Takeshi's Castle (2002–2004)
The funniest thing on TV EVER!
30 January 2004
This has simply got to be, the funniest program ever created! Why it isn't on more-often, or out on DVD (to my knowledge) is crazy...it's simply a must-see program!

Well, whats to say of the program, basically, the idea behind the show is a kind of, Japanese "It's a Knockout" with 100 Mad contestants competing in a serious of dangerous and equally mad games. Those who fail in a game are knocked out, those who don't go through! - Simple!.....well actually, No, not quite. Unfortunatly for the contestants, but not for us, the Games are devilishly hard and involve pain, LOTS of pain. Take for example, Knock-Knock. In this, the contestants have to work their way through five sets of doors, easy! Wrong! in each set there is five doors, two are made of paper, three are made of wood...the object being to avoid the wooden ones, and as you can guess, not all of our "Happy-Clappy-Jappy-Chappies" make it. For some strange reason, watching a flying Japanese Kung-Fu monkey, fling himself head-first into a large wooden door, and bounce off like a flea in a bouncey castle, defines the word "Comedy". This is utterly hilarious, i can't think of anything that rivals this show in Laughs per Half-Hour. And, of course, if your watching the UK version, not only do you get to see Japanese people hurl themselves at Doors in Knock-Knock, break shins and legs in Skipping Stones, Get runover by large boulders in Avalanche, Get hit by large-pumped up volley balls in Bridge Ball...but you also get Craig Charles' (of Red Dwarf fame)commentary. This is too, hilarious, admittedlly he takes some of his lines from either Red Dwarf itself (Badly-Parked Volkswagens anyone?) or from his book "The Log" (Save the whales gig) but even those, though heard before, are still damn funny to hear again. His commentary, though sometimes using only simple comments, hardly ever fails to get a laugh, particulary after watching one hapless contestant impale his Family Jewels on a large concrete rock, comments like "No more family planning for that guy" or "He's smiling, but his spud's are killing him" are sheer comedy gold. Of course though, it's the games we watch it for, and yes, there are some slightly less-funny games (still hilarious though!) such as Karaoke, or Quake. But, it's when you get the chance to see a "Highly-Trained" Emerald Guard, get wasted by one of his own teams Boulders in Avalanche, and continue to plummet, with said boulder down a long and crudely built set, that you appriciate the funny things in life.

In short, the Games are superb, the commentary is amazingly well-timed if not accurate (one example being Craig's "He's won, He's won, He's....a she" Comments, which appear rather alarmingly, quite often).

This programme is a classic, i can guarentee, you will not see many programmes that can supply you with more laughs. Utterly compelling viewing.

Those of you who have Challenge TV at home, go at watch this every time it's on, it's a definate must see, it really is such a good programme, and i swear, you will laugh harder than you've ever done before! Superb!

And, as Mr Charles likes to say at the end...

"AS my old Dad used to say, You can't cook minute rice in a minute. The Rice is fast, the Microwave's fast, you've got a split second...you never can make it" - Answer's on a postcard please.
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