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Reviews
Among Us (2004)
Oh... my... god
Watching this the only thing that kept running through my mind was "These are the best actors they could find?!?"
Honestly, the acting in this movie makes me nostalgic for watching an elementary school play. At least the kids there have the excuse that they're only seven.
I personally love B movies and have, over the years, seen thousands of them. This doesn't count as a B movie. It belongs further down the alphabet - much further. There were a couple of lines that were actually quite funny and witty - or at least they would have been had the delivery of the actors been anything but a badly acted monotone. As I said, I like bad movies but this thing I couldn't even watch in one sitting. If it were possible to give a film a negative score i would have, instead I had to settle for only giving it a one. If you're ever channel surfing late at night and get the chance to watch this I would recommend the test pattern instead.
Space Fury (1999)
Definitely a must not see
Now, I LIKE bad movies. I particularly LIKE bad Science Fiction movies. But this was just completely unwatchable. It's not good in a bad way that, say, Army of Darkness was. If it's not the very worst movie I've ever seen it's definitely top five and the only thing keeping it from the top spot is that I've managed to mercifully block out the memories of the other four and can't quite remember what they are. The actors in this film quite possibly have the worst accents ever recorded on film. That is, of course, when they remembered that they were supposed to HAVE an accent. Here you have people who seriously over-act one minute and sound like a parody of an extremely cliched, stereotypical Russian only to then deliver a line later on that is beyond a doubt North American. The female lead, who is supposed to be French, sounds about as French as a native New Yorker. Then there's the plot - what there is of it. Speaking as a novelist, I can honestly say that I've come up with better, more cohesive and entirely more plausible plots on napkins in a bar while out drinking and partying heavily. The dialogue is bad, the science is worse, the sets are horrible (Galaxina looked better and if you've seen that film you will know what I'm talking about - even the Super-Marionation of the Thunderbirds looked better for that matter) and it doesn't even explain anything at then end. You know what happened, but the why is never even touched upon. I can only assume that the writers either had no idea or simply didn't give a damn. I think the movie can be adequately summed up by sharing a thought that kept running through my mind the entire time I was watching this thing: "These are the people who WON their auditions?? How bad were the people who lost out??"