shuvcat-1 Reviews

Haunter (2013)

Changed ending?

[9/10 · 23 February 2017]

I first saw this movie on Netflix about two years ago, and I loved it. I loved it so much that I bought the DVD about two minutes after it ended. I liked it so much that I was actually kind of scared to watch it again; I was afraid it wouldn't be as good as I originally thought it was. But three or four nights ago, two years after I bought the DVD, I watched it. And... They changed the ending. In the version I first watched, Lisa gets on her bike at the end, and she rides off into the sunlight. I loved that scene. They cut it from the DVD. I don't know why. Is there a place where I can buy the DVD with the Netflix ending? I really want to see that ending. She earned it, after all that.

Legend of the Boneknapper Dragon (2010 TV Short)

It was good!

[10/10 · 14 November 2010]

I imagine the one poor review below was due to the reviewer believing (as I did) that LOTBD would be another feature film like HTTYD. True, it turns out to only be a short, but for what it is it's very good! No, the "stars" are not the main characters Hiccup and Toothless from the first film, but is that so strange? Lots of shorts spotlight secondary characters from the original movie. In this sequel, Gobber goes on a hunt for his old nemesis, the Boneknapper Dragon. He enlists Hiccup and the other junior Vikings, none of whom are quite sure the so-called "Boneknapper" even exists. Since the focus is on Gobber this is Craig Ferguson's party and that's just fine with me; his performance was awesome in the first movie, and here his expressive rantings narrate the growingly ridiculous exploits of Gobber perfectly. The plot is pretty much the same as HTTYD's but that's not such a bad thing. All around, it's a charming little extra chapter of the wonderful original film.

Goddess of Love (1988 TV Movie)

Bad 80s gold!

[6 December 2008]

I remember seeing this (twice!) on TV as a kid and totally loving the novelty of Vanna from Wheel playing Venus. (I was a pretty stupid kid) This is 80's bad TV-movie gold. Every inch filmed in the Dynasty/Aaron Spelling era California of the 80s. Even the soundtrack is total 80s sitcom synth. Rips totally from movies like Mannequin, Earth Girls Are Easy and Date With An Angel, and precursors the camp of Xena and Hercules. (Callisto bears a striking resemblance to Vanna, doesn't she?) And Vanna actually made me laugh when she masquerades as "Vera" the Southern-fried cousin. She actually hit a few comic notes there.

Silly and fluffy, but fun enough to include on your bad 80's movie night.

Hobgoblins (1988)

UP!! All Night.....

[2/10 · 21 February 2006]

This film rips me back to the very late 1980's/early 1990's, when Letterman used to be the end of NBC's broadcasting every night, and the only thing worth watching after 12 midnight was USA's UP...All Night, starring Gilbert Gottfried and later the blonde trampy ho whose name I can't recall, introing really dreadful movies that a 12-year-old like me used to later esspy the video boxes of, in their town's local Food Happy Mart.

I recently bought this as part of MST's DVD Vol 8, but I keep watching it, because *something* about it keeps triggering a repressed memory in me. Is "Hobgoblins" one of the trashy late 80's "horror" flicks hosted by Rhonda Shear at 1 AM back in 1989 on USA? I can almost remember.... and yet some dark shadow is barring the path in my mind's eye... perhaps to my own benefit.....

Nah, if I can remember "Hello Mary Sue: Prom Night 2" and "Terrorvision", surely I can't be that scarred by recalling "Hobgoblins". Yes, I will assume that I first saw this alone, without the aid of Mike or Bots. I can handle it. You Can't Handle The Truth!!.......

The Dream Team (1989)

"It's great to be young and insane..."

