprets them to be comments made by her husband about her, even though we later learn that she was mistaken. Though while she was mistaken in fact (ie.. Rush was not that patient's lover), it hardly matters as we come to realise that this is the sort of honesty that Rush does not provide to his wife. In fact, when she mentions that she's having difficulty with this patient in the restaurant, his solution is "refer him one." This probably reflects the dealing of problems in their marriage: if it's difficult of complicated, get rid of it, disregard it, palm it off to someone else, don't confront it or solve it yourself.... just "refer him on."
Then there is the issue of their daughter's tragic death. This has invariably distorted the marriage to the point where it is simply "held together by grief." But again - communication becomes an issue. She felt that she had to communicate her grief to the world (she wrote a book) while he was very much against it and didn't tell his wife that he frequently visited the site of their daughter's death. The communication mismatch is astounding and is why their relationship is in crisis mode.
Interestingly, all this is contrasted with couple who live next door to the cop's mistress. HE's unemployed, she works long shifts, they have several children and are financially battling. All the hallmarks are there for a strained marriage. But surprisingly, this is the strongest marriage in the film. They are a loving happy couple for one reason: they communicate openly. He told his wife that the neighbour invited him in for coffee after she left for work. Full disclosure keeps this marriage happy, no matter what external pressures are at play. In a way, the director is basically saying that while most people think that financial difficulties, work pressures, unemployment and so on bring down marriages, that isn't the case. Their communication keeps it alive and this is contrasted with the cop, who has a stable home-life, but their marriage is suffering due to their failure to communicate openly with each other.
THE POINT The film leaves us with conflicting feelings. Rush lost his wife, the cop's mistress has not repaired her marriage with her ex, but the cop's marriage appears to survive.
The fact that the cop confessed to his infidelity may have thrown his marriage off the rails temporarily, but it forced him to open up to his wife and for his wife to openly communicate with him... and at the end, it appears that they are dancing in perfect harmony - communication and disclosure of his affair actually saved their marriage.
However, Rush's stirring words are just as revealing: sometimes love isn't enough. This is very true when relationships encounter difficulties and obscure patches. Love will get it started and keep it going for a while, but communication breakdowns will eventually overcome the love that holds marriages together. This was what the director was trying to say in my view.
As with Jindabyne, this film is high metaphorical and to some degree, open to interpretation. But much like Woody Allen, there is a reluctance to dumb it down; instead allowing the audience to discover the so-called "underlying" themes and messages of the film upon reflection. Really good study for high school English students in my view.
Unfortunately, in the pursuit of not dumbing it down, many people don't get it or don't get it entirely. For this reason, I just thought i'd throw you a couple of insights (spoilers below):
DANCING - METAPHOR At the start, they are learning to dance. Now dancing symbolises unity of a man and woman in harmonious coordination (marriage). The fact that they are "learning" to dance at the start of the film indicates that they need guidance or further development. They are unable to dance together, indicating problems with marriages is a theme of this film. Perhaps love got it started, but isn't sustaining it. Shortly after, he starts his affair with another dancing class member.
LACK OF COMMUNICATION - THEME This was the major point of the film. Relationships do not survive where communication is lacking. When he returns home with blood on his shirt (following the accident during his morning jog) his wife attempts to help and comfort, but he doesn't say what happens and sternly brushes her off. She never tells him that she was going to allow their son to smoke pot at home.
Obviously the fact that he is having an affair plays a role in their problems, but as she revealed to the psychologist 'it's not that he's (having an affair), it's that he won't tell if he was.' Ironically, it would appear that honesty and open communication will forgive his infidelity, but non-disclosure is crossing the "relationship-ending" line.
Rush and his wife similarly have communication problems. His failure to answer the phone and simply listen to her pleas on the answering machine shows that communication between them is broken - as is the fact that he cannot look at her face while he makes love to her. Yet, her failure to completely confront Rush with here suspicions (that he's having a gay affair with one of her patients) is equally paralysing to their relationship.
Interestingly, the gay patient plays two extremely important roles. First, he indicates that his married lover tells him things about his marriage that he would never tell his wife. Again, communication breakdown. Second, when he speaks about the comments made by his lover about his lover's wife, the psychologist interprets them to be comments made by her husband about her, even though we later learn that she was mistaken. Though while she was mistaken in fact (ie.. Rush was not that patient's lover), it hardly matters as we come to realise that this is the sort of honesty that Rush does not provide to his wife. In fact, when she mentions that she's having difficulty with this patient in the restaurant, his solution is "refer him one." This probably reflects the dealing of problems in their marriage: if it's difficult of complicated, get rid of it, disregard it, palm it off to someone else, don't confront it or solve it yourself.... just "refer him on."
Then there is the issue of their daughter's tragic death. This has invariably distorted the marriage to the point where it is simply "held together by grief." But again - communication becomes an issue. She felt that she had to communicate her grief to the world (she wrote a book) while he was very much against it and didn't tell his wife that he frequently visited the site of their daughter's death. The communication mismatch is astounding and is why their relationship is in crisis mode.
Interestingly, all this is contrasted with couple who live next door to the cop's mistress. HE's unemployed, she works long shifts, they have several children and are financially battling. All the hallmarks are there for a strained marriage. But surprisingly, this is the strongest marriage in the film. They are a loving happy couple for one reason: they communicate openly. He told his wife that the neighbour invited him in for coffee after she left for work. Full disclosure keeps this marriage happy, no matter what external pressures are at play. In a way, the director is basically saying that while most people think that financial difficulties, work pressures, unemployment and so on bring down marriages, that isn't the case. Their communication keeps it alive and this is contrasted with the cop, who has a stable home-life, but their marriage is suffering due to their failure to communicate openly with each other.
THE POINT The film leaves us with conflicting feelings. Rush lost his wife, the cop's mistress has not repaired her marriage with her ex, but the cop's marriage appears to survive.
The fact that the cop confessed to his infidelity may have thrown his marriage off the rails temporarily, but it forced him to open up to his wife and for his wife to openly communicate with him... and at the end, it appears that they are dancing in perfect harmony - communication and disclosure of his affair actually saved their marriage.
However, Rush's stirring words are just as revealing: sometimes love isn't enough. This is very true when relationships encounter difficulties and obscure patches. Love will get it started and keep it going for a while, but communication breakdowns will eventually overcome the love that holds marriages together. This was what the director was trying to say in my view.