Guenniminator Reviews

Killing Gunther (2017)

a film as painful as a root canal at the dentist

[1/10 · 25 September 2022]

Falling asleep watching an Arnold Schwarzenegger movie and rewinding to see if you missed something only to realize you didn't miss anything says a lot about the quality. And if you don't want to get ear cancer, you can quickly switch off before the credits roll. This film boasts obsessive comedy, lousy acting (not) performance, a few explosions that look better in any new shooter on a PS5. This film definitely belongs in the category: films that were never needed and that you never have to see. It's nothing more than hazardous waste. Speaking of waste: it is a waste of time to watch this film. It's a shame we can't be compensated for that.

The Contractor (2007 Video)

Yawn!

[2/10 · 9 July 2022]

Boring and confusing story. Annoying light-effects, rediculous sound effects (during fight scene) and shaking camera in some scenes. A movie you don't need to watch, if you don't Knie it, yet.

Scream (I) (2022)

The past, the present, the future...?

[8/10 · 1 July 2022]

Of course it is a film in which some things are predictable. But: it's entertaining, has nostalgic allusions and moments, and still looks fresh, above all it's quite brutal. Unfortunately, the motif is a bit off, but hey, it's supposed to entertain and the film does that.

Possessor (2020)

waste of time

[1/10 · 11 April 2022]

A film with very harsh violent scenes that make absolutely no sense. Absolutely no one needs this film. A real plot is somehow hardly recognizable, I don't see any meaningful connections! One of the worst movies I've ever seen and this one has such a high rating? The level for good films has dropped significantly.

Why Don't You Just Die! (2018)

Russian Tarantino meets Guy Ritchie movie

[5/10 · 1 April 2022]

It seemed to be a simple story: a cop's daughter instigates her boyfriend to kill her father. However, this plan goes terribly wrong. In the course of the film some characters and their backgrounds are told in small sequences. This film wants to be funny on the one hand, but also has some serious tones in between.

However, the excessively bloody violent sequences don't always fit and miss their goal of making the film appear funny in an ironic or sarcastic way.

The film left a lot of potential behind, but overall it has an average entertainment value.

Pagan Peak (2018–2023)

after a long time finally a very good production from Germany and Austria

[8/10 · 2 February 2022]

Surprisingly good. Highly exciting serial killer hunt and very good acting performances, especially by Nicholas Ofczarek and Franz Hartwig. I heard about the series and expected something different, which was actually exceeded.

Hereditary (2018)

Waste of time

[1/10 · 8 January 2022]

I have never ever seen a movie full of crap like this before. I always waited for something special to happen. Awful acting and annoying characters in a very slow build up film full of crap. In the end the producers had to put some special effects in it but with no success - this movie is still garbage. The effects in this film were already be shown in the 70's.

The Grudge (2019)

Nothing new, nothing special

[2/10 · 8 January 2022]

I once saw a trailer, thought of the original movie and I hoped this will be better. More suspense, more athmosphere more horror, but, yet again: It is just another disappointing and predictable movie. Too many flashbacks in the story telling.

The Babadook (2014)

Painful to watch - and to listen to

[1/10 · 4 January 2022]

The protagonist child is incredibly annoying. The mother is a boring character who is (rightly) frustrated with her annoying child. You are just sitting by a movie of these two lame people. This movie really sucks . Lame film until some special effects try to somehow save the film. The effects are similar to films like The Exorcist or other demonic films like Hereditary. These two films compete very strongly for the title "films with the most annoying characters" and the lameest build-up of tension and stupid Plots and endings... I felt sorry for the dog in this trash-movie.

The Voices (2014)

Just no! - a stupid movie.

[2/10 · 7 September 2021]

I like Ryan Reynolds, but this movie is a desaster. I know it has a dark side and black sense of humor, but: no. The cat is the only character that made me laugh, just a little bit. The rest is stupid, awkward, silly, and not worth it.

Fantasy Island (2020)

Solid movie, nothing special

[4/10 · 7 September 2021]

This movie is not that bad by far, has a little surprise in the end. Some turns may be a little confusing but an average rating is okay. Some characters are annoying sometimes.

Security (I) (2017)

American version of Nid de guêpes from 2002

[5/10 · 18 March 2021]

This film has a "B-movie" character, but is quite entertaining to watch. Banderas and Kingsley are in good shape and both make solid performances. The film is slightly reminiscent of the French film "Nid de guêpes" from 2002 by Florent Emilio Siri (Cast: Sami Naceri, Benoît Magimel, Nadia Farès), where a small group holed up in a building that is besieged by criminals and is to be conquered in order to free a person - or, as here in this case, to kill. The story is irrelevant: A young girl who escapes an attack as a key witness seeks protection in a shopping center where a small group of night watchmen are on duty. One of the night watchmen is a former high-ranking soldier and tries to protect the girl's life and repel the attacks. The action isn't high class, but it's solid overall. A mall offers many defense options - with a higher budget, Banderas and Kingsley might have had a great duel in a larger mall, with more action and harder sequences. So the film is rather average but still entertaining.

