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bmartin639
Reviews
Immaculate (2024)
Why did anyone hire this main actress
Wow just wow I guess it's entire movie is about the main actors face since that's all the camera seems to be on we get it you got that famous actor in your movie but now you have to make a movie whoever told this person that she looks like she should play a nun lied to her. Does she even know what a nun is or she just read about them in a book somewhere The rest of the movie is everyone just making a stern face I'm pretty sure all these movies are just ways for famous people to get paid cuz there's no way anybody could call this movie art or even justify why they made it I need a lot of characters to fill out this review.
Return to Return to Nuke 'Em High Aka Vol. 2 (2017)
Another classic
When do heard they were doing another nuke em high I was confused. How can you improve upon the perfection that the originals were. But was very pleasantly surprised. The budget on this must have been enormous. The acting and special effects could have been any blockbuster allowed to play at your local theaters. The cameos of superstars. Every minute of this film is an explosion of awesomeness for the senses. Where was it going. The mystery and suspense is heart pounding. If there was any justice in the world this director would have statues dedicated to him and whole classes teaching the kids how to do it right. If the story and satire is too much for you please understand that it is completely your fault. For you folks go watch the latest movie thats only millionaire's making extravagant and tacky films that they've been making for years which will help justify there millionaire lifestyle push their millionaire politics and maybe convince you that those millionaires are really just like you and would be your friend. For everyone else that loves true art see this film. Buy this film. And spread the disease of this film to all your friends.
Breaking Bad (2008)
Horrible show
This show is simply what suburbanites think of the city. It's incredibly stupid and with the time frame of the series it makes no sense. Only suburbanites who think drug dealers are scary city folk from 80s movies will enjoy this pointless show. Also can Bryan Cranston only make that face. Why all the close ups if that all he can manage to do.
Your Honor (2020)
Show should be called Bryan Cranston's face.
Is this all we expect anymore. Bryan Cranston making the same face all the time. And oh wait another close up of surprise surprise his face. Much like breaking bad this show is only about the serious face Bryan Cranston makes. Everything else is just to give him an excuse to make the same face again.
Poultrygeist: Night of the Chicken Dead (2006)
This is the troma film to recommend to your friends
Poultrygeist is easily one of my top ten favorite films. As an indigenous person living in America I'm sick of all the racist portrayals on us in film. This film however nailed it using humor. I can't believe people are turned away by a few crass jokes when the extreme political commentary is so important. This film would bring peace to the world if only everyone saw it. As the title suggests this is the most family friendly film troma has made. So give it away as presents to everyone you know. See poultrygeist and change the world for the better.
Bright (2017)
The film should just be called Will Smith part whatever
I honestly can't say a nice thing about this film. If you want to know what would happen if will Smith lived in a fantasy world this is it. Will Smith acts like he always does and it ruins the film. So I guess if you like will Smith watch this but otherwise this film is as big of a joke as Will Smith is.
Avengers: Endgame (2019)
Just stupid
For all the money this movie cost nobody wanted to pay for a decent script. No just let Bruce banner explain time travel in three seconds. This is just as bad as Superman turning the earth backwards to save lois Lane. For the money this cost this movie both sucks and is insulting.
Succession (2018)
Adam McKay wants to belong to the billionaires club
Another pointless show about rich people. It's amazing how many shows are just advertisements for the super rich. Way to go Adam McKay now you can be one too.
It (2017)
Pennywise was beaten with sticks
How is it possible that nobody ever thought to hit him with a stick before. How can a movie with professional writers and director who didn't understand that pennywise was weak to sticks. How did this movie cost so much. Why does everyone walk down the center of streets instead of on a sidewalk. Whoever directed this should never be allowed to direct again. They had a good story and decided to ruin it with pointless shots and bad writing.
Slashening: The Final Beginning (2021)
There better a part 3
Thinking that there was no way that they could improve on the first one they definitely proved me wrong. One of the funniest movies I have seen all year. They must have had more money as shown by the expert cinematography especially at the party scene with the fancy camera work. The plot twists at the end will blow u away. Hitchcock would have bowed to superiority of these twists to anything he put out. If this movie played in theaters it would have been a blockbuster starting all sorts of important conversations across the world. Everybody should see this movie even if you don't like it just because of it cultural importance. Of course if you want to see the same movie with the same actors making the same jokes with the same special effects in the background while pushing some pointless agenda then just go somewhere else and watch whatever the same studios are putting out. If you want true art and independent film making then don't just watch this movie. Tell everyone else to watch it.
Dune: Part One (2021)
This movie is a joke
Can the people in this movie even call themselves actors if all they do is stare blankly no matter what the situation. Is this a real movie or just a bad remake of Star wars. But i guess if the director is only famous for remaking better directors movies. What will he ruin next.