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danielbeaman
Reviews
Hubie Halloween (2020)
Regurgitated characters/jokes/etc
Adam Sandler was great in the 90s! In the 90s, and not now. If I want to see a goofy talking Sandler character, I'll rewatch the Waterboro. Peepee sheets indeed.
Captain Marvel (2019)
Biggest disappointment of the MCU so far...
I've really enjoyed the MCU, with small blips, here and there.
Captain Marvel is not a blip.
It's a bomb.
The acting was barely passable, the special effects makeup for the Skrulls was laughable for such a high budget movie, and the constant reminder that it was taking place during the 1990s with all the popular music from back then. The music angle worked in Guardians of the Galaxy; it was Quill's shtick. This was just shameless copying.
This movie was a chore to get through, and I found nothing likable about it, aside from Samual L. Jackson's interaction with the cat.
Ghostbusters (2016)
This movie made me change my mind...
I was very anti Hollywood reboots/remakes. I refused to watch this movie because I was such a fan of the originals.
I recieved a free online version of the movie and finally watched it.
And it's great!
The story is well written, and I even say it's better than the original story.
All the main actresses work perfectly together, and ALL of the Ghostbusters actually have a reason to be a Ghostbuster, unlike Ernie Hudson's character (who I still love, but really lifts out no problem).
All around great movie!
3 from Hell (2019)
Why was this even made?
I loved House of 1000 Corpses.
Then Devils Rejects came out, and I loved that even more.
I heard about 3 From Hell and I was excited.
There was no reason to be excited.
From an early (offscreen) death of Captain Spaulding (because of Sid Haigs deteriorating condition at the time, RIP), to the introduction of a new, and annoying character, this movie made no sense. It went nowhere.
The only reason I gave it 3 starts was because Baby wasn't as nearly as annoying as she has been in the previous films.
This played out like a direct to late night cable movie, which it probably should have been.
Chairman of the Board (1997)
Stupid and ridiculous! I love it!
If you're searching for a cerebral film, this isn't it. But if you were expecting something smart, well, you're obviously pretty stupid.
This movie is stupid, but that's what it is supposed to be! And it does it well!
Carrot Top is at the top of his game!
I would rather watch this then most of the movies that come out these days. In fact, I watch it at least once a month, much to my wife's displeasure!
CBGB (2013)
Almost Great
This movie was almost perfect. There were plenty of great actors, including the super talented Alan Rickman. There was tons of great music.
Where the movie loses it is with the whole addition of Punk magazine.
The movie is called CBGB, not "Punk" or "Punk Magazine". It's not even about punks at all, but the beginning of a club that helped introduce the world to new and original music.
"Punk" had absolutely nothing to do with it, and should have been left out.
This movie would get 10 stars if Punk hadn't been a part of it.
Thong Girl 2: The Return of the Thong (2004)
Is this actually a real thing?
I happened to catch this movie on one of the free streaming apps. I wish I hadn't.
Here's a spoiler: Thong Girl farts some kind of laser that makes the bad guys disappear.
The version I saw had the director's commentary track going as well. I'm not sure why.
If you like very low budget, very low quality movies (not a "film" like the director mentions a couple of times), then I guess you might enjoy it. Get super drunk or super stoned. It may help.
31 (2016)
Don't Waste Your Time
I generally enjoy Rob Zombie flicks, but "31" was a chore to get through.
The villains are supposed to be scary (I think) but they just come across as boring and idiotic.
There's absolutely nothing interesting about the "heros", for lack of a better word.
Basically what we have here is what seems to be another Rob Zombie movie for his wife to "act" in (and yes, it's in quotations because Sheri Moon Zomboe is a terrible actress), a bunch of his regular actors and friends to maybe make a little money, and an excuse to make a bloody, gory, horror fest (but it just doesn't deliver).