Birds of Prey (2020)

This is awesome... NOT!

[2/10 · 5 October 2020]

The only reason to give 2 Stars is Ewan McGregor's performance. Every time he shows up in the movie, he made me laugh out loud! His performance saves a movie full of crap and garbage. This is more comedy, than a dark comic adoption. Glad, I did not spent any money in theatres for this.

Peppermint (2018)

nothing new but extremely entertaining

[8/10 · 5 September 2020]

There are many "revenge films" out there, this one is definitely one of the better ones. Simple story, little idle. It's very good that the "training scenes" have been omitted and the focus is on the action. The movie and the action are very tough and solid, a movie that is overall worth it.

Bloodshot (2020)

Big hype, slight disappointment.

[4/10 · 5 September 2020]

The trailer was very promising, the film itself disappointed a bit in the end, as it was advertised as "rated R". The action is solid, not outstanding.

The Gangster, the Cop, the Devil (2019)

It is worth watching it

[6/10 · 2 September 2020]

May contain light spoilers!

An over-motivated police officer wants to solve a series of murders, his boss (corrupt, smeared by a gang boss) does not believe in a serial killer. Only when the gang boss himself is accidentally attacked and survives do the police and mafia work together to catch the serial killer. Overall, solid, dark, tough action film, but with two slightly confused plot weaknesses.

The Dead Don't Die (2019)

Definetely not worth watching it

[1/10 · 26 April 2020]

Good cast don't promise a good movie. Boring, slow, stupid, and... wait, an UFO? Really? This is pure trash.

The Circle (I) (2017)

Weak as a film, horrible vision of reality

[2/10 · 28 March 2020]

If this is the future and should become a reality, I don't want to experience it. As for the film itself, you're waiting for something special to happen. More moments of tension are expected, but they do not exist. A little more background about Bailey's plans and his true intentions, his past. There are many open questions and a very disappointing end to the film.

Replicas (2018)

Made it to the list of the worst movies I've ever seen so far

[1/10 · 12 January 2020]

I have no idea how some rated this film 10. Have they ever seen a REALLY good movie? There are some good approaches, but even Keanu Reeves cannot save this film. Overall, it's just bad.

The Bag Man (I) (2014)

Waste of time

[1/10 · 14 November 2019]

Begins auspicious and interesting but unfolds with every minute and degenerates into an extremely boring movie without plot or tension.

Mad Max: Fury Road (2015)

ridiculously overrated - just solid and average

[4/10 · 12 November 2019]

90 Metascore - REALLY!?!? What has become of Hollywood, that this average movie was rated so extremely high? There are those who have rated him the best movie of the year 2015. Did they forget that "Run All Night" or "Spectre" were movies that were a lot better than "Mad Max" in 2015? It is almost a mockery to use the title "Mad Max" here. "Fury Road" would have been enough. Thankfully, my expectations were relatively low, so I can say here: I was not disappointed, but confirmed.

The Revenant (I) (2015)

Unrealistic and too long by far

[3/10 · 12 November 2019]

Honestly I had high expectations in the end I really got disappointed. This movie is unrealistic, too long and had many boring moments. Could have been told in about 90-100minutes max.

The Shape of Water (2017)

del Toro has lost it this time

[2/10 · 31 October 2019]

This movie seems to be del Toro' s version of "Creature From The Black Lagoon". It is just boring and sometimes really silly. I don't know why the academy just hyped this film. del Toro has proved, he can do much better.

Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark (2019)

Typical "del Toro" - wonderful story to tell and to watch in the dark

[8/10 · 25 October 2019]

"Pan's Labyrinth" is one of the best movies of all time. No doubt. A movie by del Toro just has to be good. My expectations for "Scary Stories To Tell In The Dark" were very high. Let's make things clear: not one of the best of all times, but very entertaining and entertaining to look at. Fresh and good cast, some well-placed funny moments and a very good story to tell and observe in the dark. Once again the creatures are awesome and somehow remind of the big "Pan's Labyrinth". I really enjoyed this movie.

Gemini Man (2019)

Surprisingly entertaining

[8/10 · 25 October 2019]

I have no idea why the critics have torn this movie so much. It certainly has its weaknesses and my expectations were more in the "science fiction" genre, but still this is a very good action movie that entertained me very well.