[8/10 · 16 January 2006]

One of my favorites of Christopher Lloyd's films, though I came to love the ensemble casting of Michael Keaton, Peter Boyle and Stephen Furst. Keaton is great in this; he filmed this the same year he was filming the first "Batman" movie. Also a very fine performance by Dennis Boutsikaris as the kindly, ill-fated doctor. (My mother and I were always surprised when we saw him in movies afterward; he seemingly has not played anything but a**holes and arrogant lawyers since. This seems to be the one and only halfway likable character he's played.) You have to admit, if mental hospitals were this accommodating and peaceful in real life, being insane wouldn't be such a bad gig. :) I almost wanted to have myself committed by the end of this. (That's perhaps not the glowing recommendation of this film that I mean it to be....) It's like if Lloyd's other "looney bin" movie "One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest" had a happy ending. A gentle, harmless film to sit back and relax with. Watch for the cute yet slightly eerie reference to the World Trade Center. Another good New York crime comedy to watch back to back with this is "Quick Change" starring Bill Murray, Geena Davis and Randy Quaid.

Dead Last (2001)

Should've given it a chance, WB.

[23 October 2005]

There's actually a real-world band called Dead F***ing Last. I wonder whether that's where they got the name for this show.

I confess, I only had an interest in watching this thing because Harry Groener was guest-starring on it. But I have since acquired all the episodes on DVD, partly because of Tyler Labine (currently starring on ABC's "Invasion"). He was far and away the most believable and convincing of the three "rock stars". This series wanted to be a supernatural spin on movies like "Almost Famous", and it would have succeeded, had the WB not been such arses about scheduling it. The rest of the cast and the writers would have gotten better with time. It's the curse of television sitcoms that time is one commodity they can't afford.

Best episodes: "The Crawford Touch" guest-starring "Ghoulies" Michael DesBarres as a evil rock producer impresario who traps the gang and forces them to contact his resident ghost, a Kurt-Cobain type genius whose final record is hidden/lost forever. "To Live And Amulet Die", simply on the strength of my Harry being in it :) as an evil professor obsessed with gaining the band's magical amulet. The pilot and the lion's share of eps I'm sorry to say weren't that good. But they *would've* gotten better-- and Labine is fun to watch in every single ep; we can only hope "Invasion" kicks him off on the strong career "Dead Last" should have.

Just an aside: no series about any band will ever succeed without extended footage of the "band" performing at least one honest to God hit. "Dead Last" made the mistake of cutting away right when The Problem hit the stage. Nobody is going to believe your series about a struggling rock band unless you actually show them playing; I'm sorry, but it's a fact. There's a reason "The Monkees" lasted more than one season.

American Playhouse: Overdrawn at the Memory Bank (1983) Season Unknown, Episode Unknown

Bad execution at its worst

[4/10 · 8 October 2005]

Actually, the core concept at the center of OATMB is a good one: in an future fascist society, one "creative thinker" is punished for his "subversive" follies-- watching old Hollywood films-- by being given "rehabilitative" treatment-- being sent on vacation in the brain of a baboon. By a deus ex machina (the establishment misplaces his brain) he gets the chance to mess around with the computer that controls the world (including the weather and the financial system) and eventually brings down the head brain in charge of it all. It wants to be a more optimistic version of "Harrison Bergeron", basically.

And it fails horribly. It's the textbook example of a good idea that was handled by deeply inept people (kind of like FEMA). Much speculation has been made over how they got Raul Julia to star in this thing. I'm guessing he read a (very early) first draft of the script, thought it was a great idea, signed on, then couldn't get out. The end result is like a staging of "Hamlet" by a troupe of high school freshmen-- which MST3K also got a hold of, by all accounts.

And as far as all the slams against the use of video vs. film-- get over it. Everything PBS showed in the 80's was filmed on video, as I recall.

The Catlins (1982–1985)

Dude, I remember this

[17 September 2005]

...as the *only* soap opera that my mother or I ever watched, ever. It was 1984 or so and I was sick to death with chicken pox, home from school recuperating and trying not to scratch, and my mom who has never watched a soap since was like, "No, we've got to see this, it's good." All I can recall from it was that one woman was a witch or a psychic, and could will things to happen. At one point she tries to entice one of the "good" guys, telling him, "Acknowledge my powers! Then you can have them too!" This point, the supernatural part, was about the only thing that interested me at five years old. The fellow who was the main character had a strange deformity on his face; either it was prosthetic or he really did have half his skin dripping down his cheek. And at some point there was some important plot point involving some woman's high heels in a closet. That was all.

Give me a break, it was twenty five years ago and I was groggy from the pox, people. :P

Stargate (1994)

Better than the series

[8/10 · 11 September 2005]

I saw this in the theatre in '94, it was awesome then and 11 years later I must be one of few who prefer the original movie over the spin off television series. Sorry, but I felt having stargates on every other planet kind of cheapened the idea. Not a huge fan of MacGuyver either. In my opinion the movie is far more impressive, possibly due to the superior special effects or the "mystery" of the Earthlings figuring out the gate for the first time.

I'm the first to admit there are flaws-- the alien planet has not one but *three* moons which look EXACTLY LIKE OURS; a sloppy FX shortcut in a movie full of otherwise sparkling effects-- but they're forgivable in the face of a truly smart script connecting ancient Egypt and alien life-- only way they might have improved it was maybe to include something about Stonehenge. I'm a sucker for anything about ancient Eypgt so I was a perfect target for this movie. Also, it might be considered a premonition, as far as having the androgynous black/white sequined "king" surrounding himself with young boys... a whole year or so before Michael Jackson started really getting in trouble with the law. Yikes.

In short, a great film. Beautiful sets, and fine acting from everyone involved. It's fun to see "Harry Solomon" from 3rd Rock From The Sun (French Stewart) in his first film role too.

Manos: The Hands of Fate (1966)

It's not that bad!!!

[8/10 · 1 June 2005]

I'm talking about Manos: Hands of Fate, which is widely regarded as the worst film ever. I first saw it thru MST3K, like most people. I found myself wondering what the "uncut" version had been like (the MST DVD did not come with the "original" version of the movie, like many MST DVDs do.) I finally broke down and bought the unMSTed DVD on Amazon, just to see the "unedited" version. (I'll say this, the MST version was actually in better, less crackly shape.) Yes, the original "Manos" is still slow-moving, with endless shots of countryside that serve no purpose. Yes, the acting is atrocious. Yes, there's continuity holes galore (When exactly is the Master going to actually kill Torgo, anyway??). These are all things that can also be said about the original "Carnival Of Souls", which is (rightly) considered a classic camp/horror masterpiece.

The characters of the Master and Torgo are two of the most widely laughed at in film history, but they're also the best performances in this film. Tom Neyman as the Master is honestly evil-looking and scary, especially in the couple of scenes they cut out for the MST version. The late John Reynolds' spazzy performance as Torgo can only half be attributed to the drugs he was allegedly on at the time; the guy was either a for-real mental case, or he was damn good at acting like one. Director/Father Harold P. Warren voiced all the male characters in the widely-razzed voice-over-- and I happen to think he did a rather good job. Sure, they all sound alike-- but only a little bit. And tell me you can imagine Torgo with any other voice! In nearly every frame, you can see what they were *trying* to do (and might have succeeded at, had they been in more capable hands). The seemingly pointless teens kissing in the car serve as part of the "fate" concept-- if only the cops hadn't come along and shoved them off, the father might have been able to ask them for proper directions to get out of there. Or perhaps the teens are prisoners of the Master themselves! The ludicrous name of the "god" Manos-- actually quite fitting, since the cult is worshipping the fickle hands of fate. The ending is honestly skincrawly, finding out what happened to the couple's little girl-- and what's about to happen to the two new, roadtripping girlfriends.

It's said that various people (Tarantino for one) are thinking of actually remaking "Manos". Here's hoping they never do. The fact that no one ever heard of any of the cast before or since contributes greatly to the eerie, last-known-photograph feel of the film. To see it remade with big name actors who are only capable of playing themselves-as-cult-hero would make it every bit as inane and bad as people are already saying the original "Manos" is. Let's leave it with the little bit of dignity is has, shall